Toni Laites - Love Island Healed My Toxic Dating Patterns episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 4, 2026 · 54 MIN

Toni Laites - Love Island Healed My Toxic Dating Patterns

from How To Fail With Elizabeth Day · host Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment

Toni Laites made history last year as the first American to win Love Island, but her journey to the villa was anything but ordinary. Discovered in Las Vegas working as a cabana girl by the show’s creative director, Toni was persuaded to fly 6,000 miles to Mallorca. The rest, as they say, is history. But you don’t need to be a Love Island superfan to love this episode. Toni is funny, emotionally intelligent and disarmingly honest. She opens up about living with the chronic illness Ulcerative Colitis, her pattern of choosing the wrong men in the past, working through anxious attachment and the hard-won strength it takes to forgive yourself. This is a conversation about resilience, self-awareness and what it really means to back yourself - even when the odds (and the public vote) are against you. ✨ IN THIS EPISODE: 03:18 Vegas Sales to Villa Casting 05:36 Saying Yes to Love Island 07:21 Life Inside the Villa 08:33 Votes, Outcasts and Forgiveness 10:57 The Big Three Friendship 14:18 Health Scare and Ulcerative Colitis 28:10 Tourist In London 28:43 Toxic Dating Patterns 32:22 Pressure On Her Relationship 34:57 Fame And Social Media 37:34 Family And Attachment 44:28 Self Criticism And Hate 49:44 Plan For The Future 💬 QUOTES TO REMEMBER: There is value in doing nothing and taking a step back and waiting for good things to come. I always say not all disabilities are visible and people don't really understand what that's like. 🔗 LINKS + MENTIONS: Join the How To Fail community: https://howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Elizabeth’s Substack: https://theelizabethday.substack.com/ 📚 WANT MORE? Olivia Attwood - on heartbreak, public scrutiny and building a successful career after Love Island. Jessel Taank - on infertility, identity and The Real Housewives of New York. 💌 LOVE THIS EPISODE? Subscribe on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts Leave a 5⭐ review – it helps more people discover these stories 👋 Follow How To Fail & Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday TikTok: @howtofailpod Podcast Instagram: @howtofailpod Website: www.elizabethday.org Elizabeth and Toni answer listener questions in our subscriber series, Failing with Friends. Join our community of subscribers here: https://howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Have a failure you’re trying to work through for Elizabeth to discuss? Click here to get in touch: howtofailpod.com Production & Post Production Coordinator: Eric Ryan Engineer: Matias Torres Assistant Producer: Shania Manderson Senior Producer: Hannah Talbot Executive Producer: Alex Lawless How to Fail is an Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment Production. Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Toni Laites made history last year as the first American to win Love Island, but her journey to the villa was anything but ordinary. Discovered in Las Vegas working as a cabana girl by the show’s creative director, Toni was persuaded to fly 6,000 miles to Mallorca. The rest, as they say, is history. But you don’t need to be a Love Island superfan to love this episode. Toni is funny, emotionally intelligent and disarmingly honest. She opens up about living with the chronic illness Ulcerative Colitis, her pattern of choosing the wrong men in the past, working through anxious attachment and the hard-won strength it takes to forgive yourself. This is a conversation about resilience, self-awareness and what it really means to back yourself - even when the odds (and the public vote) are against you. ✨ IN THIS EPISODE: 03:18 Vegas Sales to Villa Casting 05:36 Saying Yes to Love Island 07:21 Life Inside the Villa 08:33 Votes, Outcasts and Forgiveness 10:57 The Big Three Friendship 14:18 Health Scare and Ulcerative Colitis 28:10 Tourist In London 28:43 Toxic Dating Patterns 32:22 Pressure On Her Relationship 34:57 Fame And Social Media 37:34 Family And Attachment 44:28 Self Criticism And Hate 49:44 Plan For The Future 💬 QUOTES TO REMEMBER: There is value in doing nothing and taking a step back and waiting for good things to come. I always say not all disabilities are visible and people don't really understand what that's like. 🔗 LINKS + MENTIONS: Join the How To Fail community: https://howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Elizabeth’s Substack: https://theelizabethday.substack.com/ 📚 WANT MORE? Olivia Attwood - on heartbreak, public scrutiny and building a successful career after Love Island. Jessel Taank - on infertility, identity and The Real Housewives of New York. 💌 LOVE THIS EPISODE? Subscribe on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts Leave a 5⭐ review – it helps more people discover these stories 👋 Follow How To Fail & Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday TikTok: @howtofailpod Podcast Instagram: @howtofailpod Website: www.elizabethday.org Elizabeth and Toni answer listener questions in our subscriber series, Failing with Friends. Join our community of subscribers here: https://howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Have a failure you’re trying to work through for Elizabeth to discuss? Click here to get in touch: howtofailpod.com Production & Post Production Coordinator: Eric Ryan Engineer: Matias Torres Assistant Producer: Shania Manderson Senior Producer: Hannah Talbot Executive Producer: Alex Lawless How to Fail is an Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment Production. Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

NOW PLAYING

Toni Laites - Love Island Healed My Toxic Dating Patterns

0:00 54:51

No transcript for this episode yet

We transcribe on demand. Request one and we'll notify you when it's ready — usually under 10 minutes.

Big Old Life: Heather Blackbird interviews people on planet earth. Heather Blackbird loves asking questions. This podcast is a learning experience. Join me, Heather Blackbird, as I talk to people about their lives. Frequency of new episodes is a little all over the place and I'm learning as I go. Big Old Life is a small way of talking about the vastness of life, one person at a time. If you are reading this or found this podcast it's probably because someone you know gave you a link to it. :) Explicit Tales Of A Superstar DJ The Insomniac Spun seemingly out of nowhere from her complacent life in the corporate world, turned seemingly overnight from 16-Hour shift work and into the life of a literally starving artist and working musician, The Protagonist navigates her supposed rise to fame and superstardom on a journey through spiritual awakening, coming-of-age, and intimate self-realization--guided by an omnipresent force and equipped with the power of love, magic, and music. {Enter The Multiverse.} [The Festival Project] The Festival Project, Inc.™ is a multidimensional multimedia platform which encompasses exploratory and artistic social personifications and expressions on cosmic theory, spirituality, growth, health & wellness, philosophy and theoretic dynamics in entertainment such as music, design, film, television, radio, dance and festival culture, art, fashion, literature, and science. The Festival Project™ and its subsidiary Non-Profit, The Collective Complex © aims to challenge modern artistic and philosop Explicit Bitcoin Is Dead Trey Carson Welcome to Bitcoin is Dead, the ultimate Bitcoin variety show where host Trey takes you on a journey through the ever-evolving world of Bitcoin. Each episode brings new personalities, fascinating locations, and insightful conversations with politicians, educators, and innovators shaping the future of Bitcoin. Whether you're a seasoned Bitcoiner or just starting your journey, tune in for thought-provoking discussions, unique perspectives, and a deep dive into the ideas and people driving the Bitcoin revolution. Explicit The Sacred +Profane Podcast nephtaragrace The Sacred + Profane Podcast is a provocative conversation dedicated to cementing a better future for all. We specialize in unpacking the nuances of what is considered sacred and profane, particularly focusing on sex, death, and all that pertains to the circle of life. Our aim in focusing on such ”taboo” subject matter is to demystify what is unconscious, bring to light what has been known for centuries as ”the occult,” and empower the rapid transformation that is occurring on the Planet. Explicit

Frequently Asked Questions

How long is this episode of How To Fail With Elizabeth Day?

This episode is 54 minutes long.

When was this How To Fail With Elizabeth Day episode published?

This episode was published on March 4, 2026.

What is this episode about?

Toni Laites made history last year as the first American to win Love Island, but her journey to the villa was anything but ordinary. Discovered in Las Vegas working as a cabana girl by the show’s creative director, Toni was persuaded to fly 6,000...

Can I download this How To Fail With Elizabeth Day episode?

Yes, you can download this episode by clicking the download button on the episode player, or subscribe to the podcast in your preferred podcast app for automatic downloads.
URL copied to clipboard!