WELL AWARE 37: The Big Update

What this episode covers

This episode is by request. It’s the episode I’ve been wanting to post but haven’t yet, for reasons I name below. This is also the episode where I deliver a 40 minute soliloquy, so if you prefer the interview format, feel free to skip today and hang tight till the next one, my conversation with Jason Logan of Toronto Ink company. No hard feelings. Truth: I didn’t update Well Aware for the better part of two years. Why? In this episode, I explain everything. The yoga teacher training, the book deal, the demanding job, and the diagnoses that kept me from podcasting. In considering what to share and when, a monologue about my own health journey felt iffy. Is it TMI, does it sound like a sob story, or is it simply unprofessional? I hesitated and mulled for quite some time. Because of my transparent approach to Well Aware, it’s become a living, breathing audio record of my journey. This little ditty is (for now) too big a part of me to ignore, and it’s important context for the show. In sharing, I hope to participate in dismantling shame around chronic illness, to help redefine the relationship between work and vulnerability, and to fill you in on all the things going on behind the Instagram frame, behind the podcast, behind the book, and behind the byline. Self-healing, self-study, and self-practice are often glamorized on social media, but the darkest days were the ones where I really saw myself. Self-discovery can be lighthearted and easy, and also lonely and challenging. It’s been a wild almost-two-years, and while I’m still struggling with the unknown, being back feels pretty damn good. Image by Louis Camnitzer, 1937