Why Do I Feel Safer Expecting Disappointment? | Consolidation Epi 137 episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 14, 2026 · 25 MIN

Why Do I Feel Safer Expecting Disappointment? | Consolidation Epi 137

from The Narcissism Decoder · host Dr. Anthony Mazzella

This is another consolidation episode based on clinical work with a patient who recognized that he organizes his relationships around anticipated disappointment. When things are going well, he becomes anxious and uneasy, almost waiting for the other shoe to drop. In this episode, we explore the psychodynamic function of expecting disappointment, and why predictable letdowns can sometimes feel safer than the uncertainty of trust, hope, and real dependency in relationships.If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.  Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here  Next Meeting: Stay Tuned!  Contact me Directly with observations, questions or comments:  [email protected] You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on: https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/ https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder  Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.comDr. Anthony Mazzella is a psychoanalyst and psychodynamic psychotherapist specializing in narcissism, personality disorders, and relational dynamics.

This is another consolidation episode based on clinical work with a patient who recognized that he organizes his relationships around anticipated disappointment. When things are going well, he becomes anxious and uneasy, almost waiting for the other shoe to drop. In this episode, we explore the psychodynamic function of expecting disappointment, and why predictable letdowns can sometimes feel safer than the uncertainty of trust, hope, and real dependency in relationships. If you are intereste...

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Why Do I Feel Safer Expecting Disappointment? | Consolidation Epi 137

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This episode was published on March 14, 2026.

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This is another consolidation episode based on clinical work with a patient who recognized that he organizes his relationships around anticipated disappointment. When things are going well, he becomes anxious and uneasy, almost waiting for the other...

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