The Power of Regret--How to Use What Hurts to Reveal What Matters

In this episode:🎓 The true story of a graduation-day regret—and what it revealed about perfectionism, presence, and personal agency🧠 The neuroscience of regret: why we feel it so strongly, and how the orbitofrontal cortex plays a key role📉 Why elderly people regret what they didn’t do more than what they did🔁 Growth mindset vs. fixed mindset: how to use regret as fuel instead of shame🛠️ How regret can help you clarify your values—and take meaningful action🌊 Jess’s real-life “Quantum Leap” moment, 30 years laterTakeaways:✔ Regret shows you what matters✔ You can rewrite the story—starting now✔ Growth mindset turns regret into forward motion✔ Small, symbolic action can heal big emotional weightClosing challenge:What’s one regret you still carry? What value does it reflect—and what’s one small action you can take this week to get back in alignment with it?Episode Resources:🧠 Research and Psychology of RegretGilovich, T., & Medvec, V. H. (1995). The Experience of Regret: What, When, and Why.Psychological Review, Vol. 102(2), 379–395This foundational study found that people tend to regret inactions more than actions over time. The finding underpins much of the episode’s discussion on long-term regret.Rosenzweig, S. (2014). Regret in Decision Making: A Developmental Perspective.APA PsycNet - ReviewDiscusses how regret is a critical emotion in learning and personal development, especially in reflecting on values.O’Connor, L. E., Berry, J. W., Lewis, T., Mulherin, K., & Crisostomo, P. (2007).Empathy and the Vagal System.Annals of the New York Academy of SciencesOffers insight into the bodily sensation of regret and its connection to empathy and vagal tone—physiological markers of emotional response.🧠 Neuroscience and the Brain’s Role in RegretCamille, N., Coricelli, G., Sallet, J., Pradat-Diehl, P., Duhamel, J. R., & Sirigu, A. (2004). The Involvement of the Orbitofrontal Cortex in the Experience of Regret.Science, 304(5674), 1167–1170Demonstrates the specific role of the brain’s orbitofrontal cortex in generating the emotion of regret—a key point for understanding its physical and emotional power.💡 Growth Mindset and Learning from RegretDweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.Amazon linkCarol Dweck’s work on fixed vs. growth mindset forms the basis for how we view regret as either a dead-end or a learning opportunity.Pink, D. H. (2022). The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward.DanielPink.comDaniel Pink’s book was a major source of inspiration for this episode and covers extensive survey research on what people regret most—and how we can use it to grow.🔄 Action, Agency, and the Neuroscience of MomentumKorb, A. (2015). The Upward Spiral: Using Neuroscience to Reverse the Course of Depression, One Small Change at a Time.Amazon linkExplains how small actions, like choosing movement over rumination, shift brain chemistry and behavior positively—key to the “just take one step” message in the episode.Duckworth, A. (2016). Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance.Amazon linkAdds to the discussion around long-term growth and using tough emotions like regret as fuel for meaningful achievement. Are you looking for a speaker to energize and empower your organization to develop a fighter's mindset and master their mental performance every day? Or are you interested in a talk or workshop on The Green Light Method, a neuroscience- and performance psychology-based system that helps individuals and teams live and work with Fierce Agency (TM), override fear-based hesitation, rewire limiting beliefs, and take aligned, empowered action toward peak performance and purpose-driven success?DM me today on LinkedIn or email me at [email protected]. Ready to win more at trial without burnout? Limited spaces are still available to secure your own 1:1, 8-week Accelerated Trial Fight Camp.DM me today on LinkedIn or email me at [email protected]. The Legal Athlete Website: Click to learn more about engaging Jess Sargus as a speaker for your group or event, or to explore coaching with Jess Sargus to master your mindset, execute under pressure, and thrive in your career and life for the long term through science and sports psychology.  Also, through the website, you can download a free copy of The Legal Athlete Daily Planner to help you organize and prioritize easily to grow and get better every day, practice the 6 longevity habits studies show have the greatest positive impact, and implement your Daily Glimmer habit to bring more resilience and happiness into your life. Or, download and print the 4 Steps to Elite Habits flow chart PDF for free to guide your daily and weekly elite habits.  Music: Bounce Like This, by Wolves - YouTube ID UUFGDERWUSZ9LXWLReady to Fight, by Arenas - YouTube ID XKO39W3SJHGS9EKW