Hello everybody and welcome to a brand new episode of Weird Adventures in Space, episode 19. Mars vs. Jupiter, the dream match begins. My name is June and I'll be your GM today, that's your for game.
Y'know? I don't know how to rest, and I've been doing this for like 35 episodes. I'll figure it out one day. We have some fighting to get to, and possibly some storytelling, but before I do I have to warn you that this is a game after all.
We'll be rolling dais to figure out how the story goes, and every once in a while you might hear us talking numbers. Don't get too scared, don't run away, although it's episode 19, you've had a lot of time to do that. I'd like to introduce my cast, first up we have Gisel. Hi, I'm your Gisel.
I'm a software engineer and I hate numbers. Hi, I'm Logan. I'm playing Yamahakita, now I'm ready to punch a shot at some robots. I'm Rob, and I'm playing Shalom.
Hi, I'm Zech. I'm hopefully playing Arlie for the foreseeable future, hopefully I don't get arrested at the end of this. What are you doing? I'm just Saturday morning Zech.
We're in the Yeti onesie. And they're going to cart him off the jail for it. Hi, I'm Brian, I'm Fleet Carey. I don't currently have an occupation, but I also hate numbers.
Or numbers could just be bad. Hi, I'm Mark and I'm playing Zai. Sorry for missing last league, but like always with these things, children come before games for me. We wouldn't have it any other way.
Last episode, the team was invited to an intergalactic fighting tournament known as the Planet X Deadly Arts Invitational. Akeda was recruited along with Martian Gladiatrix, Wuxia, and they added Union member Lotus to round out their trio. After taking the group to Planet X to start the fighting tournament, it became clear that things were going awry and that the business backstage was not as clean as it appeared to be at first glance. In fact, John has snuck backstage and found that the leader of the cosmic ball, Gita's dad President Goryo, seems to be scheming in the locker room.
That's a bad thing. And I should also mention that Arlu got brought up on disciplinary measures for doing a little brain touchy on El Dito and is now stuck in a prison, locked in against her will, turns out her magic cat is a magic rat and betrayed her and locked her in the prison after stealing her identity. This is Weird Adventures in Space, episode 19, Mars vs. Jupiter, the Dream Match begins.
Harvisa begins in Planet X, dead set in the heart of the Colosseum. We are squared up for the match that I'm sure you have all been waiting for. It is the rough and tumble rockabilly scumbags of Jupiter's rings versus our intrepid Union of Heroes representing Planet Mars. You have a brief second to talk amongst yourselves before the formal procession starts, Akita and Lotus, you're there with your partner Hrexia, and you are being called to the podium to fight.
You have anything to say before with things commence. You have been squared off against the Jovian team. None of you have ever been to Jupiter, but it has a bit of a reputation in the solar system as being... Stupider!
They have a reputation for being some rough and tumble thugs. Looking across the stadium you can see the other team. Two robots and one rather large Jotan on green orc-like species. The two robots are both dressed as if they're some sort of partners, partners in crime or partners in whatever the hell robots might be doing together.
Kilex is in the middle of the Colosseum. He is announcing people up to the stage. He calls each person up by their name individually, so first we get the Jovian team of Skidmark, Big Flex, and Bring Dead. I forgot he was Skidmark.
He's got a lot of people, so much bad drones. Oh, gosh. They then announce Prexia the Wrathbringer, who gets a huge pop from the crowd. Seems like she's a fan favorite.
She does the... She makes the fist with two hounds and then pumps it towards the crowd. I'm doing it on video, so it's a good round of audio. I know it works that way.
Yeah. I know it. Next up is Lotus, your call up to the podium as well. The crowd has no idea who you are, and so it doesn't really get...
That's fair. Just to set first that guy out, it's about right. And finally, Yamah Akita is announced as the last member of the team. Do you do anything while you walk up?
Nah, he's just gonna walk up. You cool for school? Yeah. Chill.
True dad energy. Kilex then explains the rules of the fight. Instead of being three on three, it will instead be a series of one on one fights. The pairs win the group are chosen randomly, meaning that members of the team will be paired up in advance of the fight starting.
They also explain that the fight only comes to end when one participant concedes, gives up, or is knocked out after explaining these rules too, and explaining that things like killing people and trying to cripple them or whatever against the rules. That means I can't disassemble the transform. He begins to read off the pairing. He's got like a ceremonial envelope, you know, with a little axial on it.
You want to get fancy? And he announces that the first match of Mars versus Jupiter will be Lotus paired up against brain dead. Oh, phone. The rest of the team are instructed to take a bench which are on the outside of the room.
Lotus, can I make a fizzy crawl? Oh, okay. That's not too bad. Plus three.
I'm going to say that you're starting to get a little nauseous. I don't like that. A little bit. Like it's not just butterfly in the tumbly.
There's like, there's stuff going on. Does it feel like it's like a sonic thing? Like one of those low frequency noises? Fake Amanda Cindermup.
Yeah. No, actually, if you want to make another fizzy crawl, I'll let you check yourself. Not as good. That's not plus two.
You don't know what's going on with your stomach, but you've also started sweating? Like that. Mm. You enter up to the match, cross from you on the ring, is a robot.
He looks like he seemed better days. He is not full flush, apple or android or whatever. He is definitely thrown together with a patchwork of parts. Different colored arms made out of different materials, different colored legs made out of different materials.
This guy looks like a junk box. I just waved my crystal. I'm like, hi. I get it.
I get it. I get it. The one thing you notice is that he's got sort of like a dome on the top of his headpiece that is completely transparent and seepred. Seems to have some type of like robot brain processor in it and it is cracked to shit.
Oh. I need you to make a nose roll. That's plus three. All right.
That means you get a chance to go first. Oh, can I roll to see how many weird magics I have real quick? Sure. Okay.
I got a lesson. So the first thing I want to do is I want to use one of my weird magics to turn my boots into roller states with like little crystal wheels. Sure. Specifically like old school ones that you would see like in the 80s.
So like the big wheels, the big chunky boot. Do you have any good crafting? I think I have crafting. I want to do have craft score.
All right. Plus three. Yep. I'm going to do a little bit of my crystal and then just kind of like charge forward and try to hit him.
Are you charging for it and swinging on the same turn or no? It's kind of like trying to build up speed first. So like a little bit of that. So I'll say you're prepping.
Can you make me a fiss equal? Two. What I'm going to say is you'll get a plus one to your next fight roll. As long as you use something that would make sense based on your charging.
For his turn, brain dead opens up a little pouch in the front of his chest compartment and pulls out a giant bottle of liquor and starts spilling it all over the crack in his brain. Oh, honey. No. I'm not asking to ask is this bender?
I think once I've got like a little bit of speed going and because this is supposed to be like a tournament where you kind of show shit off like she's doing that thing where you like crisscross your legs going backwards and then I'm just going to hold cock in with my crystal arm. Okay. Go ahead and make me a fight roll. That is plus six.
He definitely ducks underneath your hip then grabs your wrist on the way back and starts spinning in circles. Well, I'm on wheels. So she'd be fun. Yeah.
For his turn, he drunkenly lunges forward towards the ground hitting the ground with his face, but he didn't let go of your hand the entire time. So he's taking you with him. Okay. Can you make me a physique roll to escape having your arm broken?
Four. All right. So he's got you pinned. He actually rolled a six and I'll take two damage to your arm.
As he's pulling there on the ground, he's got your one arm pinned with his right arm and with his left arm, he's still pouring more booze over his head. Okay. Back to you. And they did say the beginning of the fight that as long as it's a non-lethal, everything is gucci like power.
Well, since he's touching me, I'm going to spend a fake point. Actually, it's been two. And to activate my set, your strength is my strength and the second one to reverse it. So basically any damage I take you takes.
Okay. It's like a touch thing. Can I have you make two will rolls? Seven for the first one and eight for the next one.
Everything goes off as planned. Now he has no idea what you're doing. Yeah. Obviously you're doing some stuff with your hands.
But he's laying down there on the ground and doesn't really react to you doing that. Fair. Instead, what he does is he rolls his entire body as if it were like a sleeping bag without leaving the ground without getting to his feet, rolling a good 10 feet to your left and then laying on his back flat prone waiting for you to come. Okay.
So I'm going to get up and just kind of like look at him. Yo, I've never fought anybody that does the whole like drunken martial arts thing. This is really interesting. And then I'm just going to hold my hand out and shoot a light beam.
Sure. Go ahead and make me a what is that? Shoot roll. Technically will is what I use to do those powers.
Well, let's go. So that is a seven. Okay. You roll the critical success.
God damn it. It's bullshit. In reaction to you shooting your laser, he slides on his back like he was on a slip and slide until he's right underneath your ankles and I need you to make four fight rolls. God damn it.
All right. First one is five. Second one is three. Okay.
So the third one is four and the last one is also four. You take two, three, one, one. Go ahead and mark that for your turn. How much was that total to you?
That was two, three, one, one. So six. Yep. So I need you to make a world roll yourself seven.
Okay. So you major will roll, which means you're not even stunned by that amount of kinetic energy going through your body and being channeled to him. So you don't take the numbers and you don't really affected by custom damage. Okay.
Okay. So for his turn, that means that he's going to take those little ticks on his body, but what he does in the process, he slides under your laser, kicks you in the ankle, comes up with an uppercut, too quick to have to be a heart and then falls on his back again. I'm going to say for each strike he makes at you, he hits some sort of invisible aura right above your skin, close to your skin, that causes him to recoil and be pushed back. Okay.
Because he's an android, he doesn't actually feel any pain, but he looks down after doing all these hits at his own body and notices dense on his feet and his hands and that's back. And just kind of like, you know, I'm a very like cocky friend and just be like, yeah, let's call Robert glue back to you. It sucks. I want to try to power slide into him to try to get him up on his feet again.
What you mean? You know how like if you were to slide into a base in baseball and you get that shoveling momentum. Okay, so the idea is I want to slide so that I can get up under him and get him up in the air. Make me a fight roll and then a physique roll fight roll is five.
The vehicle is three. He took one damage off of the slide in, but when you try to flip him up, he does a back bridge. That one. Then it's history.
He is going to do his best to get himself back up to his feet. You can tell he's stumbling, although you don't know if that's part of the drunken style or just going to have his ass with and he reaches in his chest and pulls out another bottle and starts drinking it via his robot brain. The old glass bottle he takes and whips it at you at high speed. I want to catch the bottle with the light and whip it back at him in a way that breaks his current bottle.
So you have to catch it and then throw it back. Yeah. Okay, just roll for me to catch and make a perfect return. So we can catch it and then shoot to throw back.
Actually beat you on the camera. All right. You're going to take two damage from the glass shards and then it is yours. So I didn't catch it.
So the glass hit me. That's fun. I'm just I'm not used to like fighting fighting. It's fun.
Yeah. Okay. I'm going to take a step back to like get all the glass off and then I'm going to get as close as I can and try like cold cocking just a hand maker just to see if I can hit him. You want me to fight seven?
That's a big. That's a big. I can do one now. He ended up rolling a six.
So he was stumbling to get to his feet and you clocked him one in the dome. It made him stumble back a few inches. He took one in for his turn. He's going to do a big forward leap but land about three feet in front of you doing a head stand with his back to you and then he'll pass the turn.
Hmm. Yeah. I got really scared. I'm going to stomp on his fingers.
Go ahead and give me a five. Five. Critical success. So he ended up rolling a ten.
He's going to use his critical success to handspring off the ground and attach his legs around your neck. A la a hera con rana and attempt to choke you out with his thighs. So could you make me three physicals? Yeah.
First one is a three. A one. And another three. He has these robot thighs around your neck and you can tell that they are pressing on you with pneumatic force.
You know, if you stay in this hole, that's not going to go so well. So you feel yourself being immobilized. Like you're trying to get him off of you. He's too heavy.
He's like pulling you towards the ground with his weight. Then you start to feel a little pain. Choke tightness around the throat. It'll take you two points to your neck.
Okay. And then that dude rolled a critical failure. So while you're fading out, you're starting to get the black around your eyes. He slips off your back and falls on his head and you get a free turn.
He said he falls on his head, right? Yes. I want to curve stomp him like right in the dome, like trying to crack the dome more. Okay.
Go ahead and make a flare. That is a six. So he is on the ground. His skull has been split open, but you can see him tap the ground after taking the hit to the head.
He gives up. I just reached down to help him get up and then I'm going to lean in real real close to be like you're gonna have to try a lot of fucking harder. Can you make me a fizzy girl? Oh, no.
It just a lift of big ass. Two. Okay. Beautiful.
So you managed to do like the thing where you reach out and you pull them up and then you throw up. Yeah. That was coming. I almost did it just intentionally just like, hold on.
All right. I'm good. So when Akita saw the guy tap out, he got up and started cheering and then he sees Carrie throw up and was like, come on. All my duty.
Akita, Carrie is looking rather green in the face as if she has some sort of illness. Is it all right for Akita to go out onto the field like once the fight's over? Yeah, now that the match is over. Yeah.
He's gonna run up to Carrie. Hey, I threw up and I won. That's all I wanted. Yeah, I saw you doing all right.
No, there is something fucking about this place and it made me nauseous as hell. All right. Let's see if we can get you to a doctor or something. Yeah.
Like I'm not proud of this victory, but I fucking won and that's all that matters because I got my ass handed to me quite like if it hadn't been for the rubber glue. I'd have been out. Yeah. I'm a big fan of you winning and then immediately getting the food.
I think that's very funny. I'm actually kind of noticing it. I wasn't sure if it was sabotage. I'm good with flu.
I can be sick. Well, you don't know what it is. Yeah, but it's flu like symptoms. I'll just say that.
You're kind of like led over to the doctor. There's a doctor for each team to make sure all the participants are okay. Is ours due to that? No, no, it's a no sand.
Someone from Planet X. It's just a giant nine foot tall dragon ball guy with huge armor like in a tiny doctor's coat. Oh, that's so cute. So the scoreboard represents one oh Mars Jupiter your partner who looks he has called up next.
She'll be fighting the robot known as skidmark. And after a brief around 90 second match, Roxia is awarded the match by technical forfeit as skidmark is a transforming robot. He is capable of turning back and forth into a car like vehicle. You see her up via grab the car, flip it and rip the axles out.
While the crowd is screaming and joy. I'm like slicing into Kelly's tendin. I think I can be put back together. It's a little bit further.
I mean, do you not remember what happened when it came to Fox? There. I think that there was a lot of team. It's after the fight between Roxia and skidmark.
As a last member of the Jovian team, the Jupiterian wrestler Big Flex walks his big old jutegan ass up to the stage, speaks into the announcer's ear and the announcer pronounces that Mars is when the contest due to forfeit. And as Big Flex walks by, your team on the way back to the locker room, he gives you a little wink and a little flex and says, you know, most of this for the camera, anyway, boys, good fight. But I'm going to the hospital over these two robots. Your team wins best two of three without a key to even having to fight.
Okay, that's happy, but he's also a bit like kind of got nervous energy now because he wanted to fight. And he's like, now he's just worried about Kerry. Bruxy walks back to the team covered in oil, gives you a pat on the backs like, we'll get him next time, slugger. Kerry, the doctor after he's done looking over says, young lady, I think you've been poisoned.
Ha. That sounds about right. When did you start feeling this way? About as soon as I walked on to the arena.
Did I eat anything at that banquet thing? You did, everybody. But you're the only one that's set. Can I see the Earth's team from where I am?
They look like they're getting sick too. Nope. That's some horseshit. The doctor is yelling like we need someone that can work with earthlings.
Does anyone know me? Earthling doctors? Pretty clueless. I have a key leg thing so I can just kind of sit and like heal myself a little bit.
The doctor goes, that's all right. I'd still like to keep an eye on you. That's fine. Let me take your vitals and all that.
And the scene fades away as the doctor is looking over your body, your sickly body now as the rest of your team is celebrating. I'm fucking stoked. I punched a robot. We're going to transition the scene to the backstage area.
Now this is the locker room where the fighters are led to prep on planet X and Sean, you are a busy and a little bit of a reconnaissance mission. You had snuck into the backstage area. I believe it's a very tiny man. Yes.
Very small. And you end up eavesdropping on a conversation between the figureheads of the cosmic kabal. A mafia that your group has been dancing on the periphery with this entire past couple months. So by the time that you peek your eye in the room, you can see three members of this kabal, President Goryo, a dog like alien species wearing a generalise in Mozart.
A phlecica, an eight foot tall woman made out of shards of broken glass, and the plug. What looks to be a rather fancy computer tower with a set of wheels on the bottom of it. You can overhear them chatting. Essentially, there seems to be some sort of disagreement as to some plan they're working on.
It's hard to immediately figure it out. Basically, after Goryo instructs the other two to leave the issue alone, reflectica and the plug wheel themselves out of the room. I'm going to give you the opportunity to react when you see this. Just from what they were saying, can I tell if they were talking about the tournament or just no idea at all?
They were talking about a frame up. Not sure exactly what, but they were trying to frame something. Can I try and just tell the reflectica? Sure, sure.
I'm going to have you make a quick stealth roll. That is zero total. So I'm going to say that you wait a little while for reflectica and the plug to make their weight on the hall. He has a computer tower on wheels so he doesn't go very fast.
And while you're waiting, you can hear President Goryo from the room say, you can come in now. I've smelled you for a while. Yeah, I will walk in then and go back to normal size. He looks at you and goes, a son a day.
That's, he stands up and immediately closes the door, locks it. And he says, a son a day. Are you the son a day that's been seen with the union of heroes? That depends who's asking.
My name is President Goryo and the president of Venus, one of the five heads of the cosmic ball. How's it happen to be your friend, Akita's father? Well, I guess I call him Yama. So what's the cabal doing here?
Well, we did send a venousian team to represent us in the games. And yes, I thought it was the cabal doing here. The members of our cabal are the ones that we sent. It's not like there's much of a power structure on there.
It's just us and our goons. We've got a couple of different members of our, say, lower grade lieutenants fighting. Reflectica is a street fighter by nature. She wanted to get her hands dirty.
I honestly don't know what the cabal is doing here because I thought we were coming here to win kind of getting a different impression. So I was hoping to talk to somebody other than those two sneaks. But I don't think my son will be seen with me in public. I'm not sure your family will be seen with you in private.
It's all damage. It's all damage. He sits back down at his chair and smiles and says, it's sharp done. It's probably not wrong either.
And I know that. I got three kids and none of them are looking in the eye. A single one. May I have your name, please?
Fine. I'm Sean. He reaches out, gives you the handshake saying, my name is President Goryo. If you're Sean, then you're the same Sean that had it dusted up with a plug a couple months back?
Yeah, he was shifting drugs on the Mars. Against our orders. Against our explicit orders, not to fuck with the union. Which doesn't really affect you, obviously, when I was cleaning up.
Starting to think these people have around you can't be trusted. I mean, Killix is a good guy, but... You could follow but you won't care if you trust me. He looks at you and says, Sean, there's one thing I was hoping to discuss with the union before it cuts too late.
They're not exactly answering my calls. We don't know what we need to do to prepare for Raghor. We have an alliance. We promise to fight by each other side.
From the book I got from future Sean that I've been studying all this time. All this time. What do I know about the plans? How much more prepared are we compared to them?
Go ahead and give me a lower rule. What's the plus three? Plus three? I thought I had a good rule, but that basically means it.
You learned that due to extenuating circumstances, only President Goryo is seen by the union side during that. None of these other members that you've heard of reflectica, the plug, even Prince Killix, are represented in that book. It said that President Goryo led a fleet of star fighters against some of the nastier Raghor space troops. So yeah, back to President Goryo.
Right now, we don't have the firepower to beat them. But from what I can tell, you're the only one from the car that's really going to be fighting. Not even Killix? But he and Jan had a good relationship.
You can't trust anyone. So apparently your team. Yeah, they're good people. What kind of fire power do you need?
Everything you have, honestly, this is Raghor. This is one of the strongest armadas in the universe. It takes a big deep side, it looks towards the ground. I just keep getting the feeling that I don't have long left in this world.
Whatever we need to do, I'll do. I'll resign to that. I'll see everything I've built, be left in dust. Your people don't know this, but before I got to Venus, there was no government, no schools, nothing.
Now they do. It's not good, it's violent, it's awful, but it's something. And now I'm seeing all these people around me who are willing to pull it down in an instant. And at that moment, you hear a blood curling scream come from another one of the backstage locker room.
Oh no. Goryo immediately stands up from his chair and goes, I really fucking hope it's not those two. Yeah, as soon as he says that I'm going to start running to the water screen. He'll follow you.
You get down to the locker room of the seresions from the planet series. These are the ones who are all wearing giant priest robes and ceremonial wooden masks when they were in the party. The floor of the locker room lays one of the seresions, bleeding through his white robe. The chest is filled with scratches as if they're made by talons.
The blood soaks through the holes. The odd part is that underneath you can see what appears to be human skin, rendered open flesh. This is a fighter that was known as the Faceless God. He's clearly quite dead.
The other thing to notice is that there is a little union of heroes pin left right next to the body. So on Mars, Zai, like a dancin changed past since you joined the union. They all took off some karate kerna. And you get a heads up in your communicator in this beautiful morning that do dad may have a lead on the items you asked her to find.
Alright, then I'll go and see you about these items. I'll take the buggy there. Also, because you asked me and I thought about it, Zai physically is one that he looks like now costume wise. Oh, okay.
Zai remembers in the lab there was one show they could watch was the Ursling show called Jolly Months. And his favorite character was the Johns. So he is wearing a white leather jacket, a black t-shirt and jeans and he's going to go by the Zai. I love it.
I love it. I love this. This is beautifully deranged. Hey, I have one day to think of something.
That's what I thought. Reverse greaser. Yep. He only knows what he knows and he knows the funds or the Johns as I said.
So he wants to be the Zai. So this is how you get to Dr. Judaz Lab, she's in the same old base here. She waves in.
She takes a look and goes, Hey, nice jacket. Do you think here? Yeah, you guys said you could create me something. So I had the great me this and I think I'm looking good.
Hey. She looks at you and goes like, Okay, respect. Respect. You know what you're about.
So there's things you're asking me to look for. I sent out a bunch of drones on Earth to check all the volcano. I got like two leads and she shows you one in the middle of the United States. It's just generous thing.
There's one in the middle of the US and the Southern region and there's one on a far off island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. And she says to you, I had some scanners check it out. I even sent a lava proof one down in. It seems like there are these large machines in each one of these volcanoes.
I'm assuming them one of them was when you're looking for, right? Yes, the one he's looking for specifically shaped like a bird. And so if anything like that, then yes, we would appreciate that. She gestures you over to like two big screens and on the left screen, there's like an x-ray scan clearly of a volcano and something inside it.
And on the right is the same thing. One of them kind of looks like a bird as if wings were tightened up and were in a ball. The other one appears to look like some sort of eight and she's like just like blobs to me to either of these ring a bell. Yeah, I believe that's what we're looking for.
It can't really be taken up unless he can get into it. Like it won't fly unless he can get there. So we might need to like find a way to get you inside the volcano. Yes, you know, most humans are poor.
Or can we excavate it and if we can somehow excavate it and get it here, then we can get into it. She sits there and puts her finger on her chin. Like I think we could definitely excavate it. That's better than building you a lot of suits.
That's a lot of swimming. And at that moment, you see Arlu bust through one of the teleporters. It's a single Arlu, you know, in love, purple skin, four foot two or whatever. I don't know if I keep our stuff.
I'm gonna keep my tent. I'm gonna put my tent on that short. That's how you know it's bullshit. Harlu, it's nice to see you.
I haven't seen anyone in dates. Oh, yeah, well, I was just on the prison doing some stuff, hang out. What are you guys up to? I don't think I'm gonna be here.
Where the middle of getting me a giant eagle that can turn into a robot? That's so cool. Dude, that immediately turns around and is like, are you feeling okay? If you're feeling sick, I could always regurgitate on you.
That would be a negative too. No, fuck. What happens is, Jesus Christ. What happens is that Arlu, in that moment where you say like I could regurgitate on you?
She's holding her demeanor as best she can, but she kind of wretches. And when she wretches, her entire body becomes flushed with the color green and then immediately fades back into the normal purple. Sucks. Dude, that says, Arlu, why are you here?
Your discipline is another two days. You didn't call her. Did you need her? No, it's lonely being the only one here.
I didn't call her. No. As soon as you say that, the Arlu just kind of stands there awkwardly, not sure what to do. That's accurate.
And then after looking around the room, a giant knife falls out of their jacket. And still also accurate. And Arlu goes, oh shit. And then jumps back into the teleporter.
Arlu seems distressed. Yeah, Arlu seems like not Arlu. I don't like that. Do you mind going in and seeing what's up with her?
She's supposed to be on another planet. Do we know where the teleporter is going? Can I ask before jumping in? Of course, it takes straight to my lab in Mercury on the Mercury in prison.
I mean, you're safe, obviously, you're not a prisoner, but she was there to do some disciplinary stuff that as far as I could tell, they didn't involve knives, they're going home early. Okay. She would have had those confiscated. So as I have agreed to with Wayfair and the name of capitalism, I shall go to Mercury and help out Arlu.
Like her watch. She looks at you and she's like, I'm confused, but Godspeed, man. I will gingerly walk through the portal. You walk through the portal as soon as you get through the other side of it.
It's pretty much instantaneous. You see Arlu scrambling out of the lab into the hallway, like running at top speed, but almost clumsily, like, you know, they're drawing shit. Arlu, it's me, Zai. Are you okay?
Arlu immediately starts ignoring you. I will start like, not, you know, like chasing, but, you know, jogging after someone. You're like thinking like, oh, they didn't hear you or didn't see you and be like, Arlu trying to get their attention. You can keep going and they don't notice.
But once you get to a part of the building where there's like multiple hallways intersecting with each other, you come face to face with a rather large woman who's supposed to be dressed in formal union gear. She's got alabaster skin. She looks down to you and says, that dude had sent me someone new? Who are you?
My name is Zai or the Zai, if you'd like to go by my hero name. I am looking for my friend Arlu, who just ran through the portal here. And yes, I was sent by doodad. She looks at you and says, hi, I'm white star on the warden of the prison here.
So Arlu ran through the portal. That doesn't make any sense. Arlu was in her cell. Yeah, she was running through the portal.
She was doing that thing where she turns green and drops knives. You see white star immediately like thinking with her face? You know, kind of like, huh? You're with her face.
And then she kind of goes, I guess there's all things Arlu could do? But if Arlu's running, then that's probably not a good sign. You might leading me to where you saw her. She's running to where I saw her running to and I'll take her that way.
Sounds good. While you're going, white star asks you. So the Zai, are you also a member of the union? Yes, I am a member of the union for capitalism.
Please. I think maybe someone gave you the wrong training manual, but we'll get there. I was put into a room with tons of things and I was just told about capitalism. So I believe that is what we are about.
White star looks at you and is like, honestly close enough. We'll figure it out with time. Although I will grieve you that. The man inside my head is selling me.
I am raw. No, I'm so dumb. She starts nodding and is like, that's starting to make more sense. You got two guys in there?
Yes, yes I do. Well, when we first time will be the last. Let's head on over to her cell. She walks it on the hallway.
She goes in the direction she was running. So let's just see what's up. She tries to open the cell and the door is locked. Arlu, this obviously gets your attention.
Somebody grabbing the door. You've been locked in this room for getting hours or so. I'll tell your magic turned off. All your powers.
Hours. I want to try and climb above the door. She's gone, feral. White star looks through the little view of Porton.
Arlu, are you in there? Why did you lock yourself in? I am supremely untrusting and I'm not going to talk. White star looks at you.
The zy end goes, let's just see if she's in there. She puts her hand on the hand print mechanism. It unlocks the electric block and white star walks into the cell. It starts looking at you.
And I dropped down. I dropped down where? I'm a white star. I'm a white star.
I'm supposed to get there. It just takes a couple more days. And as I see you playing, I'm just making a fight roll. That is a three.
She easily catches you and Judos you to the ground. That says someone's really eager to fight today. The train is not for a couple hours. What can I get though?
Arlu, how did you get into this hell so quickly? I've been in here for about the Julian hours with no games. or anything. Sleeping for 8 hours, you told me you were going to bed.
Now I've been waiting Come in here and let me out What is there? Malick. That's a really dumb name. I have not a fan of it.
Malick? He's got a dumb face. He does shifty stuff with his face. White star looks at you and goes, and you do shifty stuff with your face too, right?
I don't know. I mean, I can look shifty at times. I've been told that I'm shifty. Because Zai thinks that white star is talking to him.
Sure. When he says the shifty thing, he shifts from one eye to the other. That little pair is like a. That was cool.
I want to try and shift my eyeball like him. You fuck up at it. That's up in your mouth. Oh no.
And then it goes back. White star looks at you and goes, Zai, do you want to tell him, Arlie, what you told me? Like, apparently you were chasing each other? You came to Mars while I was talking to Dr.
Dudan. And you did that thing where you turned green and dropped knives and then you ran through the portal. I got that malick guy's green usually. When he's not shedding to be somebody cooler than he is.
I have no idea who this malick person is. What star goes me neither? Malick is a butthole. You might notice that my cat is gone.
I didn't know you had a cat. OK. I did. I don't know where she is.
And I'm going to possibly do something about it. I can call Dudan to corroborate my story. Miss Star if you'd like. No, I have a reason to believe you, Zai.
And I think I have a reason to believe Arlie, but I'm still trying to wrap my head around what exactly is going on. And at that moment, another Arlie appears standing behind Zai in lights. Do you immediately shoot just no no chill? No chill.
OK, go ahead and roll me a shoot. Oh. Zero. Here, hold the negative three.
Shit. Fuck yeah. Arlie hits other Arlie directly between the eyes, blowing her back into the cement wall behind her. And White star is like, this shit is getting too far.
Zai, can you restrain the one in the hallway or restrain the one in the cage? OK. This is a cell, not a cage. White star looks at you and goes, it can be a cage.
Are you going to come with me? I'm aware that it can be a cage. I've been stuck in here for several several hours. She looks at you and says, are you going to come with me or not?
Not with that one over there. Because they took my cat. That one could be you. We don't know the difference.
Only you do. I'll shoot the fake one. You know what? That's came to shoot me because I bet he can't.
Because he sucks at magic. White star looks at Zai in the hall and is like, you got Arlie handled? Yes. I'm going to throw up in that Arlie's hole and son.
Had that's the second one up. Because I don't know if this is my Arlie or not. OK. So I hear it for two points.
Hey, that puts the face back in the shape. White star says, I think we have a way we can do this without anyone throwing shots. Everyone just agrees to answer a handful of questions. I think we'll be able to figure out who the real one is real quick.
Me. And then one of the hall goes, also me. I bet they don't even know what my union here on Amos. She's like, I will ask the question.
I don't know it either, though. OK, so white star invites you out of the cell into the hallway where the other are Lewis. Can I trick them? White star?
What? No, the other are Lewis. You're being very far away from each other. OK, that's smart.
And white star says, as someone who's read your file, Arlie, and Zai is a member of Arlie's team, I think we should be able to ask you a series of questions and figure out who's who, obviously, both if you aren't Arlie. Unless you got some stuff going on that I'm unaware of. She looks over at Zai and goes, what's something a member of your team would know that no one else would? Who took out the big star guy?
Did we take him out? I don't know our team. No, no, this is actually Zai talking about. OK.
Just leave it there. Come on. You don't have to be coherent. Yeah, Zai's just he's kind of mumbling it out like he doesn't really know what to ask again.