Not so easy being in charge of controls isn't which one of my breasts is literally a one or two question if I got it wrong Yeah, but one of them causes it to go into another folder and it still would not have been a problem We lose all the recording no, we don't lose the recording cuz I'm done. He says another file. I hate it Man it's good song. Who's that by the toadies the toadies possum key in them They miss the possum.
Did they one us? No, they started with a P. Oh, what do you mean possum starts with now? Oh, good point.
Just saying oh possum. This week is brought to you by here You have to whisper it because it's amazing is it a dick or is it a tater and it looks like it's in a perfume bottle Okay, not a perfume bottle. It look a big bottle perfume. Maybe a cologne ad.
It looks like it's cavaciade. Yeah, maybe Yeah, I don't know what I'm talking about. It's this amazing 20 year Colombian rum It tastes like caramel had sex with my mouth Yeah, that's where the other one tastes a little bit more amaretto. I've had the 12 year before this is the 20 year and it's fucking delicious Yeah, it's this rum will change your life.
Dude. What if you got them to sponsor us? That'd be awesome Amazing dude. I don't know you want to fly to Columbia and talk to the guy if we have email Cartagena so we got new chairs So this I might sound a little different cuz we're sitting a little lower might hear some popping and locking from these I like to pop I'm not anyways dragon crew what?
Welcome to Dan a Brent live forever. I'm Brent and you will live forever Especially if you're a fucking vampire. Yeah, right? Are you a vampire?
Listen man There's some things we need to talk about off the podcast. Okay Wonder why I only come over at night. Yeah over the lot of some block on a lot of some block big hat Well before we hop into the vampire thing talk about our week which you know today I don't know. I want to talk about me.
I know you should talk about you cuz I'm you know I'm just all lonely by myself and Charleston One my honey print takes off. Well, I go visit some family down in Florida. They're sick. You know sad Yeah, but I did get to go on a casino cruise, which I'm a bit of a gambler Those who know me know I like to gamble.
Yeah, I like to play the cards and I was playing blackjack wasn't doing too great Well, I started off winning like about I start with 40 bucks. I thought myself. I have five hours on the screws $20 an hour I immediately put down $40 as soon as I get there. I love the attic logic at the beginning right like I'm gonna have one cigarette every hour So I I start with 40 bucks.
I'm up like 60. So I got a hundred bucks nice. I sit there lose it all oh That's in the first 30 minutes. See you did all that happens.
So you went back for more. No, I just didn't leave the table Yeah, so I was down so I was like, okay Well, I had 15 free dollars and slots if I play if I earn four points or some however it works I end up having to spend like 20 bucks with slots to get my free $15 Whatever at the end of the day. I took on that makes sense I don't know it's something about how points like when you win you get points. So I hate slots Yeah, I do, but I paid it I played it just to get the free $15 and up leaving there with 15 cent off the slots.
That's terrible It was terrible, but then I hit roulette up roulette is the game, bro. I was murdering it on roulette Yeah, so this one time I was putting you know chip here there I always bet 10 15 25 because 1525 those are the ones that were hitting like the most actually said that they said the most you do center your corners You do sides. What's up? I do everything.
Yeah, I spread it carpet bomb Yeah, I hit a few numbers I probably hit like six eight numbers and that includes corners and sides and then I do usually either black or red or odd or even And then I definitely do one of the three rows was there a table minimum or was there a table minimum bet? Five dollar minimum so I don't know about you can spread that out. You can spread that out. Yeah only outside it had to be five dollars So yeah, I don't even or one of the roads.
Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty standard. I was murdered on rows Those are my favorite though. They're three to one odds.
I hate the ones really like yeah three one five dollar minimum and five Dollar minimum bet and I'm like no thanks. Yeah, so as long as you spread five chips in the center You're good, but anyways, so I had it on ten ten black sure enough it hit I'm like sweet I'm gonna leave it on there. I took my winnings but left the chip on ten black hit again wait No, I winnings hit again three times. I'm a 10 black.
That's what hundred and ten dollars hundred fifteen dollars Yeah, hundred five dollars math thirty five hundred five. What's that off of a dollar bet? Oh a dollar bet? Yeah And then this other dude was betting every time he bet twenty five dollars on thirty six red I was I did you're insane.
He must have money throw away. Did he bet? No, no twenty five dollar chips. Okay fucking hit Yeah, he won seven hundred eighty dollars like that.
Yeah, and every time he bet on I do a chip on there Cuz I mean he's eventually gonna hit yeah Yeah, I was killing it I left with like two hundred forty four bucks which is it much but pay for my ride nice I want to go again. I'm itching for it. I got an issue Dan think I'm an addict I haven't played we let since I went on a cruise like seven years ago cruisers are the funnest fucking thing ever aren't they? I had a great time most of the people I went with were big babies and for some reason didn't have a good time for whatever reason But who ever didn't get sick?
No, yeah, well, I mean everybody got a little sick here and there because well there was a storm Okay, well casino cruises obviously a lot smaller shit rock and wave. I mean, yes hang on So you can see the cruise you're there to gamble. Yeah I think what everybody's problem was is it was a carnival cruise and it was like I guess kind of off-seasonish and Our boat was whatever the minimum capacity was that was it and there was like nobody really our age Real scared skeleton crew type situation where it's like well There's one there yeah, and so you go to the bar at night you go to there's stupid little dance club Oh, well, I went on the casino cruise during the day which is like from 11 to 4 yeah So there's like all old people is all to I mean yeah, but you're there to gamble. Yeah I said next I do to smell like he should have spent pretty sure she has pants.
Oh and just sat there and kept gambling and shaking Maybe he was just old isn't that weird like as your organs begin to die like you can smell that That's my old folks own smells so bad. Yeah, good point. I'm dying parts like decay. Yeah, and people shooting pants Yeah, that too Anyways, man, so you had a pretty lackluster week.
Yeah, I mean it was kind of fun played play a lot of games Play some pUBG yeah, I've been pretty addicted to that. It's a fun game right play last night We were killing it crushing it. I like now what I like do instead of like hiding the whole time I like to drop in on the action man. Oh, yeah It's more fun.
Yeah, you get basically the same points. So those of you don't know pUBG or Player on the battleground there you go is a Giant map where it's like hunger game style. They take you and 99 other people and drop you from plane Okay, perfect you say hungry and style. Can I be real what what is hungry games originally based on a better oil?
Yeah, have you seen me it is a better oil style. You're correct. I've read the book too. Okay.
We'll stop I know but it's just so good. It's just and weird about it. It's not weird. It's just let me explain what the games I know damn it.
I'm just saying that's like you saying This is kind of like Pathfinder when really you mean D&D. No one got that go ahead. I Just a wish me buddy anyway It's just they drop you into a circle or into a map and the object is to survive to the last one So there's there's vehicles. There's no Nothing every single time and it's one and done you die you're dead You're dead and it's I've been playing games all my life and it's one of the most exciting games ever played I don't know you But does it give you like this weird shaky adrenaline rush?
Yeah for the I mean like when I play it takes me like a good 30 minutes to an hour to calm down to go to sleep Like that's the same kind of rush like if you're playing something competitive like like a fighting game where you're like on a tear Where you know you've won like nine in a row or you've like or you're just about to beat somebody who's supposedly way better than you Yeah, and you get that like kind of jerry like oh shit I'm gonna do it just much just much That's kind of how you feel like most of the time in that game because man anything can happen me and Thomas murdered a whole entire Squad same time. Yeah, I think it's not actually Thomas is it. Oh, yeah, that's his last name. Yeah, anyways Yeah, we were we're squatted up with two other dudes.
I don't know And I didn't recognize the other name anyways I think me and razor back with only two left alive and they were all getting shot from the top of the hill And I was like screw that I got a bike and I rode up the hill and just jumped off and started took one down took another down and then the third one took me down but razor back was up the hill revives me I popped back up finishing him off the whole swabs dead another squad comes in we didn't see him killed us all Ah Place third yeah, it's super fun. I don't know anyways. It's really fun Never thought I'd get him to play multiplayer games got killed at the buy it was playing with him a little bit really Friends with him on Xbox friends is it called friends? Yeah, I'm gonna do this because right now We don't have any listeners if you have an Xbox and you have my friend for sure hit me up 10 42 all spelled out I will gladly play video games with you.
Yeah, I'm the G laser the G laser with an S. Yeah, it's my rat name So this week man, we're talking about vampires. Yeah, we were thinking about doing like a scenario thing But I don't think we're gonna I think we're mostly just gonna discuss vampires because there's so much man It's way too much like I just talk about it. Where do you want to start like I just want to start?
Let's hold off on on games and movies. Yeah, that's what we all like that at the end like yeah me too It seems to like wrap it up and out the door So I guess you want to start I mean kind of have to start stories because that's where most of it comes from well Obviously, I guess Dracula. I see that's that's a lot of the in the end paler right who love marshmallows So I guess yeah, if you want to talk about a little bit at least Why the vampires even a thing real quick you know I think this is gonna be a great episode why because neither one of us had to do any research on this no we didn't I know Everything about Vlad the Impaler and all types of vampires and what about that chick you gotta give me more than that shit I know what you're saying though. Yeah, that's where it's more fun where we don't have to stop and look everything up as she looks So anyway the illusion dude Vlad the Impaler Romania Romania 1442.
I mean that date. I don't know the dates Let me know. So anyways big fan of marshmallows especially rosen member fire. Have you seen that mean no It's like the Impaler.
He's put a marshmallow in the staking site these things are fucking great Anyway, see was I um whoa wait what did you say 1440 something? 1448 is that what they did us pretty close dude. Holy shit. Nicely done I mean I probably have read that a hundred times as it no way 1476 slash 77.
Yeah, look over there at the time Prince of Looks like a Kovia. Well, actually It all sounds made up. Oh Prince you three times between 1448 ends death. Wow, you know I've probably read that like so many times that it's just in my memory in some weird bank that I just instantly recall without thinking about it Or you just lined me and you like quickly did a little flood the impaler search on your phone fine He's my dad But anyways, so he was a general I think yeah of turk and he was fighting against the Turkish I believe Ottomans Ottomans this is all from memory from me.
That's a gun I'm I used to be like kind of obsessed with empires hence me buying some items in the autumn of Ottomans in the autumn That's like rural tour Ottomans in the autumn of 1448 flatislav Broken to Wallachia with autumn support Lot of return and start revenge on the Ottoman Empire and yeah, yeah, yeah went to Moldovia etc, etc, boring boring came into conflict with the Transylvania Saxon see I thought Transvania was made up. No, it's an actual place. Yeah, so real place Romania Oh wait, maybe it's its own place, but it's in the Romanian area anyway Anyways, what he was known for he invited people over I guess whoever he was battling like the the king or generals of that area for dinner Like a peace dinner, but he had like all the soldiers impaled on wooden spikes So they're like walking that uncommon back then but I mean like supposedly fields of them Oh, I didn't know that like they're walking to this castle for this dinner and it's like yeah Oh, your people are dead. Do you want to continue this fight?
That's why they nicknamed him Vlad the Impaler because it was his like favorite way to kill people because they wouldn't die instantly You know that right they would stay up there moaning and tortured dying slowly snap so he would do that while they were alive Oh, yeah, oh shit through the ass out the mouth Oh my god, and you die slowly because you don't bleed out not immediately because it's gonna well cuz the stakes in there Just bust up your organs. Yeah, you said you're dying bleeding internally and starving at the same time You're just gonna get septic it's just the worst way to die I would think besides having your flesh Graph laid huh this thing is Wikipedia saying that Dracula is based off Vlad the Impaler, right? Vlad the Impaler's father. What Vlad drackel Vlad the dragon.
Yeah, that was Vlad the Impaler was Vlad Drackel right When that same guy cool means yeah, they call him that because he was basically like I mean a real dick when it came to war I might have just been from the book. I thought it was based off Vlad the Impaler though Yeah, for sure are you saying they're the same person Vlad drackel and Vlad? Yeah, he was Vlad drackel because he was the Duke or something of drackel was it no? I don't know order the dragon.
I don't know Slavic. Oh, yeah son of drackel so his dad's name was drackel whatever So anyways, it's definitely based off him like he was like a super right you know torture porn type dude torture poor Like hey, I'm just gonna stick these six of these people's asses and let him hang here The fuck up thing about his gravity would slowly drag you down it keeping a nice Anti-bleeding pressure on your asshole. I guess is that so is that it's called vampire poke them with a pyre isn't that one? That's a great I don't know yeah, yeah, I don't see how that relates to Dracula.
Well, I think they came up. Oh no I'm here. I want to look up vamp here cuz I bet you vamp here came before vampire All right, I've got a couple of tabs open. I think I think vampire came out of vamp here I would think empire like of the py yeah vampire P-a-r-y-e like I said this is gonna be our best episode Either way, I don't feel like that matters anyways everyone knows what a vampire is I mean pretty much a vampire is undead meaning they were alive They got bit by vampire and or drink of empires blood and became back as a vampire themselves I feel like in most movies anyway, and I'm not trying to get in movies yet But I think it's also in Dracula well like if you if they don't kill you you'll become a vampire Well, see here's the here's thing you go.
I'm not talking about movies, but I mean everything is either movies or books It's well the book's real. I mean so it's well It was believed it was sensationalized by newspapers a long time ago about people being killed by vampires That's how the stories came about well. Yes, and part of that is because when you die what happens your skin shrinks back right? So your nails get long your more your teeth are exposed That's weird so people were thinking you know they go look at a body who just died like a week ago and they go Oh shit their vampire look they're bleeding from their mouth obviously because they're decaying their teeth are their things really long Well because their skin's shrunk back because they're dehydrated and their nails are longer obviously same reason you're dehydrated your Your skin's gonna peel back and you're gonna look like a fucking monster interesting the vampire spell pyre Pre-dates Dracula didn't realize that 1819 versus 18 really six.
Yeah, you know Bram Stoker's was 1897. Oh shit I don't know that I thought Bram Stoker was like the origination of vampire me too John Pauladore So okay real quick. What do you consider a vampire like I mean everyone has like their own thing like oh that's definitely not a vampire I'm also I'll say mine like the attributes. Yeah.
Yeah, go ahead. Obviously has died and come back. Yeah, you know I say I don't mean I don't mean they were like I feel like a transform almost like it kind of like a almost like a zombie They're undead. Yeah, like you get sick with the vampire disease.
They have to drink blood to live Huh can't be in sunlight correct crosses or holy symbols repel them most of the time because yeah This is where I think we're gonna go. That's where the gray area goes because like that also like the transformation I think is is sort of gray area. Yeah, I mean what kills him's gray area even well I would say definitely sunlight definitely wouldn't stick through the heart. Yes What they fear or what can hurt them I think is kind of open to what version now what version I like though I just want to fear I like where it's like the holy symbol that relates to what religion they were in when they were alive That makes sense.
So it's like if you're a Buddhist I guess a Buddhist statue would like but a cross would be like I don't care anything about the cross whereas like a Christian vampire obviously across a Bible Before you've never heard before you've never heard before you just made that up. No, I made that up Whereas like you know if you're an um if you were a Hindu well then like all the Hindu gods would you know statues and symbols of them would ward you off I don't know where I got that from I've read that somewhere or saw a movie that was like based on that Huh? I've never heard of anything other than like a Christian based vampire. Yeah, like crosses holy water Bibles right?
That's a really good question dude. I'm really thought of that um yeah, cuz I mean why would a Buddhist vampire be scared of a cross? Other than just making it more cool. I haven't really heard any justification for it But supposedly there's like super strength.
Yeah super strength. I would say I have read yeah faster transformation animal like Reflexes and an animal transformation very difficult to kill obviously you can't you can't just like you can't just like shoot one I have heard silver bullets. I've read silver bullets in a couple places, but it's not real common No, I would say decapitation right and then you have to stuff the head with garlic or something like that I've read oh yeah like this Real freaky book that I should not have been reading in elementary school Which actually gave me nightmares for a long time You had to burn someone at the stake burn a vampire at the stake and then decapitate them no get this while they're burning all these like Animals would come rushing out of the fire like rats and bats and and like creepy crawlies animals of the night And the village's responsibility was to kill all of those animals because if any of them got away the vampire could get away So I wonder if that's where the transformation should came from well I've always heard like you know I think obviously bats is one thing that vampires can turn into yeah, that's pretty common Um, I've heard plagues of rats plagues of rats sure the weirdest one will dogs wolfs or dogs wolves Yeah, but the weirdest one is fog yeah, that is weird a mist a mist like I don't know where that I mean maybe just people are I mean cuz this if you've ever been outside in a fog when you look around you can't see shit Yeah, it's scariest fuck. I want to say that's a little brim stoker is isn't there like a I don't know about that.
I think I think at least I'm never I don't think I've ever read Bram Stoker I've read a bit it's been a long time Yeah, and if I have it's been forever But I think when he arrives it just happens to be foggy when he arrives to conceal his Right entry into a building whatever one thing that is present in the book and the movie I think is to maintain his strength that the earth from from his grave from Transylvania Yeah from where he was buried originally isn't necessary for him to yes maintain the strength Bram Suckers, I just isn't okay. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me Well, I guess just part of the fellas supposedly vampires and creatures of the night or hand-in-hand wolves anything you hear at night basically right Except raccoons and then it's one of the few or the Stracula. It's one of the few Monsters that has a familiar. Oh, yes, Renfield.
Yeah now that greenfield actually creeped me out more than Dracula did for sure Because I mean what if you're like all of a sudden my control you're like eating spiders and bugs because that's all your master allowed you to eat It was pretty clearly was insane in the first place But yeah, like that was the trade-off like Dracula with a lot of him to have small lives. Yeah like insects and rats Yeah, basically nothing with blood right and then he gets all the blood I don't I don't think he ever transforms in this he doesn't ever let him do turn into a vampire. Does he no? I don't think every day he's just a familiar yeah Usually that's the whole how they get you like I'll turn you into a vampire and you'll be powerful like me if you do You're a bitch and then usually you either get killed or the vampire gets killed and you're like stuck being a little bitch Did somebody needs to get the mail and meet the cable guy and shit.
Yeah, right? I mean it's got to do shit during the day somebody does So the other thing that is always sort of interesting is Like as long as you can sustain feeding I mean you're essentially immortal right well and depending on where you get your source or depending what source you're pulling from what book Movie whatever sometimes like I mean you can go hundred years without feeding you just look and feel like shit Right and then if you catch someone or sometimes it's not even people you can drink the blood of animals They survive right so it all depends on you know what I've never really heard that distinction in anything that they can or cannot Drink an empire. Oh what saying you can't drink. Yeah, I mean not really any mythology that I can think of yeah I mean but when you think vampire you think human blood for some reason I do like I mean I think if I were vampire like if you like you're cheating it'd be so much easier just a fucking drink I some animal blood and I've always thought that too man and you could totally get away with being a vampire forever I can't have you think you would have organized that yourself.
Okay, you're you're fucked obviously because you're a fire now Yeah, hunter. Yeah hunter. I mean it's that simple should your drink its blood. Well, you can't shoot a night But still I mean okay.
Well if you're a vampire you can easily just chase down a deer and attack it by hand See tonight you feel like they have like crazy night vision I don't think they have crazy night vision, but I think they can I think they have like the eyes of wolves like you know Like they have the creature the night vision like obviously they can see better night if they're in a dark room And you're in dark room They're gonna find you before you find them Do you feel like they can like see into the veil like like their visions like creepier than yours better not creepier like they can't see like You know ghosts while they're just walking around I feel like ghosts and vampires are so far apart that you never really see them together People and ghosts are pretty far apart, but they always kind of walk that line aren't they they are the undead I mean they're kind of dead and not dead. Maybe they can see more shit I don't know just an idea. I mean I've just never heard of a vampire show where that also included ghosts Mmm. No, you're right which would be an interesting thing although, which is the one monster squad the monsters quad.
Yeah Mummy, oh man, that's good one. I think I think we're gonna take a break real quick. We'll be a we're right back All right, all right, we're back not so easy being in charge of the controls isn't which one do I press? This is a literally a one or two question if I got it wrong Yeah, but one of them causes it to go into another folder and it still would not have been a problem We lose all the recording no, we don't lose the recording cuz I'm done.
It says it is another file. I hate it I hate you so much real quick So the check out trying to think of earlier was the the blade countess. Oh, yeah, Marie Is it Marie something? Yeah, and it's one of those weird.
Yeah, not Marie and tonight not ironic names So basically she was the one who thought like bathing in virgin blood. Yeah, Elizabeth Bathory. Yeah, bathing virgin blood kept her young Just the blood of young women. She got me headed, right?
She deserved it as she didn't I'm pretty sure she did a lot of fucked up shit She had like a whole torture chamber like underneath her castle where she would store young women and then basically drain their blood into a bathtub and soak in it thinking This will keep me young. Yeah, it's young girls were dragged into the dungeons in the 1590s mercilessly and sometimes rituals ritualistically tortured and You know as her looks again, babe She apparently acquired a taste for blood around her 40s. Yeah, cuz if bathing and then fix it drinking it will Yeah, drained into a bathtub So Elizabeth could wash and it's real fucked up without tent your skin red. There's all the blood in your skin Just get ready.
I mean, but wouldn't it stain your skin? I don't know. I don't know. Maybe she would rinse off I just blood just rinse off that easily.
I mean if it wasn't unless it's a wound doesn't blood wash off your hands I guess I've never let it like never bathed in it. Well, there's that time you killed that guy Listen to the nut tub on the podcast. Then you just kind of mix it in with the dirt. Yeah, I mean dirt is the best hand wash That's very true.
I mean it actually is you have something on your hand. You can't get off scrub your hands with dirt and wash them It's pretty gritty. Yeah, it's the grit is what gets rid of it. Yeah, so anyways me and you both we just now we went down We wrote down a bunch of stuff.
We want to continue to talk about this episode right? I have a shit ton of stuff on one of our vampires. Why don't you go ahead and take the first one? Okay, I was just gonna ask you what the hell you were talking about, you know how long you would live and I'm just curious what you do with All your time well first off let's say this like our vampires immortal forever It's like as long as they're fed they appear to be immortal.
Okay, so what would I do in my time man? Let's say you've got the blood thing figured out like listen. I want a synthetic I'm gonna I know I'm gonna live forever with no problems without me. Let's not figure that part out Let's just say you've got to hook up at the red cross.
Yeah, okay, whatever. That's another thing I didn't write down. I want to talk about man I mean I would learn instruments. I mean music here's the thing if you're gonna be a vampire you have to be persuasive You have to make people fall in love with you unless he knows this is part of your powers Fuck that's another thing I didn't write down.
Yeah, damn it Dan. You're fucking taking off boxes and anything about see me So yeah, glamor. So I mean here's the thing here's what would really do with your time This is gonna go in the question. This is gonna go in one of my my checkboxes Okay, have you seen the old pictures of Nicholas Cage?
Yeah, well he played a vampire in one movie Yeah, but there's like pictures of some dude from like the 1800s and it's sure as fuck Nicholas Cage. Oh really? Yeah, okay, we're gonna look at it and there's there's multiple like actors It's like look at this picture from this really old time. It totally looks like this actor.
Yeah, it's all kinds of stuff Would you not just be an actor for a few years fade out and then come back three generations after that and become an actor again? Mmm, cuz you would you would get so lonely. I think it's the problem You can't have a partner. I mean you'd have to make other vampires did not yeah, and then it's like I mean sometimes I get tired of my wife We've been together five years.
You know I can imagine spending a thousand years with a woman I mean, no, I love my wife's good question. I mean you don't have to answer a thousand years. It's a long time It's a good question. You don't have to answer would you turn your wife?
Mmm? Yeah, that's a no you took too long You would kill that bitch or just watch your guy one of the two like why don't you never age shut up honey Everyone thinks I look really young from age to you you do kind of So for the greatness I'm starting to graze my beard. I know yeah fucking real this one I told my wife I'm gonna start what is it called when the dye for the men's beard just from in no creasion formula? No, it's a dye.
It's a just from in yeah, you said that yeah, that's what it is I mean I'm totally gonna do that because I really hate the three or four gray hairs in my beard. He's gonna be a good Green do you really know? Oh, thank god? I didn't answer that night said it and I hope you don't seriously Yeah, they're great always yeah, I have hair first man.
You know what? I'm not looking forward to I mean This is my gross some people out but like eventually your girls ass hair is gonna turn gray. I don't know how to respond to that Yeah, I know right I don't respond to that moving on yep So what I do in my time definitely learn a bunch of instruments I think music would be my outlet I mean because there's so many instruments to learn I wonder master like the piano the guitar the guitar the guitar that time yeah the City and Iraq mm-hmm. I wonder if okay, so you're dead kind of you're undead mostly let's just say undead I mean you actually think you can feel not only tactile well.
That's what I'm having organs Do you feel pain do vampires feel pain? I don't know if they feel joy. I mean like there's no is there serotonin you stop emotion Oh, that is good point. You don't have you don't have the chemicals that make you think you're happy That's how people are getting clinically depressed you have to have feelings because you have the hunger or the thirst Which another my checkbox like yeah, but that's how that craving that's a desire.
That's not really a feeling I desire the feeling do you think you could feel happier set? I think your brain is still chemically induced yes I would think of a virus brain. I'm wild so they have like all this sex maybe to try to feel the pleasure right They're just like I'm gonna have these huge orgies. Oh, I feel nothing.
I'll kill everyone So maybe just feels like you're on a bunch of blow all the time fuck that'd be fucking horrible right would be like dead Pull where you're like are where Wolverine well where where we're wearing Wolverine where you're like I want to die But I can't but or you're afraid to I think after a certain time you'd be okay with it I don't think it'd be that long would you feel like you're an abomination? Would you be afraid to die because you're like oh well? I'm devil beast clearly okay? So if I were back in the day like in the 1400s and became a vampire right by the 1800s I'm watching a sunrise You let you let me know if I became a vampire today, huh?
Oh there might be a cure around the corner Or just lots of sunblock that's another thing my checkbox does some block work for vampires it does on some real quick You know why vampires drink blood right? Something with the hemoglobin or they all have sickle cell vitamin D vitamin D because I can't go in the sun because they can't go in the sun That's why they have to drink blood interesting. I don't know if that's in something, but that's my theory behind drinking blood Huh? I know they have some kind of screwed up explanation and something and then yeah I always thought it was just because the life force beginning of time blood equals life.
Yes sacred, etc People aren't supposed to drink it. So do vampires have souls? I don't know. I mean once they die do they get to go to a heaven or hell?
Well, that's that's where I'm saying like is a vampire just a person purgatory Well, that's what I'm saying like that's I think that would be a huge amount of fear For your own death as a vampire But you don't really know but as a human you're afraid of death exactly that's but you can continue to live you can continue to live On the blood of other people and would you just assume that you're evil because you're a vampire? I wouldn't but I would don't any money. I'll do any a lot of money. That's what I would do my time I'd make some money imagine being a broke-ass vampire.
Oh, it's suck like a skid row vampire Yeah, but how long is that gonna last? I mean just because you can live forever don't mean you're good with money Yeah, you might be dumb you might be a fucking idiot vampire stuck on skid row shoot a parallen Although I've been on this for 38 years now. I'm a master money. So maybe I wouldn't do all that well mass more than others You have a house.
Yeah, cuz I'm that's why privilege Fucking is but it is but it is but it is but it isn't I mean I could have done more I don't want to get in the white for something because I don't want to get in that no, but I mean Yeah, we work hard. Yeah, both of us we show it work every day I feel like you don't have things holding us back from going to work like true four kids That we had when we were in high school true, you know, yeah, there's a lot of factors involved a sick mom That doesn't have any sport, but if you are essentially immortal you can kind of wait it out I mean your family's all gonna die so you're gonna scoop up all your family stuff But I'm saying what if you're basically your own skid row already? A vampire comes and goes I'm turning you to a vampire and you're like yes You're like yes, I want to live forever and do heroin forever because I'm a skid row But at the same time like after that ask a question we didn't get into would you say yes Absolutely your life right now. Yes.
Yes. Yeah, absolutely. I think about it for a second. Then I'd be like Cool.
Yeah for sure. Would you get would you ask him the same run down of questions? Would you like so do you live forever? How old are you?
These are the questions I would ask Yeah, I think we have to do this. Yeah, number one. How do you continue to live? Do you have to drink the blood of humans?
Is it any vampire guy now? I'm saying yes. Mm. Okay.
Can it be donated blood? Yes. Oh, okay. Can be frozen.
Oh, wow Synthetic blood synthetic. No, I mean I mean, hey dude. I don't know why it's just real blood. It's only thing.
Okay. It's gotta be donated. It's gonna come from a person That's fine. I'll hit up an earthquake town.
You guys are working at the Red Cross You gotta follow natural disasters if you want to live as a vampire or just volunteer for the Red Cross Bags of blood everywhere. So you have to drink human blood to live check. Okay. That doesn't determine for being a vampire too live forever Yeah, as long as you don't catch any rays.
What happens if I don't drink blood? You become very weak and you can what is the time frame of that? Uh, like a day without blood you've got like a week That's a pretty fun time. When you start to get so feeble that you can't get blood for yourself You know, it's weird you think of a week now.
It's pretty long time if you're a vampire for a thousand years weeks nothing No weeks nothing, but I mean how long is a week when you've got like five bucks, right? Pretty fucking long. Why because you're trying to figure out how to eat How can I be killed if I'm a vampire sunlight check? Stay through the heart check?
I would say those are the big ones. I mean starving to death, but that's that's that's what's gonna happen I feel like that's like the worst way to die like if you're trapped as a vampire I think as a human that's the worst way to die of course But I feel like it would take longer as a vampire. I mean we've gone over the question Can you eat yourself and live off yourself? I've asked you that I don't feel like you can I don't either So I'm the vampire expert here now.
No, okay, so I have to eat no son avoid sticks of the heart Yep Well, yeah, I mean there's obviously exceptions like if you get caught in a nuclear blast You're not gonna like re-heal now you can re-heal if you're incinerated if you're incinerated you're done because that's the same thing as sunlight Basically the sun is burning down. Yeah, you're done. Yeah, if you can recover from non-lethal wounds Now, what if I'm a member of a church and I go to a dunking pool that has been blessed by a priest And therefore I get dunked in holy water think about it this way. It's the same as Jumping into a pool of boiling water.
I'll be like, ah fuck. I'll get out I'll be like how many times have you done that and plus who plays zero times what night? You've done that zero times same concept. Just avoid it.
I've been in a ducking pool before not boiling water That's what I'm trying to say. Yeah. Yeah. If you know what the issue is you can avoid it.
Yeah, you will avoid it Yeah, because you want to continue it. Okay, I'm still gonna say yes I think that's all the questions I have. Oh, another question. Can I turn other people into vampires?
Yes, you can give them a choice before you kill them Okay, and last thing if you the master vampire is killed do I become cured? No, that's all that's all destroyed but grim Okay, there's no once you're vampire your vampire. Yeah, because I've warned about that Like if you kill them because some some movies books if you kill the master vampire than everyone underneath is cured No, I mean making that decision is kind of like you're at death's door and you like kick open the screen door and then you're just gonna Never mind. You stick a couple suspect.
Okay. No, you're vampire. I'm definitely still becoming a vampire You get some really sharp teeth. Oh sunscreen sunscreen works I love you the time, but you've got a word every 15 minutes got a reply You've got to wear other things like you gotta have sunglasses you gotta have a hat So I could go out in the sun if I have a hat sunscreen Yeah, but it's not a record.
I mean if something were to happen. Yeah, some good. Hey, kill that coat and you get your coat your dead Well, okay. How long in the sunlight you last is it a stand burn or burn immediately?
You start to burn Yeah, like you'll be engulfed in flame within seconds. Okay, but we've all seen different movies where I was like Oh, I'm in the sun. I'm on fire. Okay.
I remember the shade. Yeah, I'm hurt, but I can heal from that right? I need a time from exposure to death Five minutes. Yeah between zero and five minutes if you don't five minutes or less get out of the sun Like and somebody get the fuck out of the sun dumps you in some water immediately than you're done.
Hopefully not holy water, right? Assault in the wound one last final question. Is there an actual van housing who will eventually try to hunt me down because I'm a vampire? Well, you know, it's not all that popular to hunt vampires anymore because most people just think we don't exist so Is there that family line that goes?
We're still hunting vampires dude. I haven't seen one in 20 years in 70 20 years is not that long Vampire though 70s 80s, you know around when the lost boys came out There's got people that were trying to do it, but I mean where they they don't know which one of us is real I mean, that's just like murder. That's just murder people like trying to hunt down vampires You know what I mean? Like it's a really ineffective career choice for most people.
Okay. I guess I do have some more Because as long as you shut up about it super strength. Oh, yeah, okay, so if I do get arrested for murdering someone I can get out of jail pretty easily. I don't feel like that you would well.
I mean you've got the hypnosis thing So I mean you can talk away out of almost everything. I have hypnosis. Yeah, yeah, I'm a vampire. I stepped on other vampires Yeah, it's not even really hypnosis.
It's more just like it's more like a Jedi mind trick like you can kind of lead someone's decision You can you can direct their thoughts like yeah, now let's say I do get a vampire to vampire thought fight Right is the age of the vampire to pen determine who's gonna win that fight not really the older yard not the stronger you are No, I don't think so. It's just whoever has the most recent juice up vamp virgin blood Yeah, I mean you're not gonna run into ton of other vampires because you're gonna try to join a blog You're gonna try to I mean there's a couple blogs But I mean they're not well-maintained. I mean everybody just kind of gets bored with everything I would have to ask you how long have you lived? Five hundred and sixty-five years.
That is a pretty long time. Yep. Why are you turning into a vampire? Why are you even giving this option?
Do you just need a new friend? No, I don't really generally need friends I don't know. I just don't really like killing people. Yeah, just everyone's like listen I usually kill and so to make myself feel less guilty about actually drinking blood.
I'm like look I'm not gonna kill you if you don't want to okay. It makes me feel a little bit better about not erasing your life And I'm assuming like 90% of people say yes term in a vampire versus kill me. Uh, everyone of them have your are the eight All right, I usually don't do this but you fed off of them five hundred something. Yeah, I think I've come back to the red grass Like two weeks ago.
Oh, yeah, good point. All right. Well, I think I would definitely do it I would ask you this question, but I wouldn't want to answer I'm gonna ask you because I want you to answer this but I don't as person being turned to vampire I don't want the answer right how painful is the transformation? I really don't remember man.
That's a long time ago I remember it not being that much fun. I mean do you feel like you're dying? I mean obviously you're dying I know what you would assume death would feel like I don't know I have not remember Really trying to hang on to the last few threads of life as you fade away to wake up renewed as an undead okay Dying has to be the most serious the the transformation not that bad. You're not gonna be you're not gonna really remember it Yeah, I guess after it's way more smart.
Oh, it's like a really nasty nasty hangover I have to ask you where everything feels like throbbing when you turn into a vampire Do you have to bury me and have to dig myself out of my own grave? No, that's a thing sometimes Yeah, and you don't necessarily have to sleep in a coffin. You know what I've heard of I think it's just kind of a tradition thing Yeah, just because it's airtight yeah like like Christmas trees. I never really got this one thing I heard to go to like to get rid of a part easiest way.
Huh is this turn them over in their grave? Right. Yeah, that's stupid. I mean I just flip over Yeah, but it's kind of like when you're under like when a big wave hits you kind of don't know what's up What's down first but it's for a second.
Well see this ridiculous anyway because that's a likelihood of You can feel grab somebody burying you by the time you turn because I mean it takes like 24 hours. I mean oh exactly Yeah, I mean yourself included but the other seven I left in a dark place by themselves where they were gonna be found right away You don't even help mount like I'll come back as vampire alone. No, you're gonna remember this conversation Okay, I mean are you gonna be there to kind of like hey listen this kind of I'm gonna show you the rest real quick No, no, I'm gone dude. Why man?
I don't want to be friends I've tried being friends before and I usually just get annoyed because they're not trying to tag along with me and shit It's cool then I'll be a vampire Now would you be a vampire if all those same questions were answered the same way for sure for sure. No hesitation No, it's really the longevity. I think is the traction. I mean I don't really care superpowers And we didn't even get into transformation.
Well, yeah, I asked how it would be that's about it But oh, yeah, you mean in other animals. Yeah, yeah I would think each act of superpower would consume more of your life force. Therefore you'd need to drink more blood Like spawn whereas if you were just like I'm just gonna chill my room watch TV today Yeah, it gives me an extra day of not drinking blood because I haven't done shit today I mean how annoyed would you be with really any sort of entertainment? I think you're right with with music because there's so much there well even one instrument and that's why I said acting as well like Yeah, different roles and just being you'd have to like disappear and then reappear as like your son like for every 40 years Real quick, I'm gonna tell you a joke before I forget because I didn't write this down But I used to tell the joke my cousin and she gets even now she's like every time I said He's like do the do the vampire joke.
You built it up quite a bit. So I go ahead. Oh, no, it's not great I made this up when I was like 10 so what is the baby vampire say to his mom what mommy? I want to suck your neeble master.
Yeah, I know I don't know It's really uncomfortable and I don't tell it again So one thing I did forget to ask the vampire master um Do you have to ask permission to come into people's houses? I do need to be invited you have to be invited a person's home is there sanctuary? And I'm not allowed to disrespect that cool. So you can't even destroy the house.
No, I really can't I mean it I mean what if there's a large explosion next to the house what do you mean? Like let's say you break a gas main and then blow it up. Look dude. I don't know when you think these things are happening But I don't have like a description of every sort of possibility.
I know that I'm just saying can a vampire destroy a person's house? I'm a fucking I know I'm destroying a house I'm asking you as Dan. Do you think vampires? Can destroy people's homes?
Well, obviously not I was just answering that way. So you definitely think they have to be invited in Yeah, I think so. Yeah, for sure. Or they catch you on the streets.
That's the way to do it Yeah, parks. Well, in my opinion, it's a little bit of a late night affair lovers gray area because of the hidden it isn't thing like Inviting it's not really your free will if I've tricked you if I tell you to invite me in right hmm good call. Yes, come in I don't know. It just kind of goes along with all the you know like magical witchcraft sort of wards Yeah, like well, maybe your home is your castle kind of thing They can't I caught glamour just because I used to watch true blood.
They can't glamor you when you're in your home So if you're inside, sorry, I'm still real ladies. I used to watch your blood for three seasons and I quickly fell off Boobs there we go Forgive because we all wanted to see the redheads boobs and never shushing so thanks Vampires have two fangs their canines are extended correct Yep, and that's what they bite to puncture the skin to drink the blood correct I've seen you know you see some movies where vampires have like two upper fangs or one stu Yeah, first like what was it? Penny dreadful and they had their like weird like buck tooth fangs. Well or like a niche about Mr.
Dums. Nope. No, that's rot too Not as far as to he had regular fangs in it. No, he didn't he had like a row.
Yeah like monster. Yeah, like Snack tooth um so van Helsing do you think that's a real like bloodline that hunts vampires? Like do you think that someone's actual last name Helsing? Oh, I'm sure it is like if you were born Dan Helsing Would you not like in your early 20s be like I'm gonna fucking hunt vampires.
Yeah Dan Van Helsing Well, I think they would be the middle name on it. I don't know what you call that But it's part of the last name is it okay, but if you're a damn dumb man Helsing would you not in your early 20s be like I'm gonna definitely go hunt fucking vampires. I would do a lot of research And now if you had kids and grandkids would you not tell your kids and grandkids we come from a long line of vampire hunters Yeah, whether I found one or not. No They don't know how to use a crossbow.
I feel sorry for anyone whose last name is Van Helsing If you're last name Van Helsing please write in and let us know because I would be super interested to talk to you Can we be best friends forever? so Anyway, we want to talk about you want you want? Okay, so I went through sunscreen sloburn fast burn Van Helsing mine. Can they read minds or are they telepathic or what is that whole mind control thing is it?
Suggestion. I think it gets back to the hypnosis thing. It seems like more of a suggestion It's just depending on how weak-minded the person is right which nowadays. Yeah, could do just about everyone right?
Um, so the most horrifying thing about vampires is kid vampires. I agree there. I think we can start going into movies I agree there let the right one in I was just like an interview with uh, oh that too interview with vampires Um, Kristen, Kristen Dunst. Yeah, yeah, she's a worst part of that movie But also because of the creepy little kid vampires.
Yeah, like I told you I wasn't gonna tell this on the park I told you this or I'm gonna do anyways, so I have sleep paralysis pretty regularly if I sleep in my back Right there for sleep my stomach defined regularly all the time if I sleep in my back Seriously, yeah, I think it has a lot to do sleep at me. What if yeah, because you're like dying. Yeah, and so How'd you feel about me being there doing a sleep study and like immediately recording you when you were like Oh, you will this is what happens and then I would ask you immediately what happened. What did you see?
Okay, well, let me tell you the story real quick. Okay, so this is what happens when I have sleep paralysis I will be asleep and then I will be awake, but I will not be awake fully. I'm still dreaming my body is awake I feel like my eyes are open. I feel like my eyes are open.
Yeah, I know I know I was asleep Okay, I feel like I woke up everything looks normal. Yep. I cannot move and instant I realized that I have sleep paralysis I've this dread is not the word it's worse this Overcoming fear sees in my seats in my soul Right like this like the worst thing in the world is coming to kill me right not even kill me just consume me I understand and so one time I had this and I woke up and I'm looking around my room and what happens is I can't move but I can mumm Mummer mummer can go Right I usually do that to get my wife's attention because she knows I have this and she wakes me up and she you know Comes over shakes me and I wake up and I'm good right well because I stay awake for the next several hours Of course, so one time I was doing this and obviously she didn't hear me and all of a sudden through the doorway into my room I see a small figure coming closer to me And it reminds me of like the thing from the ring like just just shadowy figure with hair in his face You can't see what's going on and I'm just I'm like panicking crab walk clicking. What's this?
Nope? Sure enough, it's my fucking daughter waking up shit But like it was the most terrifying thing I mean it always is it always is and it's the worst and I do not sleep on my back because of that It's why I bring this up because fucking kids as vampires. I don't know kids and vampires Oh, yeah, kids are terrifying kids are terrifying. That's why and they run movies So I'm asked you do vampires have a soldier they go to heaven hell We don't really know no the hunger and thirst is that like an addiction you think it's like something you like you just feel deep down like you need I really think it's much different than food man I mean maybe like a ramped up version of food, but I mean so was the last time you didn't eat for a day So Buddhist vampire could like straight up own that shit and just not eat for a while Maybe or like a Jewish vampire could do it for a what's that thing where they stop eating stuff a fast fast a lot of religion I think yeah, I don't know why said Jewish I was a young poor, but I don't think that has anything to do with fasting Nope Do they feel pain we said me?
I don't know if they feel pain. I feel like no, okay, or maybe they do instead of drinking blood Could you have a blood transfusion and or would that cure your vampirism? I don't think it's a cure for vampirism even a complete blood transfusion. No because I mean obviously the disease is in your blood, right?
If you're a vampire, well, it's either a disease or a curse. Mmm. There's a virus or is a virus with their like no No, no, we have this antibiotics to take this just stop being a vampire So I will take a vampire. Did you ever get some of those and save them?
For when I'm tired of being a vampire, which is never so what do you do? I'm gonna talk about moves your games first man Let's start with games because there's not as many vampire games. I don't feel like yeah, fair enough There used to be a game. I used to love called soul reaver.
Oh look at the game. Yes There's multiple ones of those yes, I wish they would remake that for some reason I remember it being so fucking fun I don't remember what the game plays like I remember like you stab people and hold them up and well Soul reaver especially because there was like two versions There's like the there's like the alive version and then there's like the soul version and one of them is like behind the veil Kind of thing and you can like steal souls. Yeah, you fight spectral items And then there's like the alive version of cane where you feed off you where you're a vampire and you're limited by the physical world I just remember that being the funnest remember you could like switch between them I really don't know what's up it man. I really don't remember lost a lot in that fucking game I just remember that being one of the funnest vampire games ever played super dope There's supposed to be one coming out.
I think for PlayStation really it might just be called vampire There's something that looks super dope that suppose we come out. Yeah, that was like my number one on the games Well, we're gonna take pause real quick. We're back. Yeah, so maybe again games It's all reaver which is really a sequel for from like a C cane, which was a ps1 game I think okay soul reavers when I'm thinking of then yes all reaver that was the sick sequel to legacy came Yeah, I believe I played both I played so because I love the first one so much because I think I don't think the The guy in the you know that was dead was Cane I think Cane was like his evil twin brother or something.
I can't remember this I mean because like games were talking 15 years ago. Yeah or more So the soul reaver guy was like trying to like stop Cane stop Cane and like and his legacy like rebuild his soul I guess yeah, I was like body was all like torn pieces and you like you could see through him Yeah, I just remember he was like very undead. Yeah, it's not me like Can't forget about the classic bro, Castlevania Of course Castlevania the number one if I can Dracula hunter game Simon film up. Do you're watching a Nintendo cartoon back in the day?
No, I don't think so what was it called not Nintendo power, but it was something like that It's like the power kid or something. I I could never get into Castlevania. I loved like the idea behind Castlevania It was so hard dude. It was too hard.
That's what it was hard as a kid You're like I can't why can't I jump over the space? Oh because you need the white potion and you got to take it to this place to get the red potion and then come back I got to drag it was like fake castle like one time, you know, like you're princesses We lived it we beat it and it's like oh wait no that was a what there's still more game I think so isn't the best. Sorry you still have you know 12 hours more of trying to survive with three lives I just remember being like I had to buy the Nintendo magazine to read like what the fuck am I supposed to do here? Because I'm stuck at this game because back then I mean you didn't have anything to go off of now And it's just like you look it up on the internet thought I had everything I was supposed to have but apparently I can't get past this point without something else and it's like health potions But you had to use certain items in certain areas right because like you had like the fire bottles that would kill stuff that came along the ground You had the crucifix boomerang well, there's other things like there was like a holy water Every time I hold the crucifix I'm like I feel like I could kill harpies with this weren't there like crystals or something You had to take to certain areas to get blessed or something.
I might be a member of other game I might be thinking of like has me two or three or whatever I don't remember but they were just all so fucking difficult. You know there was a not too long God, I want to say it was Xbox maybe original Xbox where there was like a It was 360 there was like a like an arcade game where it was like a reimagined version of Castlevania 2d Castlevania Do you ever play with 3d Castlevania? Oh, yeah, yeah, I think that's a piece of shit. Yeah, yeah I played the most recent one I think it was where like I was like I forget was there's some part where you're like running from the werewolf in the in the woods and like they had to fight I'm just like it was bad some game should be 2d.
Yeah, because the whip didn't translate. Yeah, you had to like drag the enemy Or something like I'm in here, but I need to hit here and it's like yeah, I like it Like just just make it to the game. What's what's your favorite vampire game? I gotta say the Elder Scrolls No, no that spreads across all of them really which okay, so I played a blivion Don't remember vampires in that one.
There's been vampires in all of them. Oh, yes, sweet even way back We'll see here's thing in like a dagger fall I always go back to that because I started with that had some crazy stuff like one of the skills was climbing So you literally just climb up a wall like a sheer rock wall Yeah, I believe you can still have some of that so if like you camped outside like if you you know waiting outside There's a certain percentage you get attacked by a werewolf of vampire and you know contract the disease right? But yeah in Skyrim the most reason one obviously everyone displayed right um who's all DLC you could either be a vampire or werewolf Well, they had vampires in there before the DLC you can still become a vampire you had to find the cure But there wasn't like a mission for it. No, the only mission was to get the cure Yeah, you didn't like to cure so you could like join the vampires or join the werewolves And it gives you a deal sees it gave you like a full you know range of powers and stuff Yeah, which honestly is kind of laying because it forced you into third person.
Yeah when you became yeah You're like this huge hulking like bat beast type thing. Yeah, it's gross Although when you weren't in like full I mean that's just a werewolf one But when you weren't in full vampire mode like you still gained a lot of abilities like you moved really fast or like You didn't lose stamina at night or something. Yeah, there's all three what's up? But another game I played like on the NES and also I collected the cards was monsters in my pocket dude I don't know what that is so there's these cards that you'd buy You know like packs of cards and they have like these different monsters on them.
You like Pokemon? Yeah, but it wasn't the game. It was just like a collect card collection Okay, and it'd be like you know golems and vampires and like guards go kids or something Yeah, but there's a whole series of cards in their monsters Yeah, and I played the game on the NES just because I love the card game So I'm not card game, but I love the card so I ended up getting that I do vaguely remember that and actually I think I've bought a pack Not too long ago at some weird consignment store that happened to have packs of monsters in my pocket cards. It's not a surprise I mean I covered more than just vampires, but it really hasn't been any great vampire games.
No, there hasn't not at least not recently I don't think so whether you're or a vampire you hunt vampires neither one has been you would think you think the whole zombie genre Right led to other monster hunting games. Well, yeah, just other monster games. Yeah, but it hasn't like is there is there like a vampire RPG? That I'm not thinking of I mean not I can think of off the top of my head and there's Vincent in Final Fantasy, but I mean they all I mean every RPG like I mentioned like every time yeah Every RPG has vampires and it seems like but none of them are like this is the like you are the I mean like legacy cane or soul reaver Where you are a vampire your hunting vampires?
Specifically or my wife's favorite blood rain. I guess there's witcher. Yeah true. There's not that's not specifically vampires It's no it's almost I know blood rain got turned into movies it did I don't but the game was great I don't remember either one did you could like drain somebody's blood from like who's kind of like the original legacy of Kane Or you like drain somebody's blood through the air you like suck suck the blood out their body from like 12 feet away And they just be like whoa and then she jump in the air and do the splits with her swords and then just do like a cross attack on your face I don't remember it.
I know it was yeah, no, but it just I think anybody played it but us that's all I think I'm sure I played it I think I remember playing it, but it doesn't stick with me. It was a pretty fun game It was a better game than it was a movie well. I mean as far as vampire movies there's a shit done Oh, yeah, and there's some great ones. There are some great ones.
What's your favorite? Oh, I have a hard time picking a favorite Because this favorite me the one that scares me the most or is favorite the one that I enjoy watching over and over because it's hilarious I feel like there's a personal question. I'm task yourself What we do shadows? Oh fucking let them have you dude?
I'm gonna have to go with that because it's funny and not terrifying if I went terrifying let the right one in that's a pretty good one That's one with the kid right the kids. I don't remember being a kid in it. Okay. What's what's the one?
What's the one with the girl who from kickass when she was a little vampire? I think I wasn't left right one. Okay. Okay.
I don't know. No, no, no, not right night. I like friend I think I think it's like the right one of it at the same time. I don't think that's the right thing Yeah, you should look this up when you're writing stuff down you can pause if you want no just go ahead and what's your favorite Maybe my favorite vampire movie is thirst which we've discussed this dude before Janwick Park or Park Jan hoop depending on how you interpret Korean names, but the same guy who directed old boy Yeah, there's a vampire movie about a priest who was visiting people with this strange virus And he volunteers to take what could be the cure he ends up a vampire.
No shit. Yeah, so then he's like struggling with you know He's a priest but you know he has to kill people to survive and then he becomes obsessed with like his best friend's wife It's really good movie. That's probably my favorite. I don't know if I mentioned before but you know let me in oh let me in Yes, I don't know that one.
I never watched it because I was like oh basically You don't know if it's any good Well, it's this little boy becomes friends with this little girl and comes to find out this little girl's a fucking vampire and Their friends, but same time she's not soon. No, no, no, and she's out there killing people It just seemed I like I told you kids as monsters are terrifying because I have a kid let me in you know I haven't seen this I've never seen either with Chloe Grace Marettes Yeah, that's what I was thinking of and a really skinny guy But some of my other favorite movies. I mean I gotta go John Carpenter vampires. Well, that's a good one I forgot about that one.
I love that movie where their vampire hunters and they're like ripping people out of the building That's good I mean because that's how modern-day vampires would do it I really think they would for sure like okay I got this hook to a wrench in the chest yank him out and do the sunlight next next nice Lost boys bro lost boys obviously I mean that's that's so strange too because like that's one of the greats It's mostly about like the bad boy cool kids and Corey ham like just wanted to be one of the bad boy cool kids and turns out They kill people yeah That scene where they're driving through fog and they jump off the cliff and it's like holy shit And they're like like is he flying is he vampire? They're all kind of floating and made keep her southern immediately cool. Yeah A book I just bought which the movie is because all Stephen King movies are yeah Yeah, they're not a lot. Oh, you know, I've never read or seen it the vampire in that is very nose for ought to wish Yeah, yeah, I don't know anything about that book.
Yeah, it's vampire book. No shit I didn't know anything about oh some other movies are down Blade blade I mean comic books, but the movies is what you probably most people know before the comics The daywalker yeah, I see a day Walker well because his mother was turned to a vampire and then he was born before the transformation was complete Is that what happened to or would get a vampire and pregnant a non-vampire? Mmm in the movie his mother got attacked by vampire while she was in labor basically got a vampire and then gave birth What a piece of shit. Hey, you're hungry.
You gotta eat dude. I might change my answer play three Priest oh man. It's a very underrated movie. It is yeah, it is like futuristic But yeah, yeah, it's like priest versus the vampires like he goes to this vampire colony and to make sure the vampires aren't getting out basically Yeah, well like the vampires take over and like the priests are that's one where they're like at the end They're on a train.
Yeah, okay. They have like it's Paul Bettany. That's right. You know vision.
It's really good. I was gonna say the albino from Yeah What was the other one? Fright night Fright night. Yeah, have you seen the remake the remix actually the only one I've seen what I've never seen the reason Really, but I thought the new one was great the new one is good I used to hate what's it face?
Confirmal pretty much anything after phone booth. I'm fine with yeah, but it was actually a pretty underrated good movie is it? I think I was just tired of hearing about Colin Farrell and then of course the horrible daredevil move although He was bullseye so I should just go back and watch it for his performance him is bullseye was pretty good Separate separate topic. Yeah for sure so um oh What's the one where they've been thinking of Fright night?
Yeah, I mean it's the old school Friday with um That's definitely a Friday where Van Helsing is in Fright night. I never saw the original. Yeah, although I do like the Van Helsing movie with you Check I do too. I do too.
I forgot about that one. Yeah, it's it's good. It's not it's not bad not too cheesy And it's not too over the top and it has that not shit. Oh my god.
How did we forget underworld? Oh, I didn't forget I just didn't run it. Okay, I totally forgot it. Yeah, I mean, they're not great movies, but they're not I've seen all of them And they're all pretty terrible, but you keep watching them.
This row back one is really good Yeah, I think it's the third one or something where it's like a second or third one. Yeah where they like go back in time So to how it all started basically the war that was really interesting. Did you see the new Dracula? Um the one with the guy?
Dracula 2000 no, I didn't see that one The real Dracula with Gary Oldman and went on a rider Graham Stoker's Dracula the original from like six like seven No, that's not what I'm either. There's one in like the later thousands. Nope. It's the late 2000s like it's close to 2099 or something No, but it's almost 20 anyways the original branch of her Dracula was pretty terrifying as a kid to watch.
Oh, same here Can't read can't read so I don't know why I couldn't think it was named And Van Helsing was what's his nuts? Anything happens, right? Yeah, yeah, it was yeah one on a ride It was mean a Dracula untold Dracula untold to them for I thought it's pretty good to a different take on Dracula mentioned earlier Yeah, yeah, I like I like their view vampires even though it was like Dracula and some of these more powerful minions were human-like But then you also had like totally animalistic vampires under his rule. I understand you've seen the TV show I think it's called the virus.
Yeah, it's an FX show It's basically like what if vampirism was a virus and it's pretty fucking terrifying sounds good. Yeah, it's pretty good Dracula the undead and that what it's called. I don't know the comedy with Lisa Leslie. Oh Leslie.
Yeah, I think it is I think it's called like Dracula undead or something that it's pretty funny. Yeah, I forgot that I'm about a fucking black you know, black you know, nice. It's good. There's just so many vampires so many vampire movies It's anything where was when we eventually do werewolves which I'm sure we were quite a few There's way more vampires though man.
I can't wait to talk to you about some of my favorite I'm where will movies because I for some reason connected to werewolf movies more than I can take the vampire movies I didn't like it as much the first time and I've only seen half of it a second time There's a movie with Tom Hiddleston who's Loki. Okay, thank you and Shit what's her name? She was hella in recent Thor movie imagine her face Dammit, you just look at that until the swing and it Kind of like when we were talking about at the beginning like what would you do with all your time? It kind of answers those questions like Tom Hiddleston or you know, he's like a rock star and has been for like forever Let's kind of like he and till the Swinton like are together for a while apart for a while And it kind of gets into like a vampire relationship that has been going on for like a thousand years Did you ever see Dracula 2000?
I mean just the fact that it was called that that's kind of what happened like I'm gonna be a rock star Yeah, but it's real. It's really well done. Yeah, okay Queen of the damned that was like fourth blade movie or something. No, that was completely independent movie.
Oh, it's been off though No, I don't think so totally is I don't think it was his own thing whatever it was terrible I mean, I don't know how we can continue to talk without bringing up from dust of dawn. It's fantastic I mean crotch gun some high extities. It's all great stuff And that's that's when I really couldn't stand George Glenn. It's always great to see someone you're like I hate I do anything you're still pretty good.
I Honestly later. I didn't like George. Yeah. Yeah.
I think it was up in the air with anacondric. That's pretty good movie Well, I'm not secretly in love with no, no, no, sorry. I don't know why just like I'm obsessed with that shit for somebody's She's all right, maybe because she's pocket size. I feel like I could carry her around more obsessed with a what's your name?
Parks and Rec. Oh, I reply. Yeah. Yeah, she doesn't watch that new move the one where she's a nun what fuck are you talking about the little hours?
What I wish I hadn't even said it because it's fucking awful. Oh, then I won't watch it. Yeah, I still have to be comedy What it was like Dave and Zack need wedding guests or something like that? That's pretty funny.
I haven't seen that yet That's funny. I know it is. I just haven't seen it yet. That's both of them.
Yeah, maybe we should watch together naked Okay, and what's that call? I don't know. I don't know. Let's not talk about it And I'm comfortable.
I think we covered just about every vampire maybe of course someone's gonna be like dude. You don't cover this one Yeah, of course there's more. I mean, there's so many you know What's the one movie where they're like in a wax museum, but the things are coming to life house wax? No, it's like an old I don't think that's what it is might be and like a one of them is like the werewolf comes life and Dracula comes life And I mean also monster squad can't forget that movie.
That's mentioned the original Dracula fucking Bella. Look, Ozzy Yeah, good pretty amazing. Yeah, him him Bella. Go see Vincent Price is a price for some reason like the Masters of Horror Yeah, and who's the other go see and Marty?
Oh Damn it. Who's the guy that's on the Boris Karloff? Yeah, Boris Karloff. Yeah.
Yeah Boris and What's this that's in like every old or movie? There's another guy that was like always the wolf man. I can't remember his there's yeah, there was like a three or four dudes They were the damn movie. Yeah, well you mentioned it before you're a big fan of the Adams family Oh, yeah, more tissue.
Mm-hmm, which I mean might as well be a vampire, right? Oh, she was I guess she's a weird person I think she's weird people. Yeah, just cool shit and a Monsters, you know, you know like monsters fucking hate the monsters. They're boring and stupid.
What about the funny uncle? Who's a vampire? Who grandpa monster? Yeah, I'll give a pass.
Yeah, he was the best. I'll give grandpa monster pass just cuz he was a smartass Jewish guy Any good cartoon vampires you can think of no any anime vampires that you can let's talk about was it was it named Obvious Spider-Man villain. Yeah, which I feel like I feel like they could do really good to move right now They could or did you ever read that? I didn't realize he was a spider-man villain.
I thought he was an ex-woman Exverse series with the vampires. Mm-hmm. I'll have to show you even has a bunch of like encounters really Yeah, it's pretty dope. It's the later version of X-Force 2 It's like the the darker one where like cyclops set aside all these people like Laura in Archangel to kill people jubilee not jubilee I'm pretty sure it's ex woman pretty sure I saw jubilee sushi restaurant this last week.
Sorry what? Yeah, she'd like you know big glasses big hair and a yellow jacket knee-length yellow trench coat. No shit I was just like hey, jubilee It's a different accent. No, okay good.
No, we're sick everybody is jubilee. I can make sparkles Well, I think we pretty much fucking locked it down fucking vampire. Lock this shit down. I won't say something I'm thinking about getting we didn't mention interview, but I mean do we have to mention interview everyone's fucking fantastic We'd mention parts of it.
Yeah, if you haven't seen a view of vampire then probably shouldn't be friends I mean, you know if you sleep your vampires master's throat and feed into crocodiles gets a little pissed. Yeah Dude, I was the fucking most fucked up part. She's like yeah, those kids were already dead. You're drinking dead blood you're fucked up I'm gonna say you're throat and I'm gonna feed you to fucking crocodiles I know when Antonio Banderas locks the chicken and the lady like on the on the balcony and they have to like In the Senate or whatever.
Yeah, that's pretty mess up I mean still it's like that just is the problem is the kids killing people is what bothers every time God anyways one thing I've been thinking about getting I know I talk about D&D a lot I know I do I'm gonna bring it up for sure Castle Ravenloft, which was like a huge D&D campaign about the vampire and castle I basically Castlevania book often if you want to imagine being a vampire, you know, you're for hunting to vampires But anyways, there's a board game. Let me think about getting it go get it. You're gonna play. Nope.
I'll go. I guess one to five players suck play by myself Anyways, thanks for listening everybody If you have any suggestions about topics that you think we should cover call us because you know our numbers Yeah, I mean our are you know post on you're gonna fucking and suggested anyway I mean like posting Twitter or sharing on Facebook or literally anything to tell anybody anything would be great Josh Craig Chris. Yeah guys. You appreciate that you listen, but yeah Like you know share us let people know you and they probably will too tell people about it.
Don't be scared. Anyway, I'm right I'm doing route Me around