The Real Reason We Struggle to Talk About S3x | Dr Tara

EP 43: Mx Tomie sits down with award-winning sexologist and TV sex expert Dr. Tara to explore how pleasure, kink, and communication intersect with power, shame, and liberation. They unpack why conversations about sex—and money—are often the hardest in long-term relationships, how shame is used as a tool of control (especially against women and marginalized communities), and how reclaiming pleasure can radically shift how we show up in our lives. From morning “pleasure routines” that replace coffee, to kink-aware ways of talking about desire with a vanilla partner, to the deeper psychology behind BDSM and humiliation, this episode weaves together practical tools, personal stories, and unapologetically real talk. Dr. Tara also shares insights from her domme training with a professional dominatrix, her perspective on television as a form of sex education, and what happens when high-powered people finally have permission to let go—and be held. Chapters 0:00 — 1:00 Dr. Tara Introduction 1:00 — 2:00 Mx Tomie Introduces Dr. Tara 2:00 — 04:50 Sexual Wellness as “Morning Coffee” and Pleasure Routine 04:50 – 7:36 Sex Toys, Pleasure Pathways & “Desensitization” Myths 07:36 – 10:01 Growing Up Repressed in Bangkok & Finding Sexology 10:01 – 12:44 Sex, Money, Power & Walking on Eggshells 12:44 – 16:38 Kinks, Shame & What Clients Confess 16:38 – 21:21 Three Practical Tips for Sharing Kinks with a Partner 21:21 – 26:50 Coaching Couples, Normalizing Kink & Finding the Right Therapist 26:50 – 28:50 Dom Training: From Theory to Practice 28:50 – 30:33 | Favorite Dom Activities & Dominant Archetypes 28:58 – 30:38 TV, Sex Ed & Where the Biggest Gaps Are 30:38 – 34:04 Shame as Social Control & Performing Sex 34:04 – 35:09 Cultural Shame Around Divorce & Staying “For the Kids” Follow Our Guest: IG - https://www.instagram.com/luvbites.co/ Support the Show 💻 Join today, visit iwantclips.com use code MXTOMIE for 15% off your shopping cart, and Artists claim 90% rev share for your first three months! 📲 Be sure to subscribe — help us reach 10K subs! Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@UncensoredWithMxTomie 🌶️ For the extra-spicy, uncut content we can’t air here, join the Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/UncensoredwithMxTomie Follow Mx Tomie 🖤 IG — https://www.instagram.com/mx.tomie.digital TikTok — https://www.tiktok.com/@mx.tomie Follow Uncensored with Mx Tomie IG — https://www.instagram.com/uncensoredwithmxtomie/ TikTok — https://www.tiktok.com/@uncensoredwithmxtomie FB — https://www.facebook.com/uncensoredwithmxtomie YouTube — https://www.youtube.com/@UncensoredWithMxTomie