The Moon And Sixpence 28.6

"Oh, my dear, " hegroaned at last, "how can you be so cruel?"

"I can't help myself,Dirk, " she answered.

"I've worshipped you asno woman was ever worshipped before. If in anything I did I displeased you, whydidn't you tell me, and I'd have changed. I've done everything I could for you."

She did not answer. Her facewas set, and he saw that he was only boring her. She put on a coat and her hat.She moved towards the door, and he saw that in a moment she would be gone. Hewent up to her quickly and fell on his knees before her, seizing her hands: heabandoned all self-respect.

"Oh, don't go, mydarling. I can't live without you; I shall kill myself. If I've done anythingto offend you I beg you to forgive me. Give me another chance. I'll try harderstill to make you happy. "

"Get up, Dirk. You'remaking yourself a perfect fool. "

He staggered to his feet,but still he would not let her go.

"Where are yougoing?" he said hastily. "You don't know what Strickland's place is like.You can't live there. It would be awful. "

"If I don't care, Idon't see why you should. "

"Stay a minute longer.I must speak. After all, you can't grudge me that. "

"What is the good? I'vemade up my mind. Nothing that you can say will make me alter it. "

He gulped, and put his handto his heart to ease its painful beating.

“啊，我的亲爱的，”最后他呻吟着说，“你怎么能这样残忍啊？”

“我也由不得自己，戴尔克，”她回答。

“我崇拜你，世界上再也没有哪个女人受过人们这样的崇拜。如果我做了什么事使你不高兴，为什么你不对我讲？只要你说了，我一定会改过来的。为了你，凡是我能做到的我都做了。”

她并没有回答。她的脸上一点表情也没有，他看到自己只不过在惹她生厌。她穿上一件外衣，戴上帽子，向门口走去。他明白再过一分钟他就再也见不到她了，于是很快地走到她前面，跪倒在地上，抓住她的两只手；他什么脸面也不顾了。

“啊，不要走，亲爱的。没有你我就活不下去了，我会自杀的。如果我做了什么事惹恼了你，我求你原谅我。再给我一次机会吧。我会更努力地使你幸福的。”

“站起来，戴尔克。你简直丢尽丑了。”

他摇摇晃晃地站了起来，但是仍然不放她走。

“你到哪儿去啊？”他急急忙忙地问，“你不知道思特里克兰德住在怎样一个地方。你在那地方是过活不了的。太可怕了。”

“如果我自己都不在乎，与你又有什么相干呢？”

“你再待一会，容我把话说完。不管怎么样，这一点你还可以让我做到吧。”

“那又有什么好处？我已经下了决心了。不管你说什么都改变不了我的主意。”

他抽了一口气，把一只手按在胸脯上，因为心脏跳动得简直让他忍受不了了。