When Attachment Feels Obsessive, Confusing, and Shameful

There's a kind of attachment pattern that feels confusing, overwhelming… and often deeply shameful. In this conversation, Leah shares her experience of growing up highly independent — while also finding herself becoming intensely attached to one person at a time. That pattern followed her into relationships, and eventually into therapy… where things became much more complicated. We talk about: what it feels like when attachment becomes obsessive or all-consuming the shame of needing someone "too much" how independence can mask a deep longing for connection what can happen when therapy boundaries become unclear or unsafe and how hard it is to recognize what's happening when you're in it We also explore the subtle (and not-so-subtle) red flags that can show up in therapy — especially when there's a power dynamic — and how easy it is to lose your footing when attachment needs are strong. This is a vulnerable and honest conversation about attachment, confusion, and the longing for connection — and the importance of awareness when something doesn't feel right. If you've ever felt like: "Why am I like this?" "Why can't I let go?" or "This doesn't feel right, but I don't understand why…" you're not alone. Your Voice Matters If this episode brought something up for you and you'd like to share a reflection or response, you're invited to do so below: Click here to leave feedback You can share as much or as little as you want, and you can remain anonymous. Continue the conversation: I share reflections on attachment, trauma, and the therapy relationship on Instagram @shayahecht About H.I.P. Counseling Center: Learn more about our trauma-informed practice and offerings at www.hipcounseling.com or on instagram @hipcounselingcenter.  Subscribe & Review: If this conversation resonated with you, please subscribe to the HIP Podcast on your favorite podcast app. Leaving a review helps others who need to hear these stories find their way here.