When Co-Parenting Messages Make You Doubt Yourself

In this episode, I talk about a communication pattern that so many people experience in emotionally abusive and high-conflict relationships—but rarely have language for.It’s the moment when a message sounds reasonable on paper, calm in tone, even “child-focused”… and yet your body reacts immediately.I walk through what’s happening when someone says all the right things while doing the opposite—hiding control behind concern, and contradiction behind “cooperation.” I use a real client example from co-parenting to show how this plays out in everyday emails about clothing, schedules, school, and parenting decisions—and how quickly it turns into self-doubt, over-explaining, and emotional exhaustion.In this episode, I share:Why these interactions feel so destabilizing even when they look calmHow contradictory communication pulls you into constant self-defenseWhat to look for when words and actions don’t line upWhy this isn’t a communication problem—and why you’re not overreactingHow to begin tracking patterns so you can stop gaslighting yourselfIf you’ve ever read a message and thought, “Why do I feel like I’m losing my footing right now?” this episode is for you.This episode is a re-record of the Double Speak episode because I did not know there was noise in the background!Support the show*Please Note: there is a long intro that explains my services. If you do not want to listen, just fast-forward 5 mins past. This intro will be changed in future recordings to be shorter. I am not paid to record this podcast and it is a free offering. Offering my work is the only way I can sustain the podcast*Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your RelationshipWebsite: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.comInstagram: @emotionalabusecoachEmail: [email protected]{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner