Understanding Self-Sabotage and How To Stop It

Oftentimes we look at self-sabotage as a way to keep ourselves safe. However, we end up keeping ourselves from actually moving towards the goals and what we truly want in our lives. Self-sabotage in its covert way that we keep ourselves from actually living into the goals and dreams that we have and keeping ourselves safe through controlling the fallout.   Self-sabotaging behaviors are generally unhealthy patterns that create problems in our day-to-day lives that can cause emotional distress and difficulties in relationships. These self-destructive behaviors are often unconscious so sometimes they are difficult to identify or pick up on because these patterns have been normalized.     What are common self-sabotage behaviors? They are self-criticism, procrastination, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, taking on too much, suppressing one’s emotions, low self-esteem, not having healthy boundaries, people-pleasing, and being stuck in a fixed mindset instead of a growth mindset and overindulgence.   It’s important to understand why we might self-sabotage, because what we really want is the best for ourselves. Some of the factors are: low self-esteem, having the need for control, fear of failure and people in their relationships leaving them. Signs that you might be self-sabotaging in your relationships include holding grudges, not allowing your partner to have space, trust issues, gaslighting, focusing only on the negatives of your partner, being overly critical of your partner, avoiding intimacy, constantly comparing your partner to others, not being honest about your feelings.   How do you stop self-sabotaging? Learn to recognize your triggers, learn to be honest and open with your feelings and needs and take responsibility for your actions. Ending self-sabotage requires openness to recognize it, shifting your mindset and communicating it to those who you need to.    Continue Your Growth Journey: Kaminiwood.com