The story of Lauren: Spirituality in Recovery

Continuing our “Spirituality in Recovery” finale series, we share the story of Lauren—a journey back to God’s care after years of self-will run wild.Raised in a Catholic household, Lauren followed the traditions that were expected of her, but never truly felt connected to God or the church. After her confirmation at fourteen, she stopped attending services altogether. Around the same time, relentless bullying over her weight left deep emotional wounds that would shape the course of her life. In an attempt to gain control, she developed an eating disorder that quickly progressed and consumed her.When she discovered drugs, she found the relief and escape she had been searching for. Soon after came her first serious relationship—one deeply intertwined with addiction. The chaos of that relationship intensified her using and pulled her further away from herself, to the point where simply finishing high school became a struggle.Despite everything, Lauren somehow made it into college. But within months, the progression of her eating disorder and the unmanageability of her life brought her back home. She began working and was introduced to opiates, which would ultimately become her drug of choice. While attending community college, her academic record became a pattern of withdrawals and incompletes, reflecting the growing chaos beneath the surface.Everything began to shift when she met a man who did not use drugs. For the first time, she saw the possibility of a different life. Encouraged by his support, Lauren returned to school and eventually earned both her bachelor’s and master’s degrees—all while convincing herself she could still control her occasional using. She married that man, built a family with him, and had two children.But after her last pregnancy, a visit to the dentist reopened the door she had never truly closed. She sought opiates under the guise of treating pain, though deep down she already knew what she wanted. During that time, obtaining large quantities of prescription drugs was alarmingly easy, and her addiction quickly spiraled beyond control. Lauren became so skilled at hiding her disease that when she finally admitted the truth, her husband had no idea she had been using at all.Eventually, Lauren surrendered to her addiction and entered recovery—and she has never looked back since.But recovery did not mean life suddenly became easy. After more than a decade clean, Lauren found herself on another painful journey driven by self-will, fear, and emotional exhaustion. An undiagnosed mental illness, combined with the struggle to find proper medication, brought her to her knees once again.This time, however, she did not face it alone.By leaning fully into her program, her sponsor, her support network, and her Higher Power, Lauren found a new level of surrender and trust. Through some of the darkest moments of her recovery—even with 15 years clean—she discovered what it truly means to rely on God instead of herself. Today, her relationship with God is no longer based on obligation or routine, but on daily connection, faith, and trust.Lauren’s story is a powerful reminder that recovery is not just about putting down the drugs—it is about learning how to surrender, how to trust, and how to live life on life’s terms with grace, honesty, and faith in a power greater than herself.