The Same But Different

Understanding sameness means you find or connect with the things in you that you share with another. Being different means no matter how similar you are - in values, upbringing, etc. - there will still be things that have differed in your lives and experience. When something (job, relationship) fails due to these differences, it provokes a greater understanding of how to respect all sorts of other differences that may never make sense. If you are someone who likes order, organization and clarity, it may disturb you to find that when you look for similarities and stereotypes you still cannot understand completely what's happening with others. Yes, common threads can mean common sense. They can also remove you from the education you get being present to someone who is different in ways that intimidate you. Worse yet, when you try to find too many similarities so as to avoid discomfort, you don't benefit from finding ways to think for yourself. When you think for yourself, you are more liberated to avoid generalizations and even the need to stereotype. What follows is more openness and vulnerability to new experiences and new people. Reservations and stereotypes block love. Consciousness has needed to replace my bullshit and too-smart-for-my-own-good need to categorize to understand. I DO understand...that I DON'T understand.