The Real Reason Men Are Terrified of Fatherhood | Devin Schadt and Adam Lane Smith episode artwork

EPISODE · May 8, 2026 · 1H 16M

The Real Reason Men Are Terrified of Fatherhood | Devin Schadt and Adam Lane Smith

from I Wish You Knew · host Adam Lane Smith & Andrey Korikov

Why would a man embrace marriage and fatherhood in 2026? Most men are not asking that question with curiosity. They are asking it with exhaustion. They have heard a thousand reasons why marriage is a trap, why fatherhood is a burden, and why the risk is not worth the reward. And almost nobody is giving them a reason to say yes. Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist, sits down with Devin Schadt, Executive Director of Fathers of Saint Joseph, for a conversation about what fatherhood actually is, why men are starving for it without knowing it, and why the crisis at the center of every social, financial, and cultural problem in America traces back to one thing: the absence of fathers. What you will learn in this conversation: 1- Why masculinity finds its fulfillment in spiritual fatherhood and what that means for men who have never heard it framed that way 2- What the statistics on fatherless homes actually show and why every major social crisis connects back to this one root 3- Why men are wired for mission and what happens to a man's nervous system when that mission is denied or never given to him 4- Why living in relationship is the hardest and most necessary thing a man can do and why his instinct to solve and complete works against him 5- Why trust in God the Father is the foundation of becoming a father worth trusting and what that looks like in daily life 6- How a man leads his wife in a way that she follows eagerly and why most men have never been shown what that actually looks like 7- Why loneliness precedes depression in men and what the research says about isolation versus solitude 8- The five practical steps for building real brotherhood with other men and why most men's groups fail before they start 9- Why the mission of fatherhood is the one thing that can unite men across every political, cultural, and ideological divide If you are a man wondering whether marriage and fatherhood are worth it, or a father who is already in it and not sure he is doing it right, this conversation is going to give you something the culture has stopped offering: a reason to say yes. 📚 WORK WITH ME 💬 1:1 COACHING Work directly with my team: https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/private-coaching/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 📋 FREE ATTACHMENT QUIZ Find out your attachment style in under 5 minutes: https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/attachment-quiz-organic/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 📬 NEWSLETTER Get weekly insights on attachment patterns:  https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1 Devin Schadt: Link: www.fathersofstjoseph.org https://www.instagram.com/fathersofstjoseph/ https://www.facebook.com/fathersofstjoseph New book: https://sophiainstitute.com/product/the-rule/?srsltid=AfmBOop4QoDaN1IppaIPsTNLWy2PqJ9gaTU00QcJrEFGynRdUgZtSbS1

Why would a man embrace marriage and fatherhood in 2026? Most men are not asking that question with curiosity. They are asking it with exhaustion. They have heard a thousand reasons why marriage is a trap, why fatherhood is a burden, and why the risk is not worth the reward. And almost nobody is giving them a reason to say yes. Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist, sits down with Devin Schadt, Executive Director of Fathers of Saint Joseph, for a conversation about what fatherhood actually is, why men are starving for it without knowing it, and why the crisis at the center of every social, financial, and cultural problem in America traces back to one thing: the absence of fathers. What you will learn in this conversation:1- Why masculinity finds its fulfillment in spiritual fatherhood and what that means for men who have never heard it framed that way2- What the statistics on fatherless homes actually show and why every major social crisis connects back to this one root3- Why men are wired for mission and what happens to a man's nervous system when that mission is denied or never given to him4- Why living in relationship is the hardest and most necessary thing a man can do and why his instinct to solve and complete works against him5- Why trust in God the Father is the foundation of becoming a father worth trusting and what that looks like in daily life6- How a man leads his wife in a way that she follows eagerly and why most men have never been shown what that actually looks like7- Why loneliness precedes depression in men and what the research says about isolation versus solitude8- The five practical steps for building real brotherhood with other men and why most men's groups fail before they start9- Why the mission of fatherhood is the one thing that can unite men across every political, cultural, and ideological divide If you are a man wondering whether marriage and fatherhood are worth it, or a father who is already in it and not sure he is doing it right, this conversation is going to give you something the culture has stopped offering: a reason to say yes. 📚 WORK WITH ME 💬 1:1 COACHING Work directly with my team: https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/private-coaching/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 📋 FREE ATTACHMENT QUIZ Find out your attachment style in under 5 minutes: https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/attachment-quiz-organic/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 📬 NEWSLETTER Get weekly insights on attachment patterns: https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_content=5/7 Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/ I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1 Devin Schadt:Link: www.fathersofstjoseph.orghttps://www.instagram.com/fathersofstjoseph/https://www.facebook.com/fathersofstjosephNew book: https://sophiainstitute.com/product/the-rule/?srsltid=AfmBOop4QoDaN1IppaIPsTNLWy2PqJ9gaTU00QcJrEFGynRdUgZtSbS1

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The Real Reason Men Are Terrified of Fatherhood | Devin Schadt and Adam Lane Smith

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This episode was published on May 8, 2026.

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Why would a man embrace marriage and fatherhood in 2026? Most men are not asking that question with curiosity. They are asking it with exhaustion. They have heard a thousand reasons why marriage is a trap, why fatherhood is a burden, and why the...

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