WHAT REALLY HAPPENED TO ME ON AYAHUASCA

In this deeply personal solo episode, host Salma Hindy shares what really happened during six ayahuasca ceremonies in Egypt: including visions involving family trauma, religion, sexuality, heartbreak, vaginismus, emotionally unavailable men, and the hidden emotional pain carried through generations. What begins as a spiritual exploration slowly turns into something far more unsettling, healing, and transformative.Across multiple ceremonies led by facilitators, shamans, and complete chaos in the Sinai desert, Salma describes purging grief from her body, revisiting childhood wounds, confronting her relationship to men and “the male energy,” and uncovering disturbing patterns surrounding shame, consent, religion, and silence within Muslim families. The episode also explores the emotional aftermath of loss, creative collapse, romantic heartbreak, and the search for spiritual meaning during periods of deep isolation.This episode contains discussions of sexual assault, trauma, religion, mental health, plant medicine, and family abuse. It also somehow includes: Quran played during ayahuasca ceremonies, hot tattooed Egyptians, shared puke buckets in the desert, a Brazilian shaman threatening to cancel a retreat, a Taylor Swift ego death moment, and Salma sobbing over a 21-year-old while being held by a man who looked like he walked off the set of Gladiator. Proceed carefully.Content Warning: This episode contains discussions of sexual assault, marital coercion, family trauma, religion, mental health, and plant medicine.HELP KEEP THE POD ALIVE FOR 2026, DONATE TO OUR GOFUNDME: https://gofund.me/f646f3082 CREDITS:  Host & Creator: Salma Hindy Executive Producer: Salma Hindy Videographer & Sound Engineer: Patrick Samaha Written By: Salma Hindy  Edited By: Salma Hindy  Studio: 30 Irving Studios  Artwork: Rana Omar© The Secret Sex Lives of Muslim Women, 2026Instagram: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenYouTube: @thesecretsexlivesofmuslimwomenHOST'S INSTAGRAM: @salma.hindyHOST'S TIKTOK: @salma.hindy