What to Do When Someone Rejects Your Apology

You went to the person. You told them you were sorry. And they didn't accept it. Maybe they told you it was too late. Maybe they got up and left the conversation without saying anything at all. Most of us grew up with a simple picture of how this is supposed to work. You apologize and they forgive you. Things go back to normal. When the second half never comes, you're left holding something you already paid for with nowhere to put it.So you start second-guessing the apology itself. Maybe you said it wrong. Maybe you waited too long. You think about going back and saying it again, better this time, and somewhere in there you know that a second run at it would be more about your relief than about them.This episode opens with David, who had spent years running from King Saul. Saul had turned on him out of jealousy and hunted him through the wilderness with an army, though David had served him faithfully and even married into his family. Then Saul walked alone into the cave where David and his men were hiding, defenseless, with his back turned. David's men were certain God had handed the king over. David rose and crept toward him with a blade.Psalm 34:14 speaks directly to that moment: "Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it." Search for peace. Work to maintain it. Both of those are things you do with your own hands, and neither one arrives on command. Look at what the verse assigns you: the searching and the work. The other person's answer was never on your list. Paul says the same thing in Romans 12. As much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. That phrase is a limit, and the limit is a mercy.So a finished apology looks like this. You named the thing you did without softening it, and you didn't attach conditions. Then you stopped. If that's what happened, the apology is complete whether or not they received it. God measures your repentance by what you brought Him. Bart shares his own version of this, an apology he made as a youth pastor that a father would not take, and a man who left the church over it. David learned the same lesson the long way. He cut a corner from Saul's robe and let the king walk out alive. Saul wept and confessed, and before long the chase started up again anyway.BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU'LL DISCOVER:What makes an apology complete even when the other person refuses itHow Psalm 34:14 marks the boundary between your part and theirsWhat David did when the man he had spared came after him againYou can search for peace and work to maintain it. You cannot hand it to someone who won't take it. Do your part and keep your hands clean. Leave the rest with God.Share This Episode:https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/322Need Prayer? Leave me a voicemail:https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/voicemailWant to keep these devotions coming? Please consider supporting this podcast.https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/support/Rate and Reviewhttps://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/reviews/new/Connect with BartFacebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/dailydevotionsforbusylivesWebsite: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.comFeeling spiritually drained? Start here. Download your free copy of my eBook Making Time for Jesus here: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/subscribe.