EPISODE · Jul 9, 2026 · 14 MIN
When Betrayal Begins Before an Affair
from The Affair Recovery Room · host Tim Tedder
In this first PageTalk episode of the podcast, Tim revisits his recent article The Betrayal Often Begins Before the Affair, which was posted on AffairHealing.com. Written after the release of the previous episode (Unshakeable), the article explores how betrayal often begins long before an affair, in the quiet erosion of a couple's emotional connection. Tim shares his own reflection on breaking his marriage promises years before his affair began, then makes room for another side of the story: a conversation with Steve, a client who felt the article told only half the truth. Steve describes years of feeling emotionally shut out by his wife before his own affair, and Tim uses the conversation to explore Esther Perel's insight that "the victim of the affair is not always the victim of the marriage," suggesting that both partners in a struggling marriage can find the humility to look back and the hope to move forward.LINKS and EXTRASEpisode Page: https://www.affairhealing.com/podcasts/065Article: The Betrayal Often Begins Before the AffairBuilding US Course & CoachingPodcast Episode: A Conversation with My Ex, part 1Need personal help? Schedule a Session with one of our coaches.
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What this episode covers
Betrayal doesn't always start with an affair; sometimes it starts years earlier, in the slow erosion of connection. In this first PageTalk episode, Tim revisits his article "The Betrayal Often Begins Before the Affair" and talks with a client whose own experience complicates its take. It's an honest look at how both partners can contribute to disconnection long before infidelity enters the picture.
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When Betrayal Begins Before an Affair
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