What runDisney's Dopey Challenge Taught Me About Raising Big-Feeling Kids (Boundaries, Pacing, and Repair)

Episode summary In this behind-the-curtain episode, Dr. Amy Patenaude shares what runDisney's Dopey Challenge (four races in four days) taught her about endurance parenting—especially in the after-school hours when everyone's bandwidth is gone. You'll get a brain-based way to think about pacing, boundaries, Plan B moments, and repair—plus copy/paste school advocacy language and Tiny Wins you can try this week. In this episode you'll learn How to shift from "fix it today" to an endurance question: "What makes later easier?" Why after-school meltdowns often mean "you hit a hard mile," not "you're doing it wrong." The brain-based reason lectures flop at 4:12 p.m. (thinking brain quieter, survival brain louder) and what helps instead. A gentle hot take: boundaries aren't punishment—they're pacing (the pace your family can hold). The "minivan option" for parenting: Plan B + helpers + basic regulation moves when the schedule (or your nervous system) falls apart. Exactly what "repair" can sound like when your tone shows up—and how to do a do-over without a shame spiral. Tiny Wins to try this week Ask the dress-rehearsal question each morning: "What makes later easier?" Add a 10-minute decompression buffer after school (food/water/quiet/movement—whatever your child tolerates). Hold one Balloon Lady boundary kindly: one pace line (homework cutoff, screen transition, one thing). Put your "medic tent" list on a sticky note: Pause. Water. Food. Fewer words. Repair. Make one deposit before a demand: "I'm glad you're home." A hug. A joke. A cookie. Yes, it counts. Pick one. One is enough. Free resources Big Feelings Decoder — understand what's underneath the meltdown and what to do next without turning it into a power struggle: https://psyched2parent.myflodesk.com/bigfeelingsdecoder Research snapshot (brief) Amy uses plain-language nervous-system science to explain why reasoning and "better lectures" don't land when a kid (or parent) is overwhelmed: the thinking brain gets quieter and the survival brain gets louder, so the most effective next step is often regulation first (food, water, movement, quiet, connection), then problem-solving. Disclaimer This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical, psychological, or legal advice. Listening to this podcast does not create a provider-client relationship. If you're concerned about your child's mental health, safety, or development, please consult a qualified professional in your area.