Trans Thought Leader: The Complex Politics of Being a Man episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 17, 2026 · 54 MIN

Trans Thought Leader: The Complex Politics of Being a Man

from Getting Close · host Aidan Wharton and Sandy

What can gay men learn from trans men? In this episode of Getting Close, I sit down with my friend Sandy for a very vulnerable conversation about how trans men and cis men exist within the gay community. We dive into masculinity, privilege, and what compassionate inclusion can look like in our spaces. Sandy Gooen is a published and produced writer. He's currently developing a musical called Twink Piece. He also runs TEMPO (@theetempo), which is an organization for Trans music professionals. His professional and academic background is mostly music and theater, but in his free time, he focuses a lot on gender and LGBT topics. At the root of Sandy's work is the desire to cultivate belonging and understanding! We get into * Which conversations about transness are oversaturated * Which conversations about transness still need to happen * What gay men don't know about the trans experience * The different ways that masculinity affects us all * And why gay men only talk to people they're attracted to, and how to start to change that. Follow Along! Follow Sandy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/silentwhat Follow Sandy on Substack: Follow Aidan: https://www.instagram.com/aidanwharton Follow Getting Close: https://www.instagram.com/gettingclosepod Chapters (00:00) Introduction (05:20) Growing Up Masculine (10:40) The Early Signs of Difference (16:00) Exploring Gender (21:50) The Carving Out A Space in NYC (27:10) Navigating Gay Spaces as a Trans Man (32:40) The Unspoken Social Rules Inside Queer Spaces (38:00) Why We're Afraid to Talk About Trans Experiences (43:30) Who Gets to Define Masculinity (49:30) What Connection Between Men Can Look Like This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit gettingclosepod.substack.com/subscribe

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Trans Thought Leader: The Complex Politics of Being a Man

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This episode was published on March 17, 2026.

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What can gay men learn from trans men? In this episode of Getting Close, I sit down with my friend Sandy for a very vulnerable conversation about how trans men and cis men exist within the gay community. We dive into masculinity, privilege, and what...

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