Training Wheels and Hangovers
from Breakfast With Kid
A thunderstorm at 4:30 a.m. drags Kid out of bed and straight into a microphone, running on fumes, leftover beer, and a suspicious amount of confidence. The weather is apocalyptic, the coffee isn’t cooperating, and somehow the morning still turns into a running commentary on bar observations, questionable fashion decisions, and the strange ecosystem of free drinks and wandering eyes. Kid bounces between admiration, confusion, and mild disbelief, all while mentally preparing for a full day that somehow includes even more drinking. The chaos expands into parenting victories with a kid ditching training wheels, clever shortcuts that favor laziness over effort, and a running fascination with scents that seem engineered to override common sense. There’s also a low-level irritation with phones stealing attention at the worst moments, mixed with a packed schedule of breweries, batting practice, and late-night plans. It all lands somewhere between productive ambition and self-inflicted exhaustion, wrapped in the kind of morning that feels like it got out of hand before sunrise.
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