Toxic Perfectionism at Church | An Interview with Justin Dyer

Justin Dyer received BA in Marriage and Family from Brigham Young University and a Master’s and Ph.D. in Human Development and Family Studies from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. He also has expertise in statistics. Justin is a professor of religion at BYU, teaching religion and family classes, and focuses his research on religion and mental health. He has published over 70 peer-reviewed studies in scholarly journals. Justin has served in various Church callings including full-time missionary in Brazil, Primary teacher, early morning Seminary teacher, Young Men leader, and bishop. He currently serves as a ward missionary. Most importantly, Justin has been married for 22 years and has six children whom he loves to inundate with the most recent, intriguing research graphs he has created. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Justin talks about toxic perfectionism, particularly within the context of Latter-day Saints. He shares his research findings, which challenge the common belief that Latter-day Saints are inherently more prone to toxic perfectionism than individuals from other religious backgrounds. He explains that while 12% of Latter-day Saint youth exhibit high levels of toxic perfectionism, this figure is lower than the 20% found among atheists and agnostics, suggesting that toxic perfectionism is a broader human tendency rather than a specific issue tied to religious beliefs. The conversation delves into the nuances of perfectionism, distinguishing between healthy striving for high standards and the detrimental effects of toxic perfectionism, which can lead to feelings of worthlessness and shame. Justin emphasizes the importance of fostering a secure attachment to God, which can mitigate feelings of toxic perfectionism. He highlights the role of parents and leaders in creating an environment of love and support, rather than shame, to help youth navigate their identities and self-worth. The episode also addresses the challenges faced by LGBTQ youth within religious contexts, advocating for a compassionate approach that maintains the value of religious teachings while providing necessary support. The conversation underscores the significance of identity and the need for leaders and parents to remind youth of their inherent worth as children of God, encouraging them to strive for high standards without the burden of toxic perfectionism. 01:41 – Introduction of Justin Dyer and Research Focus 02:56 – Exploring Toxic Perfectionism 03:41 – Research Intent and Methodology 05:12 – Understanding Toxic Perfectionism 06:48 – Healthy vs. Toxic Perfectionism 09:46 – Impact of Perfectionism on Identity 10:33 – Balancing Standards and Self-Worth 12:06 – The Role of Perfectionism in Religious Context 13:13 – Addressing Youth and Leadership Dynamics 14:03 – The Challenge of Leadership Messaging 16:44 – Data Insights on Toxic Perfectionism 20:06 – The Role of Religion in Mental Health 22:44 – Encouraging a Positive Gospel Experience 24:33 – Parenting and Toxic Perfectionism in Youth 27:01 – The Importance of Love in Parenting 28:51 – The Impact of Parental Relationships on Identity 30:41 – Navigating Adolescence and Identity 32:27 – The Dangers of Silent Suffering 34:13 – Encouraging Healthy Standards in Youth 36:36 – Addressing LGBTQ Dynamics in Religious Context 38:10 – The Importance of Individualized Support 40:06 – Adult Experiences with Toxic Perfectionism 42:29 – Building a Secure Relationship with God The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.