Why Former Boarders Become Perfectionists — And Burn Out | Piers Cross episode artwork

EPISODE · Sep 16, 2026 · 16 MIN

Why Former Boarders Become Perfectionists — And Burn Out | Piers Cross

from An Evolving Man Podcast · host Piers Cross

Why do so many former boarders struggle with perfectionism, overworking and the feeling that they are never quite good enough?In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the link between boarding school syndrome, perfectionism, the inner critic and burnout.At boarding school, mistakes can carry a social cost. Vulnerability may be hidden, everyone else can appear to have it “sorted”, and achievement becomes a way of proving our worth. Underneath can sit a much deeper belief:“I’m not good enough.”Piers explores: Why boarding school can encourage perfectionism  The fear of mistakes, failure and vulnerability  Fixed mindset versus growth mindset  The link between perfectionism and the brutal inner critic  How perfectionism can create burnout and an inability to switch off  Why control can become a childhood survival strategy  Learning to replace impossible standards with “I’m good enough” Using calm, mindfulness and self-compassion to change the pattern Drawing on Pete Walker’s Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving and Emma Seppälä’s The Happiness Track, Piers offers practical ways to begin loosening perfectionism.  🌐 Find out more about Piers Cross: https://piers-cross.com#BoardingSchoolSyndrome #Perfectionism #Burnout---Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community Many blessings, Piers Cross http://piers-cross.com/ 

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Why do so many former boarders struggle with perfectionism, overworking and the feeling that they are never quite good enough? In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, Piers Cross explores the link between boarding school syndrome, perfectionism, the inner critic and burnout. At boarding school, mistakes can carry a social cost. Vulnerability may be hidden, everyone else can appear to have it “sorted”, and achievement becomes a way of proving our worth. Underneath can sit a much deeper bel...

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Why Former Boarders Become Perfectionists — And Burn Out | Piers Cross

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