TOP GOLF IS A VIDEO GAME FOR DRUNKS + Throwback

Chris Akin is back from a bender at Top Golf, proving that “active lifestyle” just means hitting balls at digital targets while inhaling mac and cheese. From “Hitting Ass” on the scoreboard to the literal physical breakdown of Chris’s right foot, we’re exposing why the suburbs are more dangerous than a mosh pit. Get the unfiltered, uncensored truth by joining the inner circle now. STOP BEING A CONSUMER AND START BEING AN INSIDER: https://classicmetalshow.locals.com – Top Golf is just Angry Birds with more expensive beer and worse swings.– “Hitting Ass”: How Chris hacked the leaderboard and offended every suburban dad in the building.– The Cassata Cake Conspiracy: Why Chris refuses to eat like a normal human being at a birthday party.– Medical Mystery: Chris’s foot literally snaps while walking to his car, and he blames “the ice.”– Breaking the Hermit Cycle: Why everyone is shocked Chris actually left the house two months in a row. Van Halen F.U.C.K. Box Set: https://amzn.to/4l600Lh Metallica LOAD Vinyl: https://amzn.to/4fjGnOw Ghost Papa Emeritus IV Funko: https://amzn.to/4fk5sJr CMS Winter Skull Cap: https://classicmetalshow.creator-spring.com/listing/cms-winter-skull-cap ...And Other Things I Should Not Say... by Chris Akin: https://amzn.to/48v3YVf (As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.) GET A SHOUTOUT FROM CHRIS: https://www.cameo.com/chrisakin READ THE UNFILTERED BLOG: CATCH THE CHAOS LIVE: Every Saturday night from 9 PM - 3 AM EST at www.theclassicmetalshow.com. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cmspn.substack.com/subscribe