The Weight a Birthday Carries: Mother Wounds and Grief

Birthdays are often seen as something simple. A day to celebrate, to feel loved, to be surrounded by people who recognize your presence. But for some of us, birthdays carry more than that. They hold memory, absence, and the quiet awareness of what was there and what wasn’t.In this episode of Born Tired: Where Survival Meets Healing, I reflect on what it means to move through life with a complicated relationship to being celebrated. Not just on birthdays, but in the deeper sense of being seen, valued, and held in moments that were meant to center you. When those experiences are inconsistent or missing, the impact doesn’t stay in childhood. It shapes how safe it feels to receive attention, how natural it feels to be recognized, and how your body responds to being seen at all.I share my personal experience of growing up without that consistent sense of being celebrated, and how that has followed me into adulthood. The tension between recognizing love in the present and still feeling the urge to withdraw from it. The way those early experiences shaped my relationship with closeness, attention, and self-worth.This episode is also layered with the reality of being born on Mother’s Day, and what it means to carry a complicated relationship with motherhood while stepping into that role myself. I reflect on emotional neglect, the mother wound, and the experience of being the scapegoat, and how those dynamics shape not just how we see others, but how we come to see ourselves.At the same time, I speak to what it looks like to create something different. To move through these moments with awareness, to understand where the discomfort comes from, and to allow yourself to stay present instead of disappearing. Not forcing yourself to feel something you don’t, but making space for something new to exist alongside what has always been there.Because healing doesn’t erase what happened. It changes how you relate to it. And sometimes, that shift begins in small moments, like allowing yourself to remain present in a day that once felt easier to get through than to experience.Gentle Reminder:This podcast includes conversations about trauma, family dynamics, mental health, estrangement, eating disorders, and lived experiences. Listener discretion is advised.🤍 Support the podcast:Buy Me a Coffee — https://buymeacoffee.com/mzd5yc89kkk📌 Follow me:Instagram: @borntiredpodcastThreads: @borntiredpodcastTikTok: @borntiredpodcastSubstack: https://substack.com/@borntiredpodcastCredits:Written & narrated by Eirene TorresAudio production by Carlos TorresOriginal music by Carlos TorresDisclaimer:Born Tired is a personal storytelling podcast based on lived experience. This content is not a substitute for professional mental health care and does not provide medical or clinical advice. If you are struggling or in crisis, please consider reaching out to a qualified mental health professional or local support services.