The Narcissist Didn't Know … Why Intent Matters Less Than You Think

Psychopaths gaslight deliberately … they know what they're doingNarcissists confabulate … they genuinely believe their own liesThe shared fantasy is a compulsion, not a strategy; the discard was baked in from the startSurvivors who seek answers from the abuser are asking a closed question … neither type can give a reliable answerThe key pivot: "as far as the victim is concerned, it doesn't matter who cares" … the harm is the harm regardless of the mechanismOLNE landing: stop seeking clarity from the thing that obscures it; build a self that doesn't require the abuser's understanding in order to be whole