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Grab yours [email protected] Amazon and select retailers nationwide. On today's part of my take week 17 of the NFL we're going to start with fastest two minutes. We are going to talk about every single game. There have been some eliminations that have taken place in this room.
A lot of moving and shaking. Teams are their seasons are officially over and we're going to do who's back the week. Football Guy we talked about college football as well. The best college football playoffs we've ever seen.
Semifinals. I like how people were tweeting like is it a hot take to say these are the best semifinals ever seen? No, they usually always suck in. Those were two incredible games.
So we're going to talk about all that live football to get to the springtime thaw is finally here. Flowers are blooming, days are longer. We're saying yes to more plans and finally getting outside. Running, walking, just moving again.
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Let us be the first to wish you a happy New Year and a blessed jumpsuit. January to you. We start in Tampa Bay where Tom Wayne Brady looked like he wanted a choke a pitch as he continues to play. Who's on the offensive line anyway?
This year the Panthers had some life as painfully shy Smith asked Sam Darnold, pick me, pick me hooking up for a touchdown and the game turned when Mike Sean Evans went on a heater, catching three touchdowns and saying look at us. The the Bucs is NFC south champs. Who would have thought? Well, literally everyone.
But it was a lot harder than we thought at the beginning of the season. The Bucs are NFC south champs, Bucks 30, Panthers 24 over to Kansas City where Russell and Flo Wilson said it's hard out here for a sip as interim head coach Jerry Mossberg had him lining up in shot that all afternoon. Pat Rick Riley Mahomes has the same amount of touchdown as Kate Upton's boobs with three. The Chiefs are waiting for the playoffs as before you go girl, Bell scored a touchdown and George Michael Carloftis submitted another game with a Sack.
The Chiefs 24 the Broncos Chiefs 27, Broncos 24 we don't make mistakes on this. Show up to Foxborough as Matt Efron goes back and forth between looking like a serial killer, taking out other players knees and looking really good like he did on Sunday. Teddy Bridge, one of those, couldn't make up for Jason Sanders ugly kicks and had to leave the game with a broken finger as Skyler Hunter S. Thompson came into the game and helped the Dolphins playoff chances go gonzo.
Don't look now, Geej but the Patriots have a shot at the playoffs. The elite 18. Patriots 23, Dolphins 41 we go down to DC where stop me if you've heard this before, but Deshaun Watson got penalized for illegal touching. But Washington on the other hand couldn't get their hands on jump as he ran for 104 yards.
Amari mini Cooper doesn't miss his full size Derek Carr as he was able to score twice. As for the Commanders, their playoff hopes came and winced. And Sean Taylor Heinecke might as well bid a statue on the sidelines. But no arms or legs.
Don't let the Browns get hot. Cleveland 24, Washington 24, Browns 10 I was knocked off. Go fucker Shot San Diego. It's a new year for us too.
In the melan they honored Lawrence Taylor pregame and during the game as Kayvon Thibodeau made it snow with angels. Nick Foles also contributed to the tribute of LT by completing exactly eight balls. Speaking of balls, Ryan Zabal looks to be the coach of the year as he's made average guys like I'm Richie James bitch. Cold blooded giants 38, Colts 10 and we head down to Atlanta for the game that had zero playoff implications as a Cardinals went to David Blau blow flower wheels to try to rub up the Cardinals offense that's fallen off a cliff.
Desmond Critter I refuse to eat the bugs. Boom was sneaking around the Cardinals backyard as J.J. rottweiler's got back dogging him still as Arthur Smith defeats Cliff Jigsbury in a battle of the two most attractive coaches in the NFL. The darkest 40.
The Cardinals are 19th place up to the not so frozen tundra where the incessant ads are once again being stuffed down our throat as a certain felonious insurance spokesman discount double checked his way to a win. Jair Alexander called the jukes that he received the expense of Justin Jefferson in week one of fluke as he hit the green early and off in the wide receiver's face. Hey hey boo. Hey Fej.
Have you heard this? Have you seen this? They put up a statue in Minnesota in its Kirkowitzki Cousins throwing a perfect interception to the packers as he had three on the day I ate that motherfucker. Boom.
Don't look now but the Green Bay packers in a win and in scenario in Week 18 with Detroit Lions bury the Bears Packers 41, Vikings 17 over to the desert where Jarrett Storm or Situm got the nod as Derek Carr has been parked in the repo lot. Good news for the quarterback Devonte I'm walking here. Was actually running free all Sunday after scoring two touchdowns. Darren, what you want to do?
Want to be a Waller shotgall? Little Fowler chipped in on the scoring and the Niners were officially on the roast. Until Brock Sturdy righted the ship. As San Fran fans are Brock hard now that they're Brock 40 with a 1 seed.
Niners 37, 34 standing on the corner. Jameis Winston down in Nola. Such a fine sight to see. It's the Birds, my Lord, struggling to score.
And now they might not be the top seed. Come on, man, chew. Get that dog in you or else. The Eagles going home play all weekend too.
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All new Stellable Coffee canned lattes now [email protected] or subscribe on Amazon for 10% off. Okay, week 17 in the books. We actually will talk about Raven Steelers at the end because we're taping a little early so we can go watch the game with Jersey Jerry on the stream. A lot of things happened.
A lot of things happened in this room. We watch a shitload football. We talk about college football playoffs as well after all the games. But.
But let's get. Let's just get right into it. I try to order it in terms of playoff implications. So talking about the games that actually meant something.
And then we'll get to the games that mean absolutely nothing. Shout out to Cardinals and Falcons. I actually took zero notes and didn't watch a second of that game. But let's start.
I have one note on that game. Big Bucs 30, Panthers 24. The Tampa Bay Bucs have finally after like it was a long, drawn out process. It was a war of attrition.
Someone had to win the NFC South. They do it Come from behind, win the NFC South. Tom Brady was throwing deep balls to Mike Evans. The Bucks are your NFC south champs.
They are still a bad football team, but they're in the playoffs and hosting a playoff game on wild card weekend. So, yeah, that's 14 straight playoff appearances for Tom Brady. Just crazy to think about. Crazy.
Insane. And so if you're Tom Brady, banners fly forever. You won the division, NFC South. It was all worth it.
Oh, everything you've done in the last nine, 10 months, it worked out. You won the division. I will say this was the happiest, I think I've seen him in a very long time. Because not only did they win the division, going to the playoffs, their seat is set.
There's nothing like he can. The Bucs can rest basically everyone. Week 18, they should get Ryan Jensen back in center. Maybe they have him play, but he looked happy, I think because they won the NFC South.
And also it was the first time that their offense looks somewhat competent in forever. Throwing deep balls to Mike Evans. He threw a 50 yard touchdown, a 61 yard touchdown. M.
Evans had 207 yards. It was like. It was. It was.
Tom Brady won the game. And it's been a lot of. Tom Brady does enough to win a game, but the defense has a chip in. They win like 14 to 13.
He won this game. Top rate. We're up today and we've been using the F word a lot for the Tampa Bay bucking years this year. Not frauds, not frogs, not frogs, not quotes.
The other F word. Flawed. We've been calling flawed all year. Right.
But it looks like the Bucs have actually looked at what's made them flawed and then realized there are certain things that we can do good. Let's lean into those things in a way like by knowing how bad they can be, they're going to the playoffs being like, okay, we've learned a lot of lessons this year. And as if it turns out that still throwing deep balls to Mike Evans, it works because he's. I think he's.
I think it was like a little dinged up earlier in the year when he had some hamstring issues. He's a little bit slow, but now it's like he does look like Mike Evans three years ago, by the way. Mike Evans. Just as a side note, I think that everyone probably doesn't realize just how good Mike Evans is because there were a lot of years it was with Jameis and not great Bucs teams.
And then, you know, Tom Brady comes. It's like it's Tom Brady. Mike Evans now is second all time. Only one other person is or only two other people have done this.
Tim Brown is tied with Mike Evans nine consecutive 1000 yard receiving years. The only person ahead of him is Jerry Rice with 11 years. Mike Evans is a Hall of Famer, which is crazy because it doesn't feel like he's had a very good career. But then when you stop and you look at it like holy shit, He's.
He's got 83 touchdowns or sorry, 81 touchdowns in his career. If he gets to 100, he'll be top 10 all time in touchdowns. Everyone in the top 15 is in the hall every single year he's been in the NFL. Been the NFL nine years.
Every year he's gotten over a thousand yards and he's not even 30 yet. I feel like he's also pretty overlooked piece of the whole Johnny Menzel situation. Yeah, the Johnny football magic that happened in College Station that had a lot to do with him just throwing ball up there and Mike Evans being able to catch. But he's one of those players.
I think if you ask just any regular football fan, like he's a Hall of Famer, they would. I never really thought of that. Maybe. But if he has even two more years at this standard, which again he's not even turned third yet.
He's like a no Doubt or Hall of Famer. Yeah, I mean it's great. His only weakness is getting into fights with CD Duce. Yes.
That's about it. Exactly. Join the playoffs. I mean if the Eagles.
He's on the Birds, right? Yes. Yeah. Is he hurt?
He is currently hurt. They need to get him healthy for the playoffs in case he plays the Bucks because that's, that's the only way that they can max slide to it. I have something I want to admit. Because we own the trust tree, I think I'm now starting to believe the Bucks again.
Like I can actually see it. I've actually as bad as I've been with the Bucks to begin here, I've actually been very right about them in the last like month and a half where I got off of them for a little bit there and then I went back on them this week. I now think that like the path is there. The Cowboys for Tom Br owns they're getting Ryan Jensen being Christian Morris coming back.
Ryan Jensen set to come back. Like that's been their biggest problem is their offensive lines gave him no time. Their defense has always been pretty good. I'm.
I'm starting to think that this might be a Bucks run again. So this is what's going to happen. It's going to be. It's going to be Bucks, Cowboys, first round.
Cowboys are going to lose somehow. Tom Brady has never lost to the Cowboys before. Yeah, Tom Brady has never lost the Cowboys before. Bucs, Bucks, Dallas in the first round.
McCarthy fired Sean Payton, Head coach, Dallas Cowboys I'm just letting you know, read the news before the news. Cowboys are getting the one. Yeah, you've been talking about this because you just. Your anger for Philadelphia just never leaves your brain.
You're like, cowboys getting one, Cowboys getting. Hey, here's the thing. So it's going to be Philadelphia. Philadelphia's going to beat them.
So whatever the Cowboys do, it doesn't really matter. Cowboys fact of fiction. Fact of fiction. The Eagles are going to beat the Giant next weekend.
All right, so the Giants are hungry, dog. Fine. Okay, done. Then the Eagles will definitely win.
Done. Yeah. So the Giants might not be favored. I don't think so.
You never know. Let's look. Whose lines anyway? It's in Philadelphia.
Correct. Max. Yes. Yeah.
Hank's the fucking worst. He's been on his troll shit today. He came in, he's like, I bet against PFT talking about the Cowboys. And then he's like, I bet on the Bears.
Like they're trying to lose. They're trying to lose. Be friends. Whose lines is anyway, it's not out yet.
Exactly. Okay. Never know. Giants could be favorites.
No, no. Fiction, fiction. They cannot be. They will not be.
When the line comes out, if the Eagles are underdogs, I will go up the top of this building and jump off. Okay, There we go. They have to be. Yeah.
Line coming out. Underdogs. There's just my life. You get on my back.
We'll do it as like a backpack. Okay? Got it. Maybe if I turn around quick enough, you'll brace the fallen off.
I don't think that's how it's gonna work. I think if one of us is gonna. What if you jump off a bridge and throw a rock? Like if you throw a rock underneath, like you let a rock go first.
Because I always say hitting the water, hitting the water is what hurts. But if you just drop a big rock like before, you. That would break the bridge. When you're building the Brooklyn Bridge, you should throw your hammer down if you fell off, if you're one of the iron workers.
But since Big Cat weighs significantly more than we fell, he's gonna drop faster than you. Right. So I can just land on him or do I just spread out and have more? What's the line?
What's the line? The line is 14. Suck my dickhead, you fucking idiot. Go chop off the bill.
Cowboys one seed, right? Cowboys one. See anything can happen. He's just on his troll shit.
The Bucks. I am now believing in the Bucks. I don't know how, I don't know how, like why, what has changed? But I think it was the Deeples.
Like the Bucks offense. I watched every single Bucks game with Stephen Chey and singing that gambling game and they all go the exact same way where they just get like they'll get first and goal on the five and they'll gain two yards and then try to kick a field goal. This was the first time they were actually throwing it deep and they actually look like the Bucks. The first time they look like the Bucks.
Week one when they pounded the Cowboys. The only issue I have is that Tide Bulls is going to at some point. Yeah, he's going to turn back to Tide Bulls, Byron left, which is probably cost himself a lot of money this year. But oh yeah, I really like showing people how bad that he was like because before this going into the season he was like the next hot name for head coach.
Now it's like, oh, we found out too much about you. What was that Todd Bowles had even in a win? I think it was actually it was Sometime in the first half he had his kicker try like 55 yarder. He does not have even close to that type of leg.
And just flipped the field for the Panthers too. I'm happy now that the Panthers can officially be my dark horse team next year that didn't make playoffs that's going to make the playoffs because they are like they're way overmatched by the box. From a pure talent standpoint. They were in this game sand.
Darnold looked pretty good. They can now potentially I'm just going to start like doing fake. I've been doing fake trades in my head for like last three weeks. They could potentially trade up to the first or second pick.
Second pick with the Bears. Get Bryce Younger, C.J. stroud. They have pieces.
They get a coach. Yeah, that's gonna be the big questions. What coach they get or do they try Sam Darnold get next year? Yeah, they could try Sard.
If you do get C.J. stroud or Bryce Young, you can probably send him for a year because Sam Darnold look pretty good today and he's faster. I don't know what it is about Sam Darnold in these last like three weeks, he actually looks like a mobile quarterback. And then New York jets have got to be just kicking themselves.
If they still had Sam Darnold, they probably didn't play off. It's a difference maker. Yeah. They actually had like the perfect season to set up the next season where they were in every game.
They could have gone won the NFC south as of this morning and they still. Because the NFC south is so bad, they're going to have a top 10 pick. It's like you couldn't script it better. And they traded Christian Cat for more picks.
You couldn't script it better for them to be a team that goes from out of the playoffs to in the playoffs in one year. So what do you do if you're tapper, if you're the owner? Do you make Steve Wilkes actually like interview to be the head coach? I think so.
Does he just put on the tape? I don't know how. We have got to be power move. Just walk in, set up a projector, press play and leave.
Yeah. What you do here? Yeah. Why'd you do this?
Why didn't you run the ball against the Steelers? No, I'd just be like, look, look what I did. Oh, you're saying Steve Wilson, Steve Wilkes comes in, press play. Here's what I did while I was coach.
Yeah, he did. I mean he brought them back from being one of the biggest jokes in the league. When that rule is still there. I've got a theory it's jumping ahead a little bit to the managers game.
Okay. I think Rivera wants to go back to North Carolina. Will they have him? They're probably taking like a front office position.
I mean, they still do love them. Because I've never seen it before in my entire life where a coach gets a press conference after they get fired. Yeah. Remember he met and he was like, we did a lot of things here.
I think he won the nfc. He quoted winning the NFC south like whatever three years in a row. One of those years they won it at 79. Yeah, he just.
His key still works. They'll probably have him in whatever. Yeah. Last thing I have is Tom Brady.
Now joins the club of 40 year olds with 400 yards passing in a game. The club is six members. It's Warren Moon, Brett Favre, Tom Brady, Tom Brady, Tom Brady and Tom Brady. So he's now got it four times.
He's the only one to do it four times. Yeah, he's the only one doing it. Thank you. Stat hole for that.
Tom Brady probably Also do it when he's 50. If I was Tom Brady, what I do, I'd retire whenever I want to retire, which, I mean, never could be next year. And then I come back for one last, last season after I turn 50, I just get your body, like, completely, totally healed. You do nothing but, like, but yoga and TP12.
You eat all the avocados that you want. No night shades. You're in perfect condition. Come back when you're 50 years old just to prove that you can still play in the NFL.
I don't think there's any chance he's retiring. I think this type of game where he won the NFC south going back to the playoffs, through the bombs, that's like. That's like when you golf and, you know, on the 18th hole, you just crush a drive. Man, that was fun.
You're all ready to quit golf. You're asking $1,000 a year. I don't think he's retiring either, because he's coming back and going to Vegas. Yeah, there's a lot of.
Lot of fanfic out there, Hank. So are you all in on the Bucks making a, let's say NFC championship game would be them punching above what they've been this year and a pretty crazy run because I don't think anyone expects them to go all the way to the NFC championship game because they just haven't been good all year. Yeah, I think they could be the Eagles. I think they could be rookie Brock party that easily.
Yeah, I could see them win that game. Yeah, it's right. Think about it. Tom Brady against Brock Purdy.
Don't overthink it. Championship DVD. Game one, the 49ers. Oh, my God.
They win by 100. Tom Brady looks old. Looks old. Wait, so who.
Who playoff. Who wins? Who can't they be? Dallas at home will be tough, but I think they can do it.
That's one team that they should be able to be. Wait, when Dallas gets the 1 seed. Yep, got it. They could beat the Vikings.
So, yeah, I'm all. So, Justin, Dallas gets the one seed, which you've declared has happened. Yep. That would be their toughest matchup.
Dallas the 1 seed. Fanfic on our side of team. I would actually be afraid of the Lions if that was the Bucks. Yeah.
Yeah. The Lions are like they will outscore the Buccaneers. Also the packers, maybe. Is Jalen Harris coming back?
Yeah, he is. Yeah. You're on your troll. I'm genuinely curious.
Let's go to the next. Why didn't he play today? I don't think LaFleur wants to face Ombre again. Play.
I think he's so deep inside the vortex that the Matt part is brain. Yeah. He'll just psych himself out. LaFleur goes up the top poles before he's like, let's just not do any fields.
Let's just keep it on the setup. Yeah. Tell you what, kickers aren't really part of the game. Right.
Let's have this like men. I don't want to be tempted to just start going for field goals. All right, Next up, Patriots 23, Dolphins 21. Can I just real quick.
Yeah, go back. If he does play, if the battle of the bays happens again and lafleur has to coach against Tampa Bay, there's. There's definitely a chance at some point in that game, Matt LaFleur will think about us. Oh, I would say the whole week.
He'll be like. He'll have a decision. And our stupid faces will pop into his head. Yeah.
And be like, wait, do I. Am I just using this despite those assholes? If. If.
Now, this is a very big gift because the packers have to get in the playoffs and the seating really doesn't work out. It would. I think they only meet in the NFC championship game. Right.
But if that did happen, I will PFT and I both will pay an awl. Will buy four seats in direct line of Matt LaFleur across the field. And you can bring. You'll have to bring big cardboard cutouts of us.
Just hold it up on any field goal decision. Yep. So he can just see our pieces. And Hank's gonna match.
And Hank will match. Game time. Okay, Next up, Patriots 23, Dolphins 21. Hank doesn't want the Patriots to win.
He doesn't want them to go to the playoffs. But they are now in a win and get in situation. The Dolphins season has completely fallen apart. Five straight losses.
Teddy Bridgewater broke his finger on an interception. I think Skyler Thompson. It's just all falling apart. And now the Patriots.
Somehow, this is what I was alluding to when I said for the show. I turned to PFD earlier today, and I was like, it's so fucked up that this season looks so different. And now we're sitting here. And the Dolphins could get eliminated.
The jets have been eliminated. Bears were eliminated in fucking September, and the Commanders got eliminated today. And now Hank is sitting here, doesn't even want to be in the playoffs. This sucks.
And he's gonna be in the playoffs. This actually hurts. It hurts me. I'm Like I'm watching Hank not even enjoy the fact that his team's gonna make the playoffs.
And over here it's like, that's. You should, you should love this. He's like, for what reason? He's like, where's parents?
And we took Hank out to like little Hank comes out with us with his undeveloped pallet and we all do a nice sushi dinner and Hank's like, ew, gross. I don't want this stuff. Chicken fingers, Mac and cheese bites, please. Hank, this is, this is gourmet shit that you're getting right now, okay?
You're just not gonna appreciate it. Like, what for? I don't wanna go to the playoffs. Oh, you're gonna make me go?
He's on his phone. Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's like we're asking our son to go to grandparents house. I don't wanna go. Can I play my video games?
You're such a shithead. Yeah, I mean that's not. None of that is false. I will say this.
I will say this. I did give up on the season half the Raiders game. I've been betting against under and was rooting against points in any action whatsoever. I didn't care how the game went.
But I will say this. There is a winning get in situation. If the Patriots beat the Bills, I'm all the way back in. If they lose to the Bills but then end up in the playoffs because the Dolphins also just suck, it's gonna be hard for me to really get.
That's what I'm hoping for. But if the Bills get back into the playoffs and you hate every second of watching it because that would just be like we'll be playing the Chiefs, Bills or maybe the Bengals. Maybe Bengals. They're banged up.
Do you remember what happened? Like how long ago we beat them? Yeah, we lost it. They fumbled in the red zone for a chance to win.
You lost to the bank. You lost that game. But we almost should have won. Almost should have won.
That's true. But again, I'm not gonna sit here and pretend like they're gonna make run the playoffs because Matt pushes the offense coordinator and they're trash. Okay, so again they won the game because they got defensive special themes. Touchdown.
That's the recipe. That's a hard recipe to repeat week after week. They don't get a defensive touchdown. They're not winning games.
And the one part of week 18 that's gonna be very difficult is the Bills will be playing for seating. They will be playing for like even if they lose tomorrow night, they still have an outside shot to one seed because they beat the Chiefs. And if the Bengals lost, the rating, like the Bills will be playing everyone because they want to get that one seed and even the two seed, you get two home playoff games guaranteed. If you get to that second round, I.
I will give back Joe's credit. Yeah, that last drive was like a big boy drive by him. Like he. I think it was 89 yards, 11 plays.
He looked like, hey, I'm actually moving forward and not with a pissy face and trying to take out people's knees. So maybe build off that couple good deep balls. Yeah, like he deserves credit when he plays well. He played well in that last drive to win the game.
I do feel bad for Dolphins fans. They're playing against whoever. Skyler Thompson. Yeah, I've been snake bit.
It's not their fault. Like, 2s started develop, I think concussion syndromes on Monday when they were watching film and he couldn't remember some of the plays. So that's why were they watching McGren again? They're watching Gruber and he was like, wait, did he shoot already in the graveyard?
No, he probably was watching McGruber's. Like, I feel like I've seen this movie before, but maybe not. That was really concussed last time. What it was is they were watching it, and then Mike McDaniel looked over and was like, you're not laughing as hard as you did last time I left.
I'd ever seen. I don't know, coach. That's funny, I guess, when his wife dies. But I do feel bad.
Dolphins fans, they've had very bad luck at quarterback spray. Bridgewater did cover on the road. He did. Which builds off that, which is nice.
Sorry, Hank. He covered your face. And then Jake, you still have the opportunity to come in and what do you say? Eliminate?
Well, just already eliminated, so we can't eliminate. They can double eliminate them. Yeah. You can't double because they can eliminate you.
Yeah, that's true. So you need to stay off the elimination. Yeah. Double eliminate.
Yeah. This couch is a disgrace to football. Well, it's good that it's good that no one on this couch said at any point during the season. I feel bad for you guys talking about our teams.
Thank God that didn't happen. That would be very embarrassing. Yeah, the same means more after what happened in early October at My Life. Yeah.
Fingers. The revenge finger game. He's doing it again. Wait, don't say it that way.
He's doing it. He's Doing it. The fingers. Yeah.
The pitchers defense is still very good. They score every single game. Feels like the game flipped on that pick six. They just, whenever they need a big, big play, it's like all our defense is going to drop the touchdown.
Right. That's, that's, that's the recipe for success. Right. So you win games like that, win them ugly.
Yeah. I hate you so much. You don't even like this. So next weekend, week 18, are you rooting for them to win that game?
Yes. Okay. Am I expecting to win that game? No.
But if they do win, I'm, I'll be, I'll be. But I will not wear it if it's back in the back end. Loss, lose by 20. And then the Dolphins are joke so they lose to a new candidate.
Yeah. So if you lose, if you lose next weekoffs and then in the first round, you're not even going to be rooting for the Patriots, it sounds like. Unless if we beat the Bills, it's back on. We got load up the clip.
Yeah. Yeah. You're ready to go get hot at the right time. Right now we'd be getting hot at the right time.
So it's, that's, that's, it's one or the other. Okay. Okay. That's.
I was gonna say it's fair. It's not fair. None of this is fair. We're sitting here and you're not.
Everyone else just got eliminated. There's literally elimination Sunday. So let's talk about the next game. Browns 24, Commanders 10.
Because the packers won and this commander's loss, the commanders have officially been eliminated from postseason participation. Carson Wentz. I feel bad. Pft.
Because that, that sucked. And I'll let you just take the floor because that sucked. Yeah. I got a couple ideas of why Carson went explained I touched on last week, but I.
In my opinion, anybody that watches football knows that Carson Wentz sucks at playing football. Anyone that watches football sees Taylor Heick play football thinks, hey, this guy sucks sometimes. And he's good, sometimes he's fun. So which quarterback would you rather have?
The quarterback that just is a big pile of stinking shit or the quarterback that sometimes has flowers growing around that shit? I would take Taylor height on that one. Taylor Heinecke is fun. His team loves him.
You can tell. Here's, here's what I knew that we're fucked. Well, probably after Carson went through the first intercept of the game, like the first 15 seconds. But after that I knew we were because Chase Young, who's been the Best cheerleader that we've had on the sidelines this year gets fucking hyped for Taylor Heineken.
He goes up behind Taylor Heineke, he points at his jersey, he like slaps him in the face, like, treats him like a dog that he loves. You know, his favorite dog. He sees Carson Wentz, he walks out on the field and. And it's telling Carson Wentz like, hey, please, we need you.
Believe in yourself. I want you to know that. I need you to trust yourself. He's begging him to believe in himself.
At that point, I was like, okay, this game's over. And Ron river apparently didn't know that if the packers beat the Vikings later on the day that that would eliminate from the playoffs. And that's why he chose to start Carson Wentz. I.
If that's true, it's one of two things. Either, either Rod is trying to get fired by saying he didn't know that, or he should be fired if he didn't know that. Those are really the only two options. And I think that he started Carson because my guess is Dan Snyder doesn't want to pay Taylor Heinecke winning bonuses and he's paying his favorite toy that they hand selected this offseason, 20 some million dollars per game and doesn't want to see him on the sidelines.
I honestly. So you're probably right. But I also think Riverboat Ron, the riverboat gambler. Because I had this happen to me this morning and it's something everyone has to go through and people have gotten out of their system, not gotten out of their system.
I still woke up this morning, I was like, Carson, there's still that dude in him. And I took the overinsky because I was like, he's ball out. I said he was going to ball out. I think Ron Rivera just has that.
Where he looked at it, he's like, no, Taylor Heineke, he haven't won in three games straight we went. Ty Lost, lost. Carson Wentz did get those two MVP votes. He probably had that same thought as Edwards, like, what if.
What if he just fucking goes nuclear and we get old Carson Wentz and now we're a serious, like, threat in the planet. I've seen enough Carson Wentz. I've seen Carson Wentz for a lifetime. That was the last one.
This was the last one for me. I actually thought he was. I didn't bet the commanders. That would have been stupid.
But I bet the overtaking. He ball out. I'm out. Fully out.
100% out of Carson Wentz I said during the game that they should just throw him into the ocean next to Saint Bin lan's family. That was a little. I think I went a little too far. No, barely.
Not far. Barely. Not far enough. Jake shook his head.
No, you don't think they should do that, Jake. No, Jake doesn't think. Went too far. Okay.
No, no, no, no. Let's not do that. Throw him into the Potomac River. Yeah.
And then rescue him after like 30 seconds. He gets really cool. What happens to Carson Wentz down. Because he's, by all accounts.
Let's just put it mildly. He doesn't seem like the best teammate, doesn't feel like a guy that people like to be around, and this is all conjecture. Maybe he's the coolest guy in the world, but he's rad. The one thing that happens with quarterbacks is, like, if you are a guy who everyone likes and can help with other, you know, the younger guys, you can have a long, long career as a backup.
Is Carson Wentz not gonna be in the league? I don't think a couple years. I think he even likes playing football. If you watch him during the games, he's just like.
He's got. We are body language experts. He looks like he would be. Rather be anywhere else in the world.
He's like. Anyway, he probably wishes he was at a Mike Trout game watching Mike Trout play baseball while Mike Trout wishes he was at a game watching Carson Wentz. Yeah, you're right. He probably would rather be hunting.
Yeah, he's probably good. Go hunt. Have fun. Actually, I don't think that the world is ready from a sheer population standpoint for Carson Wentz to be duck hunting full time.
I don't think we have enough ducks. He's gonna. If he is not in league in a year or two, it will be such a fascinating. I guess it's not what if, because we know what happened, but it's more of a holy shit.
Could you imagine telling yourself this guy, I mean, Max, if he's not in the league next year, do you imagine telling 2017 Max that Carson wants to be out of the league? Not by injury. I was the biggest Carson Wentz guy on, like, in the history of the planet. But.
And I was even saying that, hey, do. I was like, 2017 could come back. Exactly. That's why.
Yeah. I have to lie to myself. I said, he got two VPNs in 2017. He could turn back.
And that guy. Nope. Now go off. Go spend all your time on, like, a prairie in North Dakota.