The Shame Game

Shame and Addiction. We all deal with being addicted to things: Social media food drinking soda our phones in general - we unlock them 1,500 times a week work being lazy porn drugs pharmaceuticals The list is endless. My own personal battle with addiction and its subsequent shame was with porn, and I got started as early as 12 years old. Shame tells us that we are unworthy, keeps us from community and vulnerability, and helps to keep us entrapped in the circle of a habit that does not serve our greater good. The statistics behind the porn industry are mind-blowing, but this isn't the only addiction that seeks to destroy humanity's power core: our ability to connect fully and deeply. Anytime we deal with actions that cause us to feel shame. we hole up, refuse to take risks, and engage in behaviors that we know do us no good. We joke about them, make light of them, and hang out with other people who have the same addictions. No one is alone. We all just feel shame, and therefore feel alone, as if no one else on the planet is suffering from addiction. Addiction is as simple as engaging in an act, an act that consumes your time, resources, and life energy; an act that causes your brain to increase dopamine production. As long as the dopamine is being produced, the act feels good, and until the dopamine stops, we typically feel no remorse. Then shame kicks in. "Why did I do that?" "I need to stop doing this." "It's okay, so many other people are doing it." "I'm not THAT bad." Anything taking your time, resources, and energy that is not causing you to live a more fulfilled existence and change the world by changing yourself is quite possibly an addiction, especially if you seek out the activity due to some trauma that is buried deep underneath the surface. I discuss my own battle, shame, and overcoming in Episode 22 of Superhero Academy.