EPISODE · Jun 18, 2026 · 43 MIN
The Virtuous Woman Trap (and Why You Feel So Damn Empty) with Dr. Julie Merriman
from Transforming 45 · host Lisa Boate
What if your burnout isn’t about doing too much…but about believing your value comes from being needed? This week on Transforming 45, Lisa sits down with Dr. Julie Merriman—PhD, Certified Sex Counselor, trauma specialist, and creator of Soul Joy™—for a conversation that goes way deeper than “self-care.” They unpack the virtuous woman trap: the lifelong conditioning that teaches women to over-function, over-give, and override their own needs… until they don’t even feel themselves anymore. This episode is about nervous system survival, emotional numbness, identity loss—and what it actually takes to come home to yourself again. 🎧 New episodes drop every Thursday Listen on all podcast platforms + YouTube In this episode we talk about: The “good girl” conditioning that wires women for burnout Why high-achieving women feel empty (even when they’re successful) What “functional freeze” actually looks like in real life The moment Lisa realized: “I don’t feel my feet” Why you can’t think your way out of a feeling problem How disconnection impacts intimacy, desire, and relationships The truth about masculinity, safety, and emotional regulation Empty nest grief and identity loss in midlife What it means to “have a homecoming” back to yourself Key Takeaways: You are not broken. Your nervous system adapted to keep you safe. But the life you want? It requires more than survival—it requires coming back into your body. Connet with Julie Merriman: Dr. Julie Merriman, Ph.D., LPC-S, CSC is a counselor educator, author, speaker, and clinician with over 25 years of experience helping high-achieving women break free from burnout and self-sacrifice. She is the creator of Soul Joy™, host of the Compassion Fatigue Cure podcast, and author of: In Pursuit of Soul Joy Are We Gonna Have Sex or What? (Spring 2026) Her work blends neuroscience, somatics, and real-life application to help women reconnect to desire, identity, and pleasure in midlife. 🔗 Learn more: https://juliemerrimanphd.com 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.juliemerriman/ 🎧 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@drjuliemerriman 🔥 In This Episode, We Talk About:💥 Key Takeaway👤 About Julie Merriman🎙️ Let’s Stay Connected🌐 Website: https://www.liberatedmenopause.ca📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lboate📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/leaninfindyourwayhome/👥 Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/245092311417467📩 Email: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What this episode covers
What if your burnout isn’t about doing too much…but about believing your value comes from being needed? This week on Transforming 45, Lisa sits down with Dr. Julie Merriman—PhD, Certified Sex Counselor, trauma specialist, and creator of Soul Joy™—for a conversation that goes way deeper than “self-care.” They unpack the virtuous woman trap: the lifelong conditioning that teaches women to over-function, over-give, and override their own needs… until they don’t even feel themselves anymore. This episode is about nervous system survival, emotional numbness, identity loss—and what it actually takes to come home to yourself again. 🎧 New episodes drop every Thursday Listen on all podcast platforms + YouTube In this episode we talk about: The “good girl” conditioning that wires women for burnout Why high-achieving women feel empty (even when they’re successful) What “functional freeze” actually looks like in real life The moment Lisa realized: “I don’t feel my feet” Why you can’t think your way out of a feeling problem How disconnection impacts intimacy, desire, and relationships The truth about masculinity, safety, and emotional regulation Empty nest grief and identity loss in midlife What it means to “have a homecoming” back to yourself Key Takeaways: You are not broken. Your nervous system adapted to keep you safe. But the life you want? It requires more than survival—it requires coming back into your body. Connet with Julie Merriman: Dr. Julie Merriman, Ph.D., LPC-S, CSC is a counselor educator, author, speaker, and clinician with over 25 years of experience helping high-achieving women break free from burnout and self-sacrifice. She is the creator of Soul Joy™, host of the Compassion Fatigue Cure podcast, and author of: In Pursuit of Soul Joy Are We Gonna Have Sex or What? (Spring 2026) Her work blends neuroscience, somatics, and real-life application to help women reconnect to desire, identity, and pleasure in midlife. 🔗 Learn more: https://juliemerrimanphd.com 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.juliemerriman/ 🎧 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@drjuliemerriman 🔥 In This Episode, We Talk About:💥 Key Takeaway👤 About Julie Merriman🎙️ Let’s Stay Connected🌐 Website: https://www.liberatedmenopause.ca📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lboate📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/leaninfindyourwayhome/👥 Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/245092311417467📩 Email: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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The Virtuous Woman Trap (and Why You Feel So Damn Empty) with Dr. Julie Merriman
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