EPISODE · Sep 18, 2020 · 28 MIN
Tiffany Hoehne
from Tears & Tulle Talk · host Gina Bell
Tiffany wore the original rainbow tulle skirt during Tears & Tulle Movement Season 1, Week 8. 🎤IN TIFFANY’S WORDS.... I was 26. In the past 12 months, I had had my second child, moved across the country, experienced multiple “unexplainable” health concerns, enlisted government assistance to feed my babies, dealt with isolation in my new home, moved back across the country to live in Grandma’s basement, and watched as my husband did everything in his power to find a full-time job and…..failed. I was physically and emotionally depleted. I had assumed that after grad school, we would be well on our way to the American Dream—house in the suburbs, job with benefits, security and stability. Instead, my husband was getting nothing but local freelance jobs, we were stuck in Grandma’s basement, and as my grandma’s health declined, my mom and I became her caregivers. That lasted for 4 years. I had my third baby during those years. The week his first tooth broke through, my grandma lost her front tooth. The month he started eating solids, we started blending her food. Within weeks of taking his first steps, my grandma lost most of her mobility. Parenthood is hard, but caregiving was next level hard. It was excruciating at times. I wondered why God was silent and why we couldn’t seem to move forward. If only I could have seen. 16 years later, though: I see. I see that not having housing expenses for 4 years gave us the capital to start our own business, and access a better life than we imagined. I see that my extended emotional turmoil gave me the drive to become an expert on emotions, and to help anyone I could to not feel so alone. I see that learning caregiving taught me empathy and boundaries, and that I’m stronger than I ever felt. I see that feeling inadequate in those days taught me to fight for my feelings of enough. Every. Day. I see that the hard things have become my wings. At first, they were so painful to grow! They were heavy on my shoulders. I didn’t understand, and I didn’t want them. But now, I do understand. And now, I fly. Visit Tiffany's super fun Instagram page at @redlicoricelife www.instagram.com/redlicoricelife
What this episode covers
Tiffany wore the original rainbow tulle skirt during Tears & Tulle Movement Season 1, Week 8. 🎤IN TIFFANY’S WORDS.... I was 26. In the past 12 months, I had had my second child, moved across the country, experienced multiple “unexplainable” health concerns, enlisted government assistance to feed my babies, dealt with isolation in my new home, moved back across the country to live in Grandma’s basement, and watched as my husband did everything in his power to find a full-time job and…..failed. I was physically and emotionally depleted. I had assumed that after grad school, we would be well on our way to the American Dream—house in the suburbs, job with benefits, security and stability. Instead, my husband was getting nothing but local freelance jobs, we were stuck in Grandma’s basement, and as my grandma’s health declined, my mom and I became her caregivers. That lasted for 4 years. I had my third baby during those years. The week his first tooth broke through, my grandma lost her front tooth. The month he started eating solids, we started blending her food. Within weeks of taking his first steps, my grandma lost most of her mobility. Parenthood is hard, but caregiving was next level hard. It was excruciating at times. I wondered why God was silent and why we couldn’t seem to move forward. If only I could have seen. 16 years later, though: I see. I see that not having housing expenses for 4 years gave us the capital to start our own business, and access a better life than we imagined. I see that my extended emotional turmoil gave me the drive to become an expert on emotions, and to help anyone I could to not feel so alone. I see that learning caregiving taught me empathy and boundaries, and that I’m stronger than I ever felt. I see that feeling inadequate in those days taught me to fight for my feelings of enough. Every. Day. I see that the hard things have become my wings. At first, they were so painful to grow! They were heavy on my shoulders. I didn’t understand, and I didn’t want them. But now, I do understand. And now, I fly. Visit Tiffany's super fun Instagram page at @redlicoricelife www.instagram.com/redlicoricelife
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Tiffany Hoehne
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