The Hidden Cost of Seeming Calm – Dilpreet Buxi on ADHD and Masking | Ep 129

Calm on the outside. Spiraling on the inside.Dilpreet Buxi shares what it was like to grow up masking anxiety, living with a constantly racing mind, and slowly realizing his nervous system works differently.If you struggle with chronic stress, masking, emotional dysregulation, or feeling “fine” while everything feels too much inside, this episode explores why stress begins in the body, how autistic and ADHD nervous systems process stress differently, and what actually helps.Dilpreet Buxi is the CEO and Co-founder of Philia Labs, a Melbourne-based company using wearable technology and biomedical engineering to make stress measurable and manageable. With a PhD in Electrical Engineering from Monash University, his work focuses on supporting autistic people, people with anxiety, and their caregivers through objective stress measurement and early intervention.Episode Highlights:00:03:05 — Masking anxiety behind calm He describes learning to appear calm while feeling deeply stressed inside. The disconnect between outer presentation and inner reality shaped how he understood himself.00:07:27 — Realizing he may be neurodivergent After pivoting his company toward supporting autistic people, he began recognizing the same patterns in his own life. Reading about nervous system differences forced uncomfortable self-reflection.00:13:00 — Choosing to pivot or shut down After hearing caregiver stories, the team faced a choice: pivot or wind down the company. The decision became personal when his co-founder connected the mission to his autistic brother.00:19:00 — Acute vs chronic stress He explains the difference between moment-to-moment stress and stress that reshapes the body over months. Chronic stress quietly drives fatigue, sleep problems, and emotional dysregulation.00:24:16 — You can’t outthink stress Stress regulation starts in the body, not the mind. Movement, breathing, and vagus-nerve-stimulating practices matter more than positive thinking.00:32:23 — Winding down for real sleep Evening yoga, meditation, gratitude, and keeping the phone out of reach help his nervous system switch into rest mode. Better sleep becomes the foundation for everything else.Connect with Dilpreet:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dilpreet-buxi/Website: https://solutions.philialabs.com.au/Connect with Jeremy:LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/nageljeremyEmail: [email protected] from Focus Bear:Website: https://focusbear.ioLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/focus-bear/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@focusbearappTwitter: https://twitter.com/focusbear1Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/focus_bear/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/focusbearapp/Podcast: https://podcast.focusbear.ioTiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@focusbear