What We Think We Know: The Myth That Avoiding Conflict Protects Relationships

Don't rock the boat. Pick your battles. Some things aren't worth fighting over. These are the phrases we reach for when conflict feels like too much, and they feel like wisdom. But according to decades of relationship research, they may be some of the most damaging communication habits we have. Welcome to Things We Think We Know, a new special segment where we take the beliefs about communication we've accepted as truth and hold them up to the light. In this first episode, we examine the myth that avoiding conflict protects relationships: where it comes from, what the research from John Gottman and others actually shows, and why unresolved conflict doesn't disappear; it just goes underground and compounds. If you've ever told yourself you were keeping the peace, this episode is for you.