This Is What Starting Over Again Looks Like After Grief | GRAFT with Jane Openshaw

TRIGGER WARNING: talk of a physical attack that resulted in a death. On 4 April 2012, Jane Openshaw’s husband, Phil Sheriff, attended a corporate event in London. Hours later, he was fighting for his life after being attacked. Four days after that, he was gone.What followed was chaos, shock, the Old Bailey, a national campaign, a brutal appeal, and the daily reality of raising two children while navigating grief in its rawest form.In this powerful conversation, Jane sits down with Ben to share the truth of that week, the courtroom battle, the online abuse, the Bottle Stop campaign, antidepressants, parenting through trauma, and eventually — years later — finding love again with someone who understood loss the way she did.This is a story about survival, anger, resilience, rebuilding, and choosing to move forward, not “on.”🎧 Listen as we discuss…(00:05) The night of the corporate event — and the first calls that didn’t feel right(00:06:30) Searching hospitals, calling colleagues, and piecing everything together alone(00:13:36) The final moments (00:16:10) Facing telling their children (00:19:06) The Old Bailey trial(00:25:11) The appeal, the crash afterwards, and the year she was “on her knees”(00:28:50) Parenting two kids with two entirely different grief responses(00:30:30) What actually helped with her grief(00:35:30) Online cruelty and the moments that cut deepest(00:38:15) Bottle Stop: the campaign to remove late-night glass in bars and clubs(00:44:19) Meeting someone new and learning to love again(00:48:42) Letting go of anger without ever letting go of Phil(00:51:06) Jane’s advice for anyone frozen at the kitchen table with no idea how to continueKEY TAKEAWAYSYou don’t move on — you move forward. Grief leaves scars, not blank spaces.Shock carries you, but it drops you hard. The crash after the trial was the darkest point.Two kids, two griefs. Children don’t grieve the same way — and that’s okay.Campaigning can heal — and wound. Bottle Stop gave Jane purpose, but also backlash.Love doesn’t replace love. You can love the person you lost and love the person you meet.Take life an hour at a time. On the worst days, an hour is enough.GUESTJane Openshaw - mother, campaigner, and founder of Bottle Stop, a grassroots movement calling for the removal of glass in late-night venues after her husband, Phil, was killed in an unprovoked attack with a broken bottle in 2012. Jane now speaks openly about grief, trauma, justice, and rebuilding life while keeping Phil’s memory alive.