Hello everybody on Secret Patreon. Shh. Three, two... I'm just totally there.
You're ready, baby. I'm ready to do the time. Welcome to the Ditch and Know that you're moments of... She's now!
She's really mad. Did you know Jimmy Henrichs didn't even have a guitar? And he was hanging out with these other dudes that were like real cool in a band. They still alive, some of them, and they're still in a band.
Jazz and Prof guards didn't mean like, get down. They were like some cool cats. They were the super cool cats and they thought that Junior was such a cool cat that they let him like, squat around them. He was a squatter.
I heard he caught a mean squat. I heard he could squat like an entire band. Can I see? Yeah.
That was the Jimmy Henrichs experience. That is what it was, people didn't know that. That's where they got the name from. It wasn't from music, it was because he used to squat people.
Yeah, he actually ripped it off of Joe Rogan. Yeah, Joe Rogan. That's why Joe Rogan calls it the experience, because he too squats everybody. It's a good way to go.
Yeah. Jazz cats, you say? Yeah, these real cool cats that were like jazz, I forgot the name of the band, but they were real cool, Michael. Like down cats, you know, these cats is cool.
I'm not, I can't think of a jazz band. They're usually- Maybe they're a little funky solo Desperados, like Miles Davis or John Coltrane. This guy was on like a morning TV show or TV show being interviewed by a nerdy white guy and he looked like, like, he still, he had a bandana. Like he is still, whatever he does is still totally acceptable to look like Jimmy Henrichs, but I think he's like, nah man, Jimmy Henrichs looks like me.
So this guy gave Jimmy Henrichs guitar guitar? He's like, yeah, you can play it and then squat me. And he's still, tell you what, you lift me in these other three cats, I'll give you this trackcaster. Yeah.
That's what happened. What are you talking about? Because the only thing I know about Jimmy Henrichs is that- Finally, after all these years, you say the thing that you're supposed to say this whole time. I've always wondered, when is he gonna say what are you talking about?
Yeah, they got- Because Jimmy was in the Air Force. Was he? I mean, of course, yes. He's squat air like he used to.
He used to. Squat an airport. Lift, lift entire fleets. Yeah.
Right. No, I'm pretty sure that he was, he was, what is Jimmy Henrichs? Because he's an American guy. He's English.
I don't think he is. I think he's an American guy who was in the Air Force. Did he go there? And then he started squatting jazz cats in his age.
At the age of eight hours. At which point, he moved to England, which I think he's English. He's because they were the first people. Exactly.
They were the first people who really appreciated him. Did he speak with an English accent? I thought he did. I don't know if I've ever heard Jimmy Henrich speak.
Oh, man. I'm Jimmy Henrichs mate. He's pretty light, you know. He's pretty light.
He's getting scared of me. He's my kiss, this guy. Yeah. I like squatting people, you know?
I like squatting and I play my guitar backwards, you know? He did play backwards. I'm Jimmy Henrichs. That's right.
My strings are upside down. So why did he sing talk like an American guy? Oh, we all do that. We all do that.
That's what all of us do. All English Australians sing American women sing. We're releasing. We're releasing.
All thanks. Yeah. Purple. Instead of purple.
Right. Purple. Yeah, actually it's purple. Yeah.
Cheese and fries. The wind cries. The wind cries. The wind cries.
The wind cries. What about Eric Clapton? Yes, he's English and he's English and he's English. Oh yes, I was making fun of you but now I'm making fun of myself.
He's English and he says. Yeah. What about cocaine? He says it because the English guy goes.
Yeah. Cocaine. Cocaine. He doesn't do that.
We're sort of for whiz. What? Whiz. Isn't that Coke?
Is it? I think so. Whiz is something. Is that why Khalifa is like he's.
No, he's I'm assuming he's American. Like Johnny Rock. I make it my business to not know anything. Tony.
Yeah, yo. Any musician is released in the last one of yours. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, probably.
So far so good. It's not that difficult. When you're old. Every now and again I dip in to see what the kids are into.
Wait till you choose to get a little older then you'll be forced to brush up against it. Right. What is your car? What does it go like?
Can I have the phone to make songs and I go yeah of course and then all of a sudden it's just hellacious. Just absolute dog turds. Did they ever, like is my kids? Everybody's a bitch.
My kids are total like they run the stereo in my car but they only listen to me. They only listen to stuff that's even older than the stuff that I listen to. Did your kids go through a phase like that? Tiger used to like.
Bob Marley. Yeah, Bob Marley first and then what was the one that he always started playing and it was actually like my favorite. Slide the family stone. Yeah, he was playing slide the family stone but there was his song that was like Super B track that he was into and he used to try and play it all the time to annoy me because I didn't like to start of it and then I got into it because I heard it so much but yeah he was totally into that he knows that but he's also now into like I don't know the names of them.
They're embarrassing. It's the one where everyone's a rapper and they are super angry or really rich and everyone's a bitch. As far as I can tell I mean they might they are rappers and probably really rich. If they're talking about their contemporaries if they think that the other guy's a bitch they're probably right.
Right. I'm not saying they're lying. I'm just saying that's what they're putting down. Katie do you know who the kids listen to?
The only one that I can think of off the top of my head is Yeet. Yee. Tiger loves Yeet. Yeah.
Not Yeet. Right. No I understand. Why EAT?
Throw. His name is. No that's why EAT. It's totally different.
Yeah. Because my son eats everything. There's a lot of eating going on in my household. Everybody we're talking to you again about Factor America's number one ready to eat meal kit.
Look we've all had a terrific time this winter but now if you're anything like me you are a little too fluffy and it is well past time you did something about it. Beach bod season is right around the corner and nobody is more serious about having a six pack for summer than this guy. That's why I'll be looking into Factor Chef prepared meals, delicious, nutritious calorie smart meals around 550 calories. They send them to me, Michael.
They're good. I eat them all. It is healthy. It is delicious.
It is easy and let's not forget fast if you're ordering from all the meal delivery services it could take a half hour. It could take an hour and a half. Two minutes in the microwave and Bob's your uncle. Two minutes.
Factor. Get in my belly. Head to factor meals dot com slash Alice 50 and use the code Alice 50 to get 50% off your first box. That's code Alice 50 at factor meals dot com slash Alice 50 to get 50% off your first box.
Yeah. You never forget your first box. That's basically 11. Alright.
It's pretty lit. Wait, sus? Yeah. Suss is.
But that's old. Well, I don't know. Did you say sus grown up? Yeah.
We didn't. Yeah, that's sus. That might be an Australian thing where we show up and stuff. Exactly.
Exactly. Because that's an outback one for sure. Nah, he's sus mate. No.
No, that was pretty hot in the third grade. Oh, okay. Yeah. And now fourth grade was yeet.
I'm waiting for the next banger. Fire. People say fire when they're cool. Right.
Straight fire. Yeah. That was straight fire. Yeah.
What'd you do yourself? I was a good kid. I was coming in here and I was coming in backwards. And my wheel clip the coping.
So I stepped off as I was in the impact zone, going backwards. And I hit my hip and I tweaked my dead person's knee. But I didn't even know that. Because when I hit my hip I just pinched something in my lower back.
And I was like, oh man, I think I'm gonna slip something. And then when I tried to drop in and get my phone it pinched and I had to tighten my stomach to not collapse. And I was like, oh man. That's not good.
And then driving home just aiken. The car ride was three hours. hours. Right.
And that was not cool. But I think it might, I don't know, Dr. Ellis, I don't know if I did a spinal injury. I feel more like the torn groin and then hitting the back toward the front of the groin and the back.
Like I think I caused more damage because it's like shooting down the side of my leg. So it's like something's pinched in my right hip. I don't know what it is, but Everlast called me today and he's like, did I saw you're a post? I know the guy and hook me up with this guy.
So on Friday, I get two hours of body work. So hopefully the pain goes away a little bit. But I got light. I just put a lot of cane patches on it for the show.
And they're not doing anything. I wouldn't expect they would. And I'm just currently sleep. But it's also, I did it skateboarding.
So I don't, it doesn't bum me out. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. It doesn't.
It's not, I don't feel like, man, you know, what are you going to grow up? Jesus, I do don't do it. I fell on my ass. Like, I forget this always happened.
You know, I can, I'm like, Oh, man, I told my going, Oh, man, am I hip? Like the last two times I've hurt myself. Yeah, that's what happens there. Like I skated with Kevin Star, Tony Hawk and Bucky Lassick.
Everybody's 50 or over, you know, like Kevin's like 56, I think Tony's 54 were all old Kevin's coming back from a broken female. Tony's coming back from a broken female. You know, like Kevin's not like the ultimate athlete and Kevin was doing stuff yesterday where if it went wrong, it's over on, you know, because if you're a 50, 60-year-old guy and you can do head high aerials. Yeah, you're good enough to seriously, you're going to be really good to get a couple of bad.
Like a couple of times he did some bigger hairs and I remember being nervous because it looked fine. It didn't look like it was bad. It's just it was just like, what if it went wrong? Right.
How bad? How hurt would you be? What's what's Bucky up to now? Still ripping.
I think he's more into cars. That's like his, I think he got a lot of money from skateboarding. I hope so. He deserves it.
He's still really good and he's doing like a bunch of different tricks that no one else is doing. But I don't think that the, the popularity, you know, like vert skating still not popular and he's from the older generation and still in the mix with the new guys. So the new guys are going to get more money because they've got like a cooler Instagram or something like that. So he's sure he could be better than them, but they could be more effective tools for selling.
That seems to be what's happening. So he's not, this is just outside looking in. I don't think he's getting what he should be getting. Right.
And I don't know, man, I mean, he, he's scared yesterday and was doing stuff that nobody in the world can do. He did it all day. I just don't know how many people pay a tons of money for that anymore. You kind of have to have a gimmick.
Yeah. I think I realized right now, like, I mean, I'm not crapping anybody, but there's another guy that has a mega ramp and he's backyard. He's awesome, too. I don't think he's as good as Bucky, but because he's got that ramp and he does those big jumps all the time.
Yeah. People like that on Instagram. So he's worth more to, to, I mean, he went to a monster, you know, like the big guys, the big paychecks. So he's got a monster deal because he's always doing new jumps over that gap that kind of go viral, you know, because people don't skate, go, whoa, and it's justified.
He's really cool, but there's just not that much going around. So if you're not him, you're, you're, you're, Bucky's a phenomenon, like it's kind of insane to, you know, we're some of the best in the world, but we're in our fifties and we're not that good anymore. And he's like, I don't know, one year younger than me or something. And he's amazing.
So, but I don't think it's a big financial thing, but I know he's got a race team. And I think he makes car part like I think he has an actual, like a team or a shop that make stuff. And I know he's got like a big deal with Subaru and all that stuff. So it still seems, seems pretty cool, but I don't think it's like it, in my opinion, what it should be.
Right. Like he should be showing up loaded. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But at least it sounds like what he has going for him is now he gets to skate on his terms for the right reasons.
Yeah. Because you see a lot of people where it was really good, but they didn't save their money and now maybe they don't, maybe their heart really is, they'll say all the right stuff, but they don't really really want to be there. It's like, he's got his money. We assume we hope and he's got ways of generating income moving into the future.
So what motivates him skating wise is, you know, competing against himself and how long can he still belong on a ramp with us? If people have his age, people have third his age. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Less now. Right. Because there's a new generation of really little people that are doing crazy stuff.
Yeah. Well, that's good. Yeah. He's never been a gimmick guy.
I hate people. It just goes down gimmicks. Mm hmm. I would both love a couple of people.
Anyway, let's see. There's some news in the world of douches. Yeah. If only we had some sort of intro.
He's news when he broke on coz I do. Do you think I do do. Oh, I should have thought about that. Do you snooze?
Yeah. For just playing an intro. Yeah. Ben, your one is a great Australian.
She has got a foul mouth on mine. Yes. Gutter mouth. Yeah.
That's what they call it among other things. They are reportedly having trouble finding people any musical act of any note whatsoever to perform at the coronation of the new King of England. Yeah. And I asked you coronation that means making him king.
Yes. Corona crown. Nobody wants to go. Like put it this way.
What's wrong with him? What did he do? I thought he was all right. I don't think he's like problematic.
You know, like he's been on the right side of like the libtard stuff. You know, like, hey, his big cause. Cause I think being a prince was a lot like being a first lady, you know, the first ladies in America that always have their cause. Yeah.
But it's always something completely not controversial. Like literacy. Nobody gets angry about that. So put in bombs in the ground.
Exactly. His big thing when he was Prince that I'm aware of was fighting genetically modified foods. Oh, yeah. It's a weird one.
It's kind of a strange one to throw all your capital behind. But remember there was a news story going around like a week ago about their son's study make up this what you will that there's certain cancers that there's more of an America than there are in Europe. Yeah. A bunch of European scientists were like, a da, remember all that stuff that we barred from our food?
Cause we said it was cancer causing a da. So I mean, fertilizers and stuff and GMOs or two different things. But anyway, I'm not aware of him being hated. I just think nobody likes it.
Yeah. Hey, it's pretty lame. And everybody loved. He could lady die.
Everybody loved die. And it's like, yeah, it's like when everybody hangs out with a couple and a couple breaks up and everybody hangs out with one of them and we talked to that guy anymore. He's like the literal king of that. It isn't there like a bunch of bums that want to get a spotlight.
You would think so. Like who's in second? Right. You would think Spice Girls said no.
Oh, right. We're gonna have to go pretty far down. Dude, that is already low. I thought I was joking.
They wouldn't really invite them. So you invited the Spice Girls and they said no. So maybe the King of England. No, you're not.
If you're gonna be the King of England, you should be able to understand you're not gonna get what about a clown? Could they hire a bet? They could probably be. Manchester's finest party clown.
Wayne Gacy. So look, like I would think because it's not like I would think most presidents. Well, that's difficult because people don't want to be with this president because they represent that party or whatever. But there's a new president every four eight years.
There has not been a new a new coronation to perform at since well before rock and roll was invented. Right. So in theory, too bad he's window too bad legendary. He's been to me.
Hendricks is no longer here. Right. He would have been perfect. Right.
What about Eric Clapton? I don't know if they've asked Eric Clapton. Do you think what about? Okay.
Let me ask. I got it. Yeah. Elton John.
Elton John is out on his farewell tour and says he has dates. I think the day before and the day after in like Germany. Yeah. And he's just he says it's too much.
He knows this lady guy. He represents a representative between the lines. Yeah, seriously between the lines. What an insult to ask him.
Right. Because you put him in a spot where he's like, I gotta say no to the King. What about the guy that said, I don't like Mondays. Bob Guildoff Yeah.
What about Sir Bob Guildoff? The field is probably available. We'll put it in that song for him. You can if anybody remembers it other than you.
I love that song. That's great. What about silver chair? They're part of the commonwealth.
They are that's tomorrow. Probably right now, Charles is underlings are on the phone negotiating a night for Sir Silver chair. Well deserved. Well deserved.
Too bad in excess guy died. He would have been perfect. He would have been hutchins. I love to Pigeonsen.
Michael Hutchinsen. So Elton John was Dye's Robra. But he's also Sir Elton John. And you don't get the night hood without Prince Charles's mummy.
Yeah. So wouldn't he's he says return the favor. Wouldn't you feel so blind? Be holding?
He's not but he's not because he's lady diaspora. He's not going to. He knows it's all his fault. Harry Styles.
He's huge. He says the American says he needs to take a nap. No, he is no, he's English. I don't know him.
I'm I'm pretty cool, man. I don't watch Harry Styles. Harry Styles is pretty cool. Yeah.
He's still there. I bet you know one or two of his songs and you just don't know that. I bet you I don't. Yeah.
That's what I said about a lot of things. And then I saw Rihanna at the Super Bowl and I was like, Oh, that's her. Oh, that's her. Oh, yeah.
That's her. Oh, yeah. Just out there. Some stuff.
You kind of can't miss him. Harry Styles is British Justin Timberlake. Okay. He's the pop star that it's okay for.
He won't. He said flat out. No. He said that him and his band need to rest in between.
That's flat out. No. That's crazy. You need to rest.
Yeah, that's not. Can't come out in the lip sync. I know. And just say no.
Like don't be that. I mean, you know, that's I guess you got to be professional, but I've got to rest is no. It's a no. Hey, man.
Come on birthday. I've got to rest. That's a no. There's no other way around.
Okay. Who you are. If you ask a girl on a date, she goes here's the thing. I'm just really tired.
I'm going to have to take a nap all weekend. That's a no. That's really bad. That's bad.
So she would have a natural yet. Good Ed Sheeran Prince Charles and Ed Sheeran. It's just so perfect together. I know.
I don't think do it. Sheeran's too cool for it. Man, that is harsh. I know.
What about Aussie? Aussie. I can see over in England. He said he was moving there.
Yeah. Because Aussie retired from Torring said he can't fly around anymore. All right. So he went back.
He could do it. Even at that. I'm wondering. He loves the king.
Is Aussie has enough time passed that even the most lame old people in England have gotten the message that Aussie isn't actually satanic? Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. Right.
Because I had to. Oh, yeah. They could tie that back and be like, you know, my Christmas darkness. My name is Michael.
The king. So that means the king is Pete on Alamo, the King of Darkness. Right. Exactly.
Yeah. You can't do it. I mean, you should do that. It would actually make him cool.
It was as close to cool as he could get if he was the King of Darkness. How is he not the King of Darkness of the Prince of Darkness? Nice. It was the King.
I really think it's such a huge missed opportunity. There's nobody is blowing it right. There's nobody to tell this guy. No, what about you could come out on the day of his coordination.
He's been so late for so long. He could come out with purple smoke. Oh, like a vampire. Yes.
Oh, put the little pot there like this point. He smiles. He's got fangs. I'm like, what?
He's a vampire. No, he's the King of Darkness. Yeah. Yeah.
And then he makes a speech and then he got the castle. It's not raining and it goes dark. It is time for me to rule. And Aussie's like, yeah.
Oh, you know, he knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew, knew. It's so cool. And he just starts for we would be all about him. We would be all about he would be so big on TikTok the next day.
Oh, you'd roll a TikTok or you'd be the king of. Do you roll a TikTok? You roll the world. That's a way that works.
It's not too late. He could move to the Beverly Hills. And like, you know, do bad stuff. They brought him out of a coffin.
Hands. He rises where he's got his hands like this, but he rises for his heels up to his feet with like magic and he does a thing like that. He's got all these graphics of his mom with like red eyes, his mother's Yeah, the Blues Brothers with the sister, she walks and she flies, she doesn't step. It will surprise you to learn that I've never seen the Blues Brothers.
What the hell? That's a good movie. I tried. Wait, you've tried to watch it and you were like lame?
Yeah, I don't like their music. That's a problem I have. Like the long scene where they're performing with the Blues Musicians. I know I'm supposed to be excited that that's a Rethofrancling who's playing like a waitress.
You better think. Two packs of cigarettes, a full tank of gas and ten hours to Chicago, right? Look, if you're gonna, if you don't want to watch it, don't watch it, but don't be crappin' on it. That's not cool.
That's the thing, it's a good movie. I'm not defending it, doesn't need to be defended. It's an amazing movie. You don't get it.
Yeah, I honestly don't. I've never really, and I like John Volusi. Dan Aykroy's a different story. I think the time has come for us to realize that Dan Aykroy was never actually funny.
So you're stumped, but what about... I'm thinking about... I know, keep thinking. Wow, right?
Pretty amazing. How did he do that? He's so funny. He's got the right friends.
He never did anything funny. Cheesy as hell. He had some moments like in the Great Outdoors with John Candy where he goes, Hey, if I could get a couple of desserts in him, can we get some t-shirts for the kids too? Okay, yeah, yeah, that guy was good.
That guy. That guy. That guy. That guy.
That guy. That's peak acroid. That was pretty good, though. That was a range.
He had a range. That's a lot to coast on. So the Spice Girls have scheduling conflicts. Yeah, well, they kick it off by the fun together.
Because the horn knows everybody needs... What about just Victoria? What about David Beckham? What's it gonna do?
Just come out there and kick soccer balls into the crowd? Kick his head off. Just suck a kick Prince Charles' head off. I'm the king.
So... That would be a better king. David Beckham is the king of England, would be, that makes sense. So the people who are rumored to be next in line to perform at the coronation.
Oh, here we go. And he could have. B-side. I cannot stress this enough.
You could have any satanic metal band. They would all, they would cancel festivals to come and perform at the coronation. If only you would let them. Ah, was it a bituary?
Yeah. Those guys are ready to go. Those guys. And they will put on a show.
They always do. They don't find it in Michael. No, no, no, no. What about Kelly Osborn?
I now, not you. You know what I mean? Sir Kelly. The king.
So, Robbie Williams. Oh yeah. Wait, no way Robbie said no. That's impossible.
Robbie, it was in a boy group. That's where he came from. It's like they're in sync called Take That. So the British media said, you know, they've got their sources.
Sometimes they know what they're talking about. Sometimes they don't, but they're not completely making this up. They're saying it seems like it's coming down to either Robbie Williams old group without Robbie Williams. You can't.
Man, that isn't. Or, or, or legendary Englishman Lionel Richie. Yeah, he's totally American. He's in the Commodore, right?
Yeah, like I used to sing Brick House. But Lionel Richie is legendary. Yeah. You cannot have Robbie Williams band without Robbie Williams.
You can't. Can you have Robbie Williams band with Lionel Richie? No. No.
Or somebody called Ollie Merse. No. What about that? What about Ollie Merse?
What about Ollie Merse? Yeah. They won't do it. But what about like, did he ask?
Did he ask Led Zeppelin? Did he ask Paul McCartney? Are they just like such a foregone conclusion? Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Say what you will about England? Isn't he Sir Polk McCartney?
He has to be on. Right? So that makes sense. He should be able to, you know what he should be able to get is, um, he should be able to get a supergroup.
Like he should get Mick Jagger, Paul McCartney, Pete Townsend, and Robert Plant to do barbershop quartet. Yeah. Yeah. That would be flexing.
No, I don't understand how that isn't happening. Or just go hard blackmail. What some of these old people would have, if the king died earlier and Prince Charles became the king in the 80s, it would have been pumping. Or not.
I would think so. I just think at the end of the day, you might not be that excited about Charles, but he's not like a terrible person. It's not like he's universally hated. People just kind of don't like him all that much.
He's just sort of there. He's lame. He's just kind of lame. At a certain point, isn't it less about Charles and more about boy, little, little Mick Jagger never could have imagined one day.
Yeah. Right. Right. Rod Stewart.
Wait, he wouldn't do it. He's not on the list that I'm looking at, but Rod Stewart, Rod Stewart's. He lives in Beverly Hills. Not too cool to do anything.
He flies planes and chariotes. Yeah. What about a famous English actor? You're talking about, they need to do a show.
Is that what you're saying? They have to sing? I think that's the idea. All right, that's different.
You got to be cool. Is if you got the second book, you got the Sex Pistols, the same God save the queen. You could also go fully punk rock. Yeah.
That would, if you just showed up. These are some great ideas. It's better than 11 face beers. The Spice Girls is, that would have been so depressing.
Yeah. Like you got the Spice Girls. Why would you get the Spice Girls? It's like an insult to England.
Try to say England hasn't done anything since the Spice Girls. You know? Right. And again, you get to choose from everything that's happening.
The Stones won't do it. That's insane. Wait, are they American? They are not.
Right. So what the hell? I don't know. I don't get this.
I thought those old guys love the royalty. Well, again, if you accept the night hood, if you take the sort of tap, I just assume you're in for this thing. What about Sting? He's American.
No, he's her sting. Okay. That's what I'm saying. If he's not, he will be.
That doesn't work. No, it doesn't. What's his name? Like Gordon Sumner?
What about Gordon Ramsay? He could just go out there. He's English. He could cook him like a crepe.
Right. And be like, here you go. You're a royal prick. Get that up.
Yeah, that would be some insane gallantry. Oh, he could just get him to sing. He won't be a monofil. Yeah.
Spice Girls. Come up. He goes out there and does Elton Johnson and styles in Spice Girls. He does three songs in there.
Oh, the greatest English. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. But, and it gets, you can do that.