'Why does experience change so dramatically?' Listener question

If you can speak to why experience shifts so radically from day to day in this exploration as ....it's perplexing. Yesterday was nearly a full day of in and out of suicide ideation, intense heat/pain/anguish and a deep desire to die. Then today somehow all of that was gone. I read an email a student sent that yesterday felt super attacking and led to a spiral of shame... to today it seeming more like information about what I could have done differently as an instructor to provide clarity. What's happening? Why is this so inconsistent? What happened from yesterday to today that the same content is not having the same level of intense reactivity?