The Person You Want Requires a Person You're Not Yet — Adam Roa on Love, Polarity & Creative Life Force

To attract someone honest, you don't need to be honest. You need to be a space that can hold honesty. That distinction — the match, not the mirror — is one of a dozen reframes in this conversation that will quietly rearrange how you think about love. Adam Roa is a poet, artist, and coach whose spoken word performance "You Are Who You've Been Looking For" became the most viral poetry performance in history — over 250 million views. But the man behind the poem spent years unable to express emotion at all, raised in a home where feelings weren't safe. His new book, Crazy Love, opens his actual journals from nearly two decades of searching for love, finding it, losing it, and putting himself back together. In this episode, Adam and Michael go deep into: — The mechanics of masculine and feminine energy — and the two karmic wounds ("I am not enough" / "I am too much") that every relationship will eventually force you to face — Why the Gottman Institute found that couples together fifty years are still fighting about the same things they fought about on their first dates — and why that's actually the key to lasting love — The "goddess time" problem: what to do when your partner's relationship to time (or anything else) triggers you — and how to build agreements instead of resentment — Why your triggers in dating are rarely about the thing itself — the body count, the lateness — and how to gather the data that actually matters — Creativity as life force: why your unique frequency is the most healing thing you can offer the world, and how to find the clues your soul has left you — The practice behind the virality: how showing up to create, over and over, without needing to know where it leads, is what makes you ready when the moment arrives Adam also performs two poems in full — including the one that reached a quarter of a billion people. "Vulnerability is the gateway to connection. If we are seeking connection — to each other, to ourselves, and to life itself — we have to be willing to be vulnerable through the authentic expression of our creative energy." — Adam Roa Adam's book Crazy Love is available now. Find Adam at adamroa.com and on Instagram @adam.roa. Michael Trainer has spent 30 years learning from Nobel laureates, neuroscientists, and wisdom keepers worldwide. He's the author of RESONANCE: The Art and Science of Human Connection, co-creator of Global Citizen and the Global Citizen Festival, and host of the RESONANCE podcast.Featured in Forbes, Inc, Good Morning America.  Follow on YouTube