Hello and welcome to the Get to Life Podcast where we have conversations about organ tissue and eye donation and transplantation. You can always find us at thegiftedlife.org. I'm Roy Steele. I'm Joey Boudreau.
I'm Sarah Vlehvar, coming up on this episode. We'll be talking to someone whose entire career has been dedicated to making life happen through donation. On this episode, you'll hear her why and how her hero is being celebrated. And we're going to talk about social media and how we reassure seek on it.
Oh wow. Okay, lots to get to here on the Get to Life Podcast. Here on the Get to Life Podcast, we are happy to have Miss Pam Cart on this episode. Hey, ma'am.
How are you? I'm good. I'm good. We're all smiling.
We have all a connection with Pam in some way, shape or form. She's been with Lopa, which feels like forever. Yeah, at least since before organ transplant took place. She has been working to make life happen for what seems like ever.
Yeah, so what was it Pam? 16, we were talking about it early, 16, 17 years? Well, and 20 years actually, well, actually 24 years in recovery because I did eye banking prior to Lopa. And that's actually where Pam and I first met.
She worked for a Southern Eye Bank and when I started with Lopa in 2002, we did a lot of travel together. We did because we service the same area, Southwest Louisiana for the most part. She did Southern Eye Bank community development and of course our Lafayette office kind of, we all chipped in and did some community. So we did a lot of road trips together.
Yes. Yes. Good memories. Good times.
Yes, Erin and I were saying, what's her official title with Lopa? Well, she just does everything. Anything and everything. Yeah, I love her.
But you do have a title for Lopa and you do a fantastic job. She's Lopa's forensic relations specialist and we can't thank you enough. So we kind of get into what it is that you do for Lopa and for our families each and every day. But on this episode, we want to talk about your why and why you started doing what you do, why you're so passionate about it.
And that's because of your hero. Yes. My hero is my son, Ryan Scott Clark, who was born October 31, 1983 and deceased February 10, 1997. And basically I was working in dialysis and dializing patients who needed kidney transplants or in order to continue a part of a normal life, they would come and we would dialize them and three to four times a week at three and four hours each time.
And they had asked me, I had worked with some that were recovering cornias and whole life for transplant and research. And they had asked me about a year before and 96, I guess, if I would do that on the side. And I was like, Oh, I ain't no way I could do that. I passed out at my momma's eye surgery.
But I was like, do you want to watch them? And of course, you know, I said, yes. Then he put me in the room was dark, dark at that time, laser surgeries and eye surgeries. You were in the dark.
And so he put me watching through this microscope and I started getting hotter and hotter. And I knew I needed to get out of there. And so I went to go to the door and the doctor's like, where are you going? I said, I got to get out.
I think I'm going to pass out. That was it. I thought that my momma had to wait on me. She was finished and I was still fast out.
So I didn't know that I could. And then after a year after Ryan died, they asked me again. And I said, Oh, I don't know. I said, well, I'm going to tell you this.
Because again, my passion was to definitely utilize gifts that could be used for others because we had said yes for Ryan. And so I said, I'll try. And so I did. And then again, the passion just grew and grew and grew and grew.
And then of course I was infactuated with LOPA and that they were able to do even more through donation and research. So I put in an application with LOPA and was hired on. And a lot of that came from our growth together because LOPA had allowed me office in the Lafayette building when I was working with Southern I think and doing recoveries. So we grew to know each other and we educated together the community activities together.
Anyway, I hired and my first position with LOPA was to help educate the hospitals, physicians and nurses and that. And like Joey said, in the beginning of time, it was just begging them to make the phone call because that in itself was the beginning of donation because this was the way we were going to be notified of a potential donor once they met a certain criteria. So that was basic education then and then giving back stats and how these things grew and how the community grew. And even though it was a bittersweet experience that life was happening because they made that call.
They picked up that phone. And so that and then I approached families also in the Lake Charles and Southwest Louisiana areas. So that and then my husband was transferred to the North part of the state and I wasn't moving. Oh my goodness.
We weren't letting you go. I thought my dream job, how in the world I just couldn't and then I said, well Lord, I'm going to do it with a glad heart. And so I approached my director at that time with Chris and so there was a need at that time for someone to help in the corners and help them to educate them, see how we could collaborate better and and that. So I took on that role and that's been my, I guess, heart since then is working with the corners, pathologist, medical examiners, death investigators and the funeral homes and donation and how in collaboration we can do things because when I first started, we had with that position, heart valves and infants, especially under a year old were being denied that we were not able to recover that because the coroner needed this and needed that and there was no way to look at the heart and determine manner and cause of death.
And so I was like, well, what do we need? What do you need? And we were able to work together through collaboration and education that local could provide these things, these things they needed. We could draw the blood for them.
We could provide them with a cardiac, a password for work, pictures and slides and we can even return to heart remains. And so it was to get that trust. So prior to so Pam's, Pam's journey, you know, goes from, from before, you know, before she worked for Lopa, she was impacting those who had kidney disease and who needed, you know, that extension of that life to, to eye recoveries, to, you know, to working closely with me and our group in Lafayette to educating the community. And that's why we recognize we had a gym.
I have to say we knew that we had to hire Pam. We didn't know where, but we knew that and I can remember the conversations with Libby, myself and, and back then with Kelly, the CEO, I was like, I don't know where, but we've got to find a spot. Right. And, and, and I think, you know, everything happens for a reason.
But, you know, with Victor, your husband's move kind of forced, forced the hand to be creative on what, where else can we look and for an opportunity for you. And that corners, and I don't remember what it was called initially, but it was essentially a corners liaison and that, that connection between the corners is something we never had. We work closely with the corners, but we never had someone who was dedicated to seeing what they need and seeing that their needs are met and to maximize that opportunity. Yeah.
And just connecting you asked a simple question. Right. What do you need? And then from that it created this relationship where we could help each other.
And now we've got such a close relationship with pretty much every one of the 64 corners in this state. And, and that was all fostered on because of Pam and, and her tireless work. And then when I say tireless is there's, there's almost no one in Lopa that has a, an on button that's on for so long. Right.
Without ever saying no, like Pam and she travels everywhere and she talks to every corner. It's funny, you know, talking to these corners and these investigators, everyone knows Pam and that, and it's so, it's, you know, and you've got that and that drive has been there. And clearly your why has, has made such an impact beyond anything that you can imagine in 1997. You know, you've, you've, the impact went much, much further beyond Ryan even, you know, to hundreds and hundreds to thousands of people that would not have like saving organs or tissues because of you.
And so it just wanted to put that out there, Pam. But that's what that, but I'm telling you it couldn't happen without the team because what we asked for the team met and we can get it. Yes. What else, what else do they want?
What else do they need x-rays? Well, we can do that, you know, and so when they started, you know, like I said, it was just one child had ever been released and now since then that following year, we won the award for the most heart valve donors in the nation. And we have won that every year. And it's because of the trust and that the following through providing them with what they need.
And it's like, you know, for them to know that it is a cardiac forensic pediatric pathologist that does the heart path report, the pictures and slides and that help because they just don't have the equipment in Louisiana to do these things. So they, they have come accustomed to that and, and look at this year, even now the corners have, we've started pushing research the last three, four years and we've reached our goal of brain donation and release just recently. And you know, that you just can't measure. What a legacy.
Yeah. What a legacy for you, your career, Orion, just the cart legacy. And if you've been following social media, LOPA social media, donate life rose parade, social media, you've seen the sweet face and you've read about his story because you guys have recently decorated a floor graph, which is his image and organic materials because where is your baby going to be on New Year's Day? In New Year's Day, we are going to be standing proud with our chest out because Ryan will be rolling down Colorado Boulevard and Pasadena, California in the Rose Bowl parade along with John Clark Perry from Monroe, Louisiana and Elise from Metery, Louisiana.
And no better year than this year has spoke volumes for it to be and for Ryan to be a part. And that we get to share him with the world. And every family, every family deserves that and we will be representing them. And we get all the roses that are donated from Louisiana.
I get to be a part of that. And my family that's there and we get to put the rose donated and someone's memory are in their honor on this float for Louisiana. And we get to read the quote that the person put in memory or in honor of the person that they're donating this rose for. And to me, that is just an honor to be treasured, to be in control of.
And I hope I don't put none of the flowers upside down. I have to say, this is a fan section. You always stand out, Pam. Yes.
And that but to me, that in itself is just such an honor to have, to just let Louisiana know we are heard. We are all about making life happen. And each one of us get up each day. And many of us never go to sleep doing just that, making life happen, being there for the family, being there for the hospital, the workers.
You know, and bringing back recipients where hospitals can see the fruit of their labor, that phone call, that initiation of doing everything they can to support that family through that loved one's stay. And when the focus shifts, they help shift with that family to what the next steps are going to be and walking them through. And Sarah, of course, does that very, very well. And I'm just so proud to be a part of this family at LOCA.
Because I truly believe in our core purpose of making life happen. But I believe the highest one of that is integrity. And we all bring integrity to these families, to these recipients. That's who I'm fighting for is those recipients because each day, many die waiting when there was maybe a potential out there.
So most of the time it is just an educational issue that can clear up so much. So we put our boots on and that's what we do. And Pasadena is never going to be the same after the court family's passed through. That's right.
They will know Louisiana is in the house. And you get to share it with your daughter and your grandchildren. I've got a lot of cousins that are all flying in to be there. They've all bought their tickets.
And every day, it's going to be like the clamps and stuff. I am more excited. I'm not going to be about 20 of this. I love it.
It's a spectacular program. And LOCA sponsors a family who's been doing it for years. And then the image of a loved one is decorated in floor materials. It could be coffee, espresso, it's roasted at different levels.
Oh, it's just beautiful. And then that image is put on this float. And then the families have an opportunity to put flowers on the float itself, to be a part of the process and then to watch their loved one roll down. And so as we anticipate this coming, what is your heart doing?
How are you feeling going into that? Oh, I'm very excited and just really honored and definitely proud and really just excited and excited to meet other families from around the country that's there. And even the living donors, we have one coming from Louisiana. She's a young girl who at the age of 21, at least.
And I know we'll have the opportunity to have her on the podcast in the future, to give her a story. And I just think at 21, to make a decision to be a living donor for a co-workers husband, who is a firefighter, that's a big decision. And she's now 23. And so the funeral homes, and again, it just goes to show you the relationships that the funeral home is sponsoring her that she works for, whose wife was the wife of the recipient.
And right there, I know it's connections because funeral homes play a big part in donation also as the corners. And so being with them and being open and that this is the family's decision or the decedents already registered and a first person consent of what they want at the time of their death and honoring that and supporting the families and honoring those wishes is very important also. I love that. And I love that from Louisiana.
We'll have another family that's going to be represented. And that's the Perry family. And I know you feel close to them as well. Yes, yes, yes.
And we are excited too. And when we did the floor graph together, I think it opened up their eyes, definitely of what this all was. And the representative with the Rose Parade that helps with these floor graphs, Liz Fox. She can tell you from, I think from 1848 to today how things happen there.
But she helped guide and educate. And when you were talking about the coffee and the different spices and stuff, they gave me and the parries a jar. It's a base jar. And the lead.
And Joey, yes, they take the lead for me because that would not be a good thing when you're walking around. But when you lift that lead, they put everything that was used in the floor graph. And it's like, if you ever seen a sand, how you do different color sand in a glass. Yeah.
Well, that's what it is. But it's of all the different seeds and coffee and spices. And when you open it, I'm telling you, the aroma is just fantastic to just to get that. I don't know what is but a scent of what goes into this and how it comes together.
Because before that, I really kind of thought you only could use flowers and you only could use. But like for Ryan's eyes, they, and they're very particular about matching colors. And they want it to be exactly what the family sees. And the color of the eyes, Ryan had hazel eyes.
And so they did hydranias and did the colors and mixed the colors of different flowers and seeds and that to get the exact color. And it's just beautiful. Yeah. And the twinkle and this is special to Louisiana.
The twinkle in the eyes is a grain of rice. What better? What better? We are rice farmers.
That's right. What we did. And Ryan was very high in and for age and farming and conservation and, you know, we raised pigs and sheep and chickens and all of that for them to show. And you know, it just to me, it just comes back a hundred fold.
I love it. It's beautiful. You can see the floor graphs on our LOPA Facebook page and the donate life Rose Parade Facebook page and then you'll see it in the Rose Parade, yourself when it rolls. And we do need to say we talked about the Perry family.
John Clark Perry was a baby. He gave the gift of life. His family and his recipient family have been on this podcast too. And so the here's talking about the LSU Auburn game and it's the game of donation.
You get to see John Clark's little recipient. Right in the round. So amazing. Yes.
So cute. And you can see that as well. That one came out really well because he was a baby and had much hair. But I mean, just the likeness that was captured.
And his little hands by his chin. It just I'm telling you, you know, and I can't go without saying with Ryan, his best friend also died that day. They were on the four wheeler and Travis was also an organ tissue and eye donor and saved five lives that day and gave sight to two and a nurse from Lafayette general knew because Ryan died at the scene. So he was tissue, but Travis was flown to a hospital and the nurse from that hospital, I was picking out the flowers, actually for Ryan's funeral and at the flower shop and you know, you didn't have cell phones then people could track you.
And she called at that flower shop and the lady came and said, there's a call for you. And it was a nurse from Lafayette general and she says, Hey, thank you so much for saying yes to donation because you have the Smith family is also saying yes because y'all said yes. So that in itself just grew. And I just thought that how that happened, you know, and that it touched that nurse so much she had to call me to tell me that.
So many connections, so beautiful, so inspiring. And thank you for representing Louisiana. Thank you for sharing Ryan with us. Thank you for taking the Perry family with you on this journey out to California.
And we will see Ryan and John Clark on that float. Thanks, Pam. Thank y'all. I appreciate y'all on the gift of life.
We take a moment for mental health. Yeah, and this time we're talking about something I know nothing about social media. Yeah. It hurts my ears.
I know we're all on it, right? So we got to talk about it to communicate. Some of us use it really well. Some of us, you know, not so much.
Yeah. So we're going to talk about when using it can be really damaging for ourselves. So we're going to talk about what it means to reassure, seek. So when we're seeking reassurance from our friends, family, we all do it.
It's okay. Sometimes you need to go talk to your friend like, hey, you know, I'm thinking I want to make this move or I want to do this. And I need some help. Do you think it's a good idea or even assembly?
Do you think this outfit looks okay on me? We all do it. What? I was thinking, does this make my butt look big?
Exactly. Sorry. No, it's true. Edit that out.
It's just why. Yeah. So we all do it. We all reassure, seek.
But when does it become damaging? So when does it become a problem? That's when it's really frequent and when you're dependent on it. So that's when you're asking people all the time, it's your only form of validation is the reassurance.
So that's when it's a problem. Sounds exhausting. Yeah. But we all go through it.
And then you've got social media where everybody is posting things saying, giving their opinion, showing their lavish vacations, what have you. And then it can become really difficult because not only are we comparing ourselves, but then we start engaging and posting for reassurance. So that's where it's the problem. I can see I have a very close friend who if he doesn't have a hundred likes for everything and he posts, he gets upset.
He's like, all right, I'm over a hundred likes. It's like a big deal. And then it's a vicious cycle because then it's okay. So you got as many likes as you needed for validation and reassurance.
So then the next one has to be better. Yes. Or you have to every if you don't, then your day's ruined. That's a problem.
You know, we shouldn't that shouldn't be where we seek our reassurance. Social media is not the place where you should go for that. But it happens. So kind of how do we break that cycle then?
How do we stop doing it where it's damaging, especially for, you know, women and body image? Like I think that's a huge one, especially for young girls on social media. Filters. I mean, it's right.
Everything's a filter. I've come with somebody like that. And it's okay. But it's just not really.
I feel sorry sometimes. I have a lot of sympathy for people who every, like if you look at the last 10 pictures and everyone has filters and different things that they've done edited, just, you know, that's exactly I feel like they're just looking seeking some reassurance. Every shirt and validation, if that's the only place you're getting that and if it's dependent on that, then that's where it's a problem. So how do we break the cycle?
If we're going to post, we should engage in meaningful posting. So you should ask yourself, why am I posting this? What's the purpose? What am I trying to share?
I think before you post. I think that a lot when I'm scrolling through it because I enjoy it because I get to see updates of other people that don't get to see every day. Sure. And that's why we keep up with each other's children and I like it.
But then sometimes there's a, you know, an odd post in there and like, oh, did they mean to do that? Like, oh, man. Are they posting for acceptance? Yeah.
Or are you posting for likes? Because that's where your validation comes through. And also, what are the consequences? So what are you trying to get out of this?
If it's likes, maybe that's not the reason you should be posting and sharing. Maybe you should go for more meaningful things like sharing your life with others in a realistic way. And effectively address if you recognize that this is a problem, if this is kind of hitting home for you, address it. So delete the apps that are causing you harms.
Delete the things that you are going to reassurance for if it's the only thing. Delete. Just get, you don't need it. You know, call a friend, look for a connection because that's where you find a true reassurance.
And that's when you trust somebody, that's who you should be going to. So get rid of the, you know, the negative toxic ways of reassurance and go for the ones that are tried and true. And everybody online your friends, like, you know, your friends are because they love you through your highs and lows, right? Right.
That's who you call. Yeah. And so whether you have to go to therapy because this is a true self esteem issue or you're struggling with who you are and finding yourself, seek out professional help, have self compassion. I say it constantly is podcast.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Find ways that you like yourself and focus on those or, you know, write in a gratitude journal, something that you're grateful for weekly. You know, there's so many different ways that we can reassure ourselves. Minus, minus three exercise.
Yeah. You know, I know it's self reassurance, but like I feel good when I exercise, whether it's tennis or the crossfit that I do, I feel like I've accomplished something. So like it gives me that gratification and I guess my own reassurance. You're reassuring yourself that you're healthy and you're engaging in a lifestyle that you Yeah.
This is what I want. This is who I want to be. Yeah. Instead of, you know, like going to the gym and then posting it to the other people, reassuring validate you.
Good job, Joe. You're at the gym again. There you go. Good deal.
Maybe you have a topic you'd like Sarah to cover. All you have to do is email us info at the gifted life.org. And our question and answer segment today. Why would corners ever deny donation?
That's the question on the table. That's the question. So of course we need to bring in our resident corner expert Pam Cartback in for that answer. So why would corners deny?
Well, there's many reasons. Definitely the main reason would be for the men or in calls of death because when it's an unnatural death, the corner has jurisdiction over the death because they're going to fill out the death certificate. And as we know, in many of these scenarios and deaths, homicide or sudden death or people are found dead and there's no explanation. So it is their job and by law, they have to do an investigation to determine that men are in calls.
So if they feel there's interference that they would not be able to meet that, then they would say no. And in fact, in the beginning, when we first started with this position, that was the answer they were giving was no because it was a homicide or it was child abuse or it was unexplained. So then we began to say, well, what do you need? And they were like, well, we need blood.
Well, I can't we, Loba can provide that for you and we can provide photographs and we can provide x-rays and scans. And so we began to work together in collaboration because there should never be an interference with men or in calls of death because again, the family wants to know what happened to their loved ones and for many reasons. So the corners began to build that trust and the relationships began to grow. And so today that there may be some restrictions to donations such as with gunshot wounds to the head, do not go above the neck, certain injuries stay away from that organ.
And one thing they have really trusted with Loba is when these things are found, maybe something during recovery, we contact the corner immediately and let them know what was found and see how we can proceed. And so that trust is built to where they are confident that we will definitely inform them, keep them informed and provide them with the information and the items they need to do their investigation. And if I can take that a step further, not only has Pam built up the relationships between Loba and the corners to establish that denials would not take place, they have also now established what is known as the MDI log which is a way for the corners to provide referrals to Loba on some tissue don't or some potential tissue don't. Never make it to the hospital and corners are investigating.
So just to give you a little kudos to Pam, that all comes from the relationship that is built there from especially between Pam and her group and the corners there. So we have come a long way from denials years back to now, they are not denying and they are even referring to the potential tissue don't. So that is a long way we have come. And to further that, they also do not have MDI log either send an email of the deaths that are outside the hospital because how those conversations came is families would ask.
Well, nobody ever asked me about my dad or my child or my, and I am like, well, did they die at the hospital? No. That sparked the conversation to start with the corners and then they found it, excuse me, MDI log like you said, Joey and said, hey, Pam, I think I have something here that we can do and they call in, they fax in, they, you know, and now starting 2022, they've even put a challenge out there for an award each year that will be passed on the highest percentage that are reported outside hospital deaths to help grow the tissue donation. And the corner subcommittee that we have at LOPA that works with the corner association and many of the corners and death investigators have taken on as our challenge this year for 2022 is how do we develop and how do we refer more outside hospital deaths so every family gets the opportunity for that.
Yeah. All right. We're doing big and better things always looking for new opportunities. Thanks, Pam.
Have a question for us. Why don't you give us a call 504-648-3477. In every episode of the gifted life, we honor a hero. And today's hero is Ryan Cort and of course, no better person to tell Ryan's story than his mama, Pam Cort.
Ryan Scott Cort was full of courage and hope. He was confident in history of expectation for a firm assurance and humility to value others above himself. Ryan impacted the lives of each person he touched. He was selfless in giving, loved all and worshipped one.
Ryan brought a message of courage and hope to his classmates along with his community. The community of our small town was given courage, hope and the strength from the impact Ryan displayed and loving deeply. To be involved in this celebration this year of this breathtaking courage to hope captures the heart of our mission for Ryan. To be a family member and join with others to represent millions touched by our organization and our donation, words fail to describe the feeling.
As Ryan's family, we have also dedicated a rose to this float in the memory of Travis Smith. Ryan's friend who also died with Ryan and was an organization I don't. Two boys living the country boy life. Ryan's verse for his standard of living was John 1513.
There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friend. And now we pause and say thank you to Ryan for the gift of life. And that is episode 177 of the gifted life. So thanks to Pam Cart and especially for sharing Ryan's story with us and I can't wait to see him coming down Colorado Boulevard in Pasadena on that float.
I can't wait to hear all about it when she gets back. Such a treasure. So be looking out for that for the rose parade. I want to thank you for listening guys.
And remember you can always register as an organ, I and tissue donor anytime register me.org and the best place to find us. Tell your friends it's on our website the gifted life that work. You can listen to any of our episodes on our website or anywhere you like to listen whether it's I Heart Radio, Apple or Google podcasts. And remember to rate review and subscribe so that others can find the podcast on social media or Facebook page is called the get to life podcast.
You can also follow us on Twitter and Instagram at giftedlifepod. Our ask is that you share what you learned here today and that you go out and do something you would normally do to help us make life happen. Have a good one.