What Depression Really Feels Like

Vulnerable is beautiful. In this conversation about mental health, depression, and healing, Cesar shares his life-long struggle with clinical depression. He describes how it manifested in childhood, relationships, substance use, and moments of crisis. Together on Beauty in the Break, Foster and Cesar break down what depression actually feels like inside the mind and body, why so many people don’t recognize their symptoms, and how tools like SSRIs, meditation, and Buddhist philosophy helped him move toward clarity and peace.Foster brings essential insight into postpartum depression (PPD), perinatal mood disorders, and the alarming mental health statistics among birthing people, especially Black and Brown parents who face systemic inequities. Together, they unpack why depression often hides behind confidence and how to speak about suicidal thoughts with compassion. This powerful episode will help you better understand depression whether it lives in you or someone you care about. In this episode they explore: What depression actually feels like from the insideThe truth about alcoholism and depression’s chemical gripHow SSRIs transformed Cesar’s relationship with his own mindThe surprising connection between Buddhism, meditation, and healingThe moment Cesar nearly ended his life, and the tattoo that saved himPostpartum depression statistics everyone should knowHow to best support someone in a depressive episodeIf you or someone you know needs support: Call or text 988 for the 24/7 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline in the USSuicide Awareness Voices of EducationPostpartum Support International (PSI)Also mentioned: Maternal Health Advocate Angelina Spicer and her non-profit Spicey MomsIf this episode spoke to you, you will love The Eating Habits We Didn’t Choose where we explore disordered eating and food insecurity. You can also watch the episodes on YouTube.If you enjoyed this episode, take a moment to follow Beauty in the Break on your favorite podcast app and leave a review—it really helps!Reach out to the show—send an email or voice note to [email protected] and be sure to follow on Instagram. Cesar Cardona:Receive his monthly newsletter Insights That MatterGet guided meditation from Cesar on his website Listen to music from Cesar + The Clew on Apple Music and SpotifyFoster Wilson:Buy her poetry book Afternoon AbundanceLearn about her postpartum servicesReceive her monthly newsletter Foster’s VillageCreated & Hosted by: Cesar Cardona and Foster WilsonExecutive Producer: Glenn MilleySend us Fan Mail