As I've talked about before on here, honesty is one of my, if not my biggest value, but I've realized that it's not the armaments when I am willing to violate it for what I want. What do I mean by that? There are moments where emotionally I don't want honesty. And it's not, it seems to be somewhat personal.
I don't want people to like to. I mean, I could, no, I don't want people to like me, but I'm willing to like myself. I'm willing to believe that someone else believes something because it makes me feel better. Why is that?
I think it comes from a place where I value my mental health more than I thought. Why is my laptop warming up? Why is my laptop hurting you? I value my mental health more than anything else because if I'm not at my best mentally, I can't treat the people around me the best that I can treat them.
And so I'm willing to sacrifice some of my values for, and that sounds harsher than it actually is. I'm willing to ignore honesty and just lie to myself about something, to feel better, temporarily, not forever temporarily, so that I am able to treat the people around me the best and I am able, and not to make it sound selfless, and that I am able to feel better because I don't like how certain things feel. And although I'm willing to look at things in the eyes, there comes a point where you come to an understanding and say, okay, I know what I'm not feeling good about. I can't keep staring at it, but it's only going to get better with time.
So to ease it at some point, once you know what it is to ease it, then that's when you get an idea of yourself. And actually I'm going to go on attention and talk about something else. I've realized recently that what I want. Again, I will never mind.
Thank you for listening. Have a great day. I'm Robin.