Two Poisons, One Duel: Claudius Outsources His Problems Again — Hamlet Act 4, Scene 7

Eugenia and Avery suffer through Hamlet Act 4, Scene 7, where Claudius does what he does best: dodges responsibility and turns crisis management into a group project. Instead of dealing with Hamlet like a functional adult monarch, he sweet-talks Laertes into a revenge plan that is somehow both overcomplicated and deeply tacky: a “friendly” fencing match featuring a poisoned sword, plus a backup poisoned chalice because apparently one murder method isn’t enough.Along the way, Claudius name-drops a random Norman horse legend (Lamord… why?), Laertes goes full rage mode with church-friendly murder vows, and then Gertrude strolls in with a gorgeously poetic tragedy update: Ophelia has drowned, narrated like an art film while everyone else is actively plotting homicide.Pour something cold, distrust any “mountebank” selling poison, and remember: if your plan needs two poisons, your plan is the problem.