Who Actually Gets Invited to the Table

Every community has a guest list — and every guest list has an unspoken logic about who makes the cut. Tochi digs into why we default to inviting people who already look, think, and live like us, and what gets lost when we do. Using Encanto's "We don't talk about Bruno" and Janelle Monáe's Dirty Computer as entry points, Tochi traces a throughline: families, institutions, and even religious spaces have a habit of erasing whoever makes them uncomfortable. Then he turns to a 2,000-year-old story Jesus told about a dinner party that gets radically reorganized — not around status, but around who's been left out. The question underneath it all: what would it take to actually widen the circle, instead of just saying we want to? If you've ever felt like the "difficult" one in a room, this one's for you.