You are now entering Nowhere California. If you love what you hear, you can find us on your favorite podcast search engines and subscribe. And also, if you don't mind, leave us a like or review. And if hearing us is not enough, you can always get your Nowhere California fix by going to Nowhere California.com.
And you can send your thoughts, ideas, or some random bullshit, to all you know, which is Nowhere Underscore California at Yahoo.com. Don't forget, we are Nowhere California. Ideas from everywhere, Voices from Nowhere since 2001. This is Doug.
This is Doug. This is Doug. I'm not saying I'm not from my name. You're kind of contractually out of YouTube.
You're like, fuck? Yeah. This is Way Me To Find Prince. Way Me To Find Prince.
That's why I look like Prince. Ah, fine. This is Nick. And this is Nowhere California presents Why?
Crow Wicked Prayer. I'm not even going to do this. What? Nick, just be glad it's not the Apple again.
I might take the Apple over this. Yeah, I don't like it there. So, you know what? There's not even a Apple in the movie.
I promise you, I'm not going to be walking out of this going, you know, I don't want to be looking at them anymore. I might want to be looking at them after this one. Because if you're new to this type of episode from Nowhere, a while ago we started a tradition of allies. It was a normal discussion of movies.
And then Mike Dumbass had the bright idea of making the commentaries. Because why not just torture ourselves a little bit fucking more for art, right? Oh, my lord. Because our is pain.
You know this. We should start doing a blood drive at the same time. So we can fucking bleed at the same time or what we can't do. We can't call it a blood drive.
We have to call it a blood-leading. It's funny you use the word art, Doug, because I remember from your podcast that something I'm going to understand modern art. This is another piece of it. Yeah.
I'll never understand modern art. I really won't. No, to give you guys a quick overview, the Crow, the original, Brandon Lee. This is classic and it sits right side by side on top of my favorite movie list with the Goonies.
Oh, here's the... As it has to be, it's a man with me with say. Yeah, so basically what you have is the catty shack of the Crow films. Catty shack is the first...
Catty shack is the first... Catty shack is the best off movie ever made. Catty shack, too, as is Wicked Prayer, is the shittiest catty shack slash girl movie we ever made. Since we've mentioned the title already a couple times, we'll get into the info of the movie.
Yeah, so it's the Crow we could prayer, Maine 2004, at least in 2005, directed by a fucking dumbass named Lance Mangia, who went on to make 6-string samurai and nothing fucking else. Lance, if you want to, you can... You can... ...put it on a Gmail.com right knee into fangirl self.
Bring it on to the French man, China. What's his name? Mangia. It's like what they're doing.
I would just like to point out two things about this real quick. Go ahead. When searching the Crow, W.I. Which should bring up the Crow we could prayer, right?
And that's part of the title. I.D.B. it lists the Crow and then a face in the crowd, which is a 1957 Andy Griffith movie. The own Andy Griffith movie, apparently, a 1997 album.
I wouldn't say that to you. It's own Andy Griffith, I recognize the movie. Oh my God. Secondly, the main lead, who's played by Edward Furlong, is listed seventh in the credits.
Behind, a character who had all of three minutes of screen time. Spoiler, if you haven't seen it. I don't give a fuck. What the fuck, man?
I'm still trying to get past the whole, like, Crow and Andy Griffith thing. I'm going to think about it. I'm really, really, really lost here. I'm D.B.
as a renowned Crow and wicked prayer. Andy Griffith in this fucking movie or not. And who the fuck is Lance Manjona? Who got their manjona Lance?
I don't know, but what is happening? Nick, does this have to be on your... Out the window. Nick, can I just watch the fucking Apple?
Oh my God. As much as you tortured to the Apple last year, probably the less you know about this movie, the better. Okay. So, it's even better.
You're going to be watching it mostly without sound. So, you're pretty much going into this blind and deaf. Oh my God. And I'm pretty sure on the other end of it, it's a kind of about the PC thing.
I'm going to come up dumb. So, yeah. So, with that being said, one more quick thing. Yeah?
The movie has no installing city. God. It shows. Wait a minute.
This is a recording video? I wish. What the hell's happening? You're about to find out.
Damn it, my manjona inches. So, we usually say go get your snacks or whatever, but since this is why get your control substances. To be fair. Don't be fucking choke up, homies.
What? What? What? He just called him stuck birds, but who knows what's happening?
You're about to vomit because you're going to watch his movie. It's not your mark, my friend. Because we're about to hit the crow wicked prayer. That's why I didn't want any snacks.
Let's all go to the lobby. Let's all go to the lobby to get ourselves a treat. No turning back now. Where are you already?
I chose the wrong fucking time for good drinking. I chose the wrong fucking time to not pick up meth. Oh my God. Wow.
Those are some fucking spectrums. I'm going to try both tonight. I would honestly rather have a meth addiction than watch this movie again. So, before we get into it, if you want to play along at home, then I'll tell them around.
Alright. We are at the counter of where the counter down says one hour, 39 minutes, zero, eight. Oh, oh, oh, the length of the movie. Okay, sorry.
I wish you were at that. Oh, I'm sorry. I really wish to go. I wish to go.
We're in for a treat. Okay. We're at zero, zero, zero, zero, one. We're at the counter.
Who is it, Italy? As this movie is going to do, we're at the part of where it says, Domitian Films and we're getting the D. Yes. We're getting big D.
We're getting big D. So, one second in. Any last words? I'm just rolling in a reminder.
I feel like I've invested one second too much. We don't want to start the movie up all over again. So, just keep an eye on the monitor and make sure that we're still recording. I think we found the new Guantanamo Bay torture angle.
Because, honestly... Can I just have waterboarding, please? Seriously, you guys are talking like, Bill and Doug are going crazy on this one. This is Trump change compared to the Apple.
You stop it. You stop it. Now I feel, now I'm defensive. Because I sat down like, I love the Apple now.
You're going to actually dunk now. I actually like it. It's a tiny instance. Okay, I'm going to throw it on.
I am really angry at this movie because of what you and I had to do to make this happen. Can we press play? Well, press play. You've got to get one.
Does it make any way? Okay, guys. You just take down the anger a little. Okay, and reminder, we are listening in.
We'll just huddle and hug after this. It's like a bandage. Okay, we're going for some shit. Okay.
Three, two, and... Go. Balls. Dimension.
Films. The only good part of the movie. Can I just tell us a good legacy? Yeah, guys.
Shut up. I would argue that the credits are going to be the best part of this film. Jacob, Hellriser. Nick, reminder, you have not seen this movie.
You don't know how... Look at these credits right now. Oh my God. Which is even like the same.
Is this a Western? Who's doing it on them? White trash Western. Oh my God.
Wait, wait. Wait, wait. Wait, wait. When Tera Reed is your sex object of the movie.
Who films? Yeah. That's the other thing right there. Who films?
Who films? A company in which films in the movie but never had one piece of product. Because they knew they could get a little cash back but they didn't want their tag name on it. By the way, I'd like to say fuck you all.
I watched the fucking football movie with her and all I remember is her being in the whipped cream bikini. That's Ali Lari piece of shit. Don't you ever compare the Queen Ali Lari to Tera Reed again. I gotta throw it out there though.
She's a really nice person. No Tera Reed is amazing. I have done. Oh, here we go.
Here we go. Ravi Sue. Is this like like a havesu? Oh my God.
This is an Indian rhythm. Is it an Indian rhythm? Is it an Indian rhythm? A toxic mind open or a resort casino?
Who would open a toxic mind? Why would you mind for... Why would you really need to close anything? Like how much land is there?
How much does a casino fucking be? The flowers in a brick of pink. Look at how bad can the fucking mind be if they got that much shit they're dumping out of it. Well it's a toxic mind so they probably want to stop the toxic.
So what do you really want to do is turn this off and watch toxic adventure. No they should just check out the comment sections of Star Wars. Tourist is toxic fandom right? Yeah, God.
Oh my God. What is with the fucking camera? Oh, what the hell? It's setting the mood.
Oh trust me. It's not the same. There are many different camera moves. It's not the same.
You like the seventh grade production credits right there? Oh my God. It's that guy. That would be tank for matrix.
Yes. Oh, I know what happened. There's a shitload of drones on this phone. That's serious.
Tank got himself. This is where it started. I don't like that. So do you guys think that toxic stuff came from the mind or do you think they went and purchased that stuff from the mind?
I think what it says that dude's making is pestilence. It's probably his own personal stash. So he makes his own toxic stuff. So wait, wait, wait.
Are there four horsemen in this? Oh, I forgot. Big drag Danny Trey. How we do this?
Yeah, and he's correct. Oh, I'm driving basic grade Danny. I'm going to say great drag everybody else. She's synonymous with shit.
Don't forget Tittor Tees. Let's not forget at this point in his life he's Bane, Jim and Jim. Jim is him. No matter how shitty the movie is he still got to go home and Bane Jim and James.
This is what led to the divorce. Yeah. That's pretty good. Oh, is it?
Oh, he's a dog. Anybody can be a ninja when you lean against it like Dan Stan's Revolution. I love the car. Oh, yeah.
So the round house is his market? Yeah. The round house is toxic barrel to spray into his face. He literally just gave himself a facial.
Well, he is a tournament. Toxic waste removal. Okay. Because he's dying.
His mission is revenge. But let's not forget they all have their own other missions that aren't revenge. Front to the back, right? Oh, oh.
Rejected. Oh, wait. No, this is a revenge tip. Okay.
Doug, he's everybody. Okay. Here it comes. No, I think this is a revenge tip.
Nope. Oh, are we about to see some consistency in the movie? Wait a minute. I want to see who death is.
And I bet you his mission is puppies. Oh, when you see who death is, it could be puppies. Yeah. The main gang is the Four Horsemen in.
Who did their fucking paintings? Another car's are intimidating at all. Exactly. That's what I was about to mention.
The most intimidating vehicles I'm playing it. What's wrong with these fucks live in? Where they're all wearing dresses and it looks like a little hustle for Ariasu. Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Also known as Salt Lake City. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I'm the outskirts where the non, what are they called, sisters? No, the one with the Mormons, the mainstream Mormons go like we were not with them.
Is she death? Nope. She's banging death. Oh, I'm just confused because why is she slinging her down back and forth?
Obviously. Who the fuck does a sniper or like a silencer on a sniper rifle? We don't want to know where it's coming from. What the fuck is the accuracy?
Goddamn it, do they play any video games? Oh, okay. You're still going to wait until logic for the Quero with the prayer. So I like that.
No place for that. I really, really like that it says, county jail. Oh, wait, I got it. That's your guy who has bigger casting than a peripheral.
Oh, my God. That priest. The one that hung the kid? Yeah, that's it.
Yeah. Well, there's more time. I think it's a little bit more time. Yeah.
And he gets sixth-strained on the movie. Oh, my gosh. That's a good job. That's the only one.
That's just talking about the movie. Oh, my God. Shut up. So he whacked the guy in the apron, I did a complete flute.
Yeah. By the way, he's doing this completely blunt because he's death. And he's approaching. Yeah.
That's okay. He's able to do it because he's a vampire, right? Yeah. Yeah.
But there honestly has to be contracts that force some of these people on this movie. Oh, yeah. There's no fucking way. He was probably dimensioned had hold rights on these people and they probably wanted to move on.
Oh, this is foggy, teary. Oh, yeah. This is just the both the guest, teary. Yeah.
I'm a fairy part of that all of that. So wait. Wait a minute, how the fuck was that? How do you get the cuff off the one hand?
When she shot the chain? He still got the... Oh, boy. Uh oh.
I can't cross it because it's a fucking hella complicated man. Yeah, exactly. He's right on screen. Oh, okay.
He should be sparkling. Stay through the shadows. Wait. No, that's the wrong kind of vampire.
Oh, he's our real vampires. No, that's not what we call man-piers. He's just dressed already in fucking tank top and... Yeah, no, no, no.
And a totally, totally, passable belt buckle according to jail centers. Oh, yeah, exactly. That's not your man at all. No, no, no.
You can't hear somebody about a belt buckle. No, no, no. All right. Not gonna go someplace.
There he is. Mr. Kratt. He's a good lord.
I didn't probably get any more signs during this movie. Okay, what the fuck is that? Yeah, anybody else noticed that he opened the gun, the open the gun, I'm sorry, opened the engine. Open the air.
Okay, literally. Okay, open chamber. To spin it and close it again. Yes.
But you know what? His mission's raising. Well, they got really raised. But there's probably a little bit of revenge on your team.
Oh, is this top milling? Yeah. You guys weren't aware of who got top milling in the movie? Oh, pestilence.
Oh, shit. Mr. Fisch, yourself. He's listening right now, the one.
What? I'm listening to shit. Yeah. Oh, great.
Oh, like he gives it in. Your local satanic coal is back in black. You're local. They're not a nationwide.
You don't have what with those. Yeah, but if your local satanic coal... Spike runs those. Yeah, this guy's getting better.
Billy Nutter for a long guys. By the way, gasoline, ignites because it's huge. Yeah, I was about to say, what do he be in the flames right now? Yeah, he would.
Oh, made to cool yourself. It's homes, not homes. This is the man on the cloth? Yeah.
This is delivery. Well, I know. This is why it's the directors. Okay, let's have our conversation.
Okay. There's a conversation I want to have with you. Sure. So I would like you to start with your part talking about...
Do you want to wait? Is it any of them? No. What do we talk about bringing in the girl versus...
Oh, we'll get to that part. Okay, because the one thing I was really going to point out right there... Wait, what? So we got to hell with nobody.
Oh, he's got a scorpion on his chest. Oh my god. Don't tell a phy. And the dog...
No, they probably have to help him with the dog. Because he knows the dog looks like he does one. He got to sleep on the couch. I got him, man.
Edward Folling still looks... Okay. He doesn't look like he's game at... That'll give it time when he's like a sharpie on the face.
Oh shit. The bird in the crow? What the f... No, did I?
Spoke too soon. Yeah. And you hear on the radio right now Danny Trejo doing his best... Vangelic level.
Oh, oh. Waging. How much do I want to bet this is Edward Folling's real trailer? Probably is.
Oh boy, I'm sorry. I just got a screenshot from the movie. Call me off the card. I'm afraid you want to point out this is inspired by the crow looking for a novel.
Oh, I know which thing. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Which actually had no similarities to the movie.
So this is a novel. So this is a novel. So this is always a word now. This is the World War Z film conversion of the crow.
Yeah. I don't want to always be a non-dog. Who's for the boot? Oh, jeez.
So no backstory as to... Oh, by the way, if you guys want to know anything about Edward Folling's movie, don't. You're not going to. We get no backstory and one flashback to a backstory with no explanation.
Oh, great. So this is the apple. Yeah. That's a native garb.
The titties hang out? Oh, wow. I want to join that girl. Up towards this movie.
Any... You know, I like the little girl near reading and the getting of the original crow. Yeah, it's just, yeah. Isn't it so similar?
Yeah. Well, yeah. They have to try to bridge it somehow. Oh, I know, right?
Oh, let's re-explain the crow to you again. Yeah. Because you guys are going to want to know why we don't make any sense. Because you're already like 11 minutes in this movie.
What the fuck is this? Yeah. It's the only thing that links it. And then you're like, oh, wait a second.
That's another thing that makes sense right there too. Let's see. Take two suitcases out the door. And then kick one?
Leave some and kick some. Yeah. Because you don't see them with them. You see them with a lunchbox and...
A radio. And a chair. A chair. It's a radio.
I don't even want a lunchbox. Okay. Remember, is he not his way to work? What is he doing?
He's the worst director ever. And then, and Jaina. UB Bull? No.
UB Bull at least does research on his movies. No. And he also depends on movies by boxing the shit out of you. Yeah.
You know? A lot of it is just like it was white car and all stuff. And then there's just like a little piece of leather strap and everything. This movie has such potential to do.
I know. I'm gonna get there. Oh, yeah. This was Edward Furlong still not crazy.
Right. Yeah. So we still had different roles. Yeah.
Right. This was before he couldn't get insurance. Yeah. Yeah.
Even more out of Stara Reed. The Bring of the Legend Dennis Hopper. And he's terrible. Yeah.
You know, it's fine. I've never reminded me that Salvation skipped theaters. Salvation is better than it should. No, not to take on top.
That's exactly the point I was getting at. Salvation. I mean, remember when we heard about the Crow Salvation? And it was it just we learned about it through its freaking soundtrack?
Jimmy Clairvo. That's right. Jimmy Clairvo. Like the pictures of the fucking book writing with it.
It played the Crow now and that one. Yeah. The fact it was scarce. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. It was interesting. It was awesome.
That was awesome. See, this movie got the token one reek release to theaters. That's it? Oh, yeah.
Oh my gosh. That's all that they justified giving this movie. I'm surprised they even justified giving it that much. Right?
Because it was totally contractally obligated. Oh. Much like Nick having to do this comment. Still.
This is what happens when you don't read the fight prank, Nick. Yeah, I'm going to hire a fucking lawyer. I'm still trying to figure out which contracts you guys are signed because. Oh, you know, you don't know.
I'm not going to make it. You have no idea how to contract. I got these guys signed. There was a chicken involved in some bones and blood spray across paper.
I got them. Okay. Bones. Bones doesn't.
Chicken bones are bones as in. Hey, bones. How about bones as in the show? The day to be it.
Oh, shit. But she just got a shot of the money. Have you lost your minds? Yes.
Yeah. This is a long time ago. He's a father father. Yeah.
He's a paidro. He's a paidro. He's a hot drink. Hot drink.
This way. You remember a favorite scene in the crow where the dead crow or almost dead crow is being protected and everything? Oh, yeah. That's a little flashback.
Oh, great. Yeah. Are we calling on it? You don't want to get in a relationship with this man.
The last good thing he did was terminate it to 3D adventure across time. Yeah. That's that right? That's the holy shit to the curb.
Yeah. Came back, got his suit. And now his face is clean. And now his face is clean.
What the hell? The dog's just like anything. Uh-huh. Well, the dog's like, no.
I'm not acting. Yeah. The dog's just not acting. Oh, look.
Here's the nice white cat for the cheerily. Yeah. Back to the dog though. Bunch of Hugo.
I think it's Hugo, isn't it? That ties to the first film. That fucking was game joke. And got hit by the cops?
Oh, nice. But about the dog? I don't think he's part of the movie. He just won't let that.
Yeah. It's like, how I prefer a long author always. He was saying the same thing about David Bury on a seat. Got lost.
Car up down. He's walking on one. Are you actually moving here? Yeah.
You're hitting Bury on a seat. You're hitting this movie now. Yeah. All right.
Cool. Oh, no. It's like, fuck. I'm not damn it.
There should be something called a career clause in a contract. Have a career. Which, if you have a career and you're for trash shopping and you do the movie, if the movie is so terrible that it could constantly kill your career, you should be able to get out of your contract. Well, what else do they do?
That's the whole episode. No worries. Oh, there it is. Oh, right.
Yeah. Did you run my career? Did you like my joke? Oh, I'm going to take a lot of things on his career as this keeps going.
I got my publicist. That's what he kept saying. That's what happened to you. Sweet wins are not though on that tie.
Oh, that's OK. Tie fucking tie. Really? It's how I taught you.
It's been well. Oh, yeah. Well, last time I actually wore a tie was The Wedding in Hawaii and I had The Frontest Lady held me. That's the way you get a number.
She's like, eh, doesn't matter. She was twenty once. Okay so now just so you guys know the sheriff is about to kill somebody. Right?
Right. Then brought daylight. And bullets move your hand and say, what the hell is that? Acting.
Uh, no that wasn't. Okay let me rephrase it. Acting? Again.
Of course again. Let me explain to you guys. Let me explain to you guys the director. The director is in charge of all the departments giving them his idea for the movie what he wants to see from them so that they can reach maximum potential of the movie.
This is the potential. This didn't happen. There we go. Now as you watch the scene I will discuss what I was going to discuss.
Okay so you can tell this is going to be the scene where shit's going down. Okay. Which occurs eighteen nights in the movie versus three minutes in the movie and crap. Yeah.
Right. And Terry. I'm not even saying that. She is the best actor in this movie.
Actually she's the only one having fun. David doesn't look like he wants to be here. No I think David is having too much fun. Oh he is.
I think it's. I'm trying to be here. I'm going to shoot as a performance as I want. I'm not going to kick off.
Don't worry. Don't go too far in the city performances because we still have to do so. Oh hopper. Okay so there's no.
Okay so who knows who that is. We grew up together. Again no back story. Puns.
Oh my god. Oh you're the guy. Oh shit. You were talking about David Reyes.
I think he probably didn't like the wardrobe in this scene though. Oh dude nothing gets the ladies going like the right fish nets and lip gloss. You got eaten a fucking sword. You got eaten a fucking sword.
He doesn't care because he's going to die. I'm the star. Why? Why did you like it?
What's the flashback? That's not explained. No it's kind of explained. We have no idea why they're together.
All right. I'll discuss. Cool. Maybe I'll know something about this movie that I didn't know before.
Okay so otherwise they're not going to ritual. Okay. They're the local satanic cult back in black. They're the franchise.
They're the dinnies. They're the local. They're the local. Oh right they're so pretty.
They're so fucking cool. They're the parties to the national satanic cults. Yeah. Okay.
Wait, I'm going to go off subject for a second. Did you see the trailer for Halo Satan? The documentary about the satanic temple? No.
You have it? No. Might actually be better to watch right now. I'll do that after this commentary.
I'll bring it up for you. I actually want to watch it. Oh wow. That's cool.