Depression is a motherfucker. You have options. Go to mentalhealth.gov to learn more or call 1-800-273-8255 if you need immediate help. My name is Joshua Gilmore from the No Work California and Ectopod Podcast.
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Ideas from everywhere? Voices from No Wear since 2011. This is Josh. And it's fucking April in No Work California.
Are you serious? Is it April? Well, technically it has this recording in March but to give myself a little time to edit and for the people I listen to right now, it is April. And you know what that means when it comes to us.
Why? Exactly. It's our yearly tradition of shit movie commentaries. Man, we have had some fucking do's.
We've done a room in the past. We've done Apple. We could prayer. Before we did commentaries, we talked about Eric Bennett's Hulk.
Yeah, the Angly Hulk. We've both had an elation. Oh, for fuck's sake. Why did you bring that?
Because we've got a good little fun in the movie now. That's true. We do. Yeah.
But we've done, commentary-wise we've done, last year. I gave you head last year. You did give me head last year finally. I don't know what Phil complained so much about it.
I feel like we should have just collectively dropped acid and watched that movie and I bet you it would have made 100%. Oh, yeah. Did you drop acid and all those guys? Yeah, when you dropped acid to write it.
But it was a hard word to get to this year because initially we were going to try to do it with everybody in the room. Right. And if we would have done that, I kind of laid it to you and Doug to pick a movie. Yes.
But our vast knowledge of films doesn't include some of the weirdest fucking movies in the history of cinema. This guy has locked away in his brain. I have criteria when it comes to why. And we've talked about it in the past and I'll tell you it right now.
It's basically, it can't be like one of those sci-fi movies. It can't be like Sharknado or Rolla Translone. Right. It's something that's intended to be a piece of shit.
Yeah. And they just bank on that. It has to be something that sets out ambitiously to be amazing and just ends up being one of the biggest positive crap. Like fucking cats.
Or there's a movie that me and Ken ran across recently called Joysticks. Joysticks. 1980s movie, which is basically a teen sex comedy that takes place in a neighborhood arcade. I wish I had so much more sex in 80s arcades.
Oh yeah. And it was even like the aspect of, oh, we got to save the rec center and all that crap. What? Oh yeah.
Oh my fucking god. I can't wait to do that. It's on. I believe we watched it on IMDB TV.
I will hunt it down again. It's not too nice. It is worth it. It's worth it.
It's a house sitting and we have IMDB TV now. And it's one where it wouldn't be a why because we watch it. Aren't they? No, it's like they were gunning for what they were doing.
And it's not like gunning like Sharknado gunning. It's like no, we are set out to make this comedy. That's fucking awesome. And that's what it is when it comes to wise.
It has to be something set out to be good. Or even like a movie that was amazing in the past. Right. But you're watching out on, oh fuck.
Kind of like the topic that you've chosen for us today. Yeah. Because when we were kids, are you and you're mid-late teens? Listen, motherfucker.
If it wasn't for the fact that my bones creep when I get up out of this chair, I'd get up out of this chair. Oh yeah. So just to put it on wax right now, I recently went to Las Vegas and I passed by the stadium. No.
Where are the waiters playing? Fucking solid burn. Laura Locker ass off when she's on it. And I was even my burn.
It was Kim's cousin's boyfriend that said as we're passing by. Oh, that's the only house that loses in Vegas. I'm like, oh my god, I remember that shit. Wow.
But back to what we are about to unleash on ourselves this year because I haven't watched this one since the first time. I think I've only watched it once. So on our, if you watch our live cast, we had pontificated. That's a big word for you there, mother.
We pontificated that it was going to be 89 or 90. In fact, it is. 1991. 1991.
This is the second movie in the illustrious movie canon of one, Teri Baliyah. No, no, no, no, aka Hulk Hogan. You have to understand, I could easily have skated by saying that this came out 89, which I just confused with No Holds Bar. That's when it came out.
And that would put me square and junior high. This puts me in my freshman year of high school. I thought I'd have been like, crisis time. Yeah, freshman heading into sophomore and for fuck's sake.
What? It's a bad one. Considering I took my high school sweetheart to go see the Power Rangers movie, this may be not a huge shock to a lot of people. But nonetheless, for fuck's sake.
I think we said we're going to be watching suburban commando this year. Yes, now what we've done in the past is we always like to try to start at 0, 0, 0, 0 straight across the board. Last year, I think we did head from the menu and just hit start movie or play movie. Because the menu was very psychedelic.
No, not as psychedelic. It was very kind of paced. It was very kind of paced. And actually, when we were looking at this one, this looked super fucking, I thought you, I looked at your DVD and I was like, okay, this is a new line, send me a DVD.
It looks like a fucking bootleg. It's a library title. It's fucking terrible. They do it in their caribones that win.
Yes, Tim out. 100%. So again, this year, we're going to start at the main menu and hit play movie from that point. All right, so the DVD is inserted and we are seeing a starry field with what I'm guessing is supposed to be Earth.
I, for fucking seriously thought this was one of those weird coming soon. Something near you. Nope, this is the title screen. And also, it kind of was weird seeing Hogan's voice flying through.
Yeah, this is very thunder lippy, you know, hulk in his prime sort of days. Oh, this is toll hulk in his prime because it's like they made another movie with him. Yeah, absolutely. So this, okay, should I drop a fun fact now or should we wait until after the film?
Which part? The one about this was originally intended. Oh, yeah, let's actually not fucking let's do it. All right.
So this film was originally intended for Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger. I never knew that. To be replacing, of course, Schwarzenegger would be playing Hogan's part and Danny DeVito would be playing Christopher Lloyd's part. But they signed on to do twins instead.
So New Line Cinema Option about the rights to do the film and gave this to Hogan as a follow up to No Holds Bar, which was a blockbuster success. At the time. In 1989. So I thought that was kind of funny that they, you know, like this was initially supposed to be a much more.
DeVito, Schwarzenegger, no. Yeah, which I think would have been kind of fucking cool today. They might have been here moving. But anyway, we ended up getting Chris Veloid.
Great choice. Great choice at the time, but in retrospect, Jesus Christ. Enough of the trivia. We are at the home screen with that beautiful two word, the play movie and I'm about to do it right now.
Wide screen or full screen. So let you guys catch up and everything. Let's go wide. Let's go wide.
So we're hitting wide screen three, two and one. It's funny. That's still framing him. He looked high as a guy.
Oh, yeah. She probably was probably where take your vitamins. Train smokey doobs. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. He is set in the house. This is official. Look at that new line.
He has said that he, he, uh, that was the number one. Maybe that's the reason he's such an asshole. Maybe he may not have been knocking there one other. Nope.
He just, I don't know. Some people need to chill the fuck out. We need help some people and sometimes he just shouldn't take it. Oh, that's right.
New line, cinema title is so good. They need to show it to you twice. Yeah. But put home cinema underneath.
Yeah, just make sure you know you're watching that home, right? Yeah. More Star Wars. It has a very, uh, oh.
Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Is that a Halloween? No.
Oh, look. There's some ships that kind of look vaguely like X-wings that went off their diet. And space ball one? Is that space ball one?
No. I mean, the lower number of the fully like space ball three or something. Yeah, it's moving a lot faster. Ooh, look at the donks on that.
Yeah. And look at the freaking production value here. Oh, they look like Nazi miners. Yeah.
Nazi like coal miners, not like Nazi kids. But the fuck it looks like Chuck the novelist. We had a history of that. Which could help.
God, if the aliens are really like this, then thank God they haven't invaded. Oh, God. This is why there's no humans in space. Yeah.
Well, did you notice in the background how long the explosion like was sitting there? Oh, did they just freeze frame it? Yeah, freeze frame it. We don't want you to miss this explosion.
This is our sci-fi, you know, SFX department. It's such a big explosion. It's still going. Can't tell if this guy's a judge or if he's supposed to be Darth Vader or if he's supposed to be the Emperor and Darth Vader, he'll be a Matador.
I'll leave it up. Oh, look at those kicks. If Nike releases those retro, I'm getting them. Oh, yeah.
They're here. Here we go. We got the copy shot here. Is that J news?
Wait a minute. Is that the guy's from Nelson? Nelson? Yeah.
More than, no, that's extreme. That's extreme. But either way. Ooh, look at that missing headband.
Yeah. Is he a little brave like he's a pad one? Pretty much. And then maybe the reason for the brave, the other product.
Like hairstyles were like, the chat is deep. Oh, okay. So he used the guy's head to bash his way in there. Oh, the first one on the liner of the movie.
That was definitely a short-sneaker line. Yeah. The cosplayer was going down. Oh, he's too rarely blinded by all the pyro.
Yeah. And doing more moves he ever did in any wrestling, bringing a tired time of his career. See, I told you the Nintendo power glove wasn't used to this. Oh, oh shit.
What's the difference between this and an actual Hogan match? He's selling the punches. He's getting beat up. Is that the nasty boys?
Why not as his boys, so I wouldn't be shocked. It's true. I just loved the knob. Yeah.
Uh-oh. I guess this dude is a good guy, the guy that Baldi was talking to. Oh, playing card to the hand. Oh, wow.
Oh, he locked it off. Holy shit. Uh-oh. He's growing a claw back.
Are we watching Mario Bros. now? Yeah, it's kind of nasty. Wow.
They use that same fucking voice that's Goro's voice that's Toka and Razor from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah. Why don't we have a touch? That's true.
Yeah. Another wrestler. Kevin Nash. Oh, I mean Kevin went and saw a dog.
Okay. And everything really freaking good. Okay. Kevin Nash was in it.
He's in it really. Yeah. He plays a popcorn. That makes sense.
Yeah. Honestly really good. Chang team's been making really good choices. Hey, these are...
Wait, did he just blow up the President guy too? Oh, like Oscar Wordwood in Special Ethics right there. Wow. I think the President guy, wow.
He's pressing one button to stabilize. It's not working. I can only tell that this is some grade A level crap. That's what it was.
His power glove was too big and he couldn't. A tractor beam. Isn't that the ship that stitched? Steels?
That was a cartoon. That was a cartoon. We get in a better movie. We're actually famous at this time.
Galactic, we have 80s drug terms in the space. So he has to go knock on some space coat. What's wrong about that named Shep Ramsey? Shep.
Why did he just go full circle and call him Shep? That wasn't fucking hilarious. Yeah. Just go with it.
You know you wanted to call him that. Oh, they asked him to emote irritation? Yeah. They wanted to go on vacation.
Okay. If this is what I think is about to happen, they could have done a little bit better on why he gets to earth. Okay. I got to know who this dude is.
I know that guy. Yeah. And I can't think of his name and I didn't see him in the credits. We got to play Chuck Donopolis in Bill and Tension since we have a history with him now.
Right? Since he was in the Apple and all that fun stuff. Oh, let me see. Talk amongst yourselves.
Gunny, get food. Oh, title sequence. So we'll go with the involved. Maybe.
Question for Lloyd. Why am I here? Chris, we're Lloyd. Now in Mandalorian season three.
I was just going to mention that shit. Ew. Yeah, we know. Separate Commando.
Oh, here's your Bligatory 1991's rap. Shut the ball. Nope. Nobody fucking rewelled their trucks.
Oh my god, sir. Wow. Maybe it would release this soundtrack on vinyl. Oh, did you hear that?
What is it? Hogan's a part of the rap too. Whoa. Oh my dear god.
It took a one step above the whole Bligatory 90s rap intro to a movie. They brought in a star too. Especially a star that does not rap. What does he think he is?
Much of a man running shit. It does play a mean like guitar. Okay. Why did she just cry in the trailer?
I knew the shining ones. I'd rather have Stanley Kirby kicking in my door. And honestly not to make jokes about that because all that bullshit is another round of Dershury that should never have happened. Yeah, and it's one of those things where it produces a certain performance.
Yeah, but especially where she's at now with her mental health and everything. Both Jack Nicholson and Kureberg should honestly be ashamed of themselves for that. The shit that I did put her through. Oh my god, there was a 95-5K LOS.
Oh. This is a Mark and Briner. I'm a second producer. Hold on again.
Get the fuck out. I'm Doc Brown, dammit. Frank Appelow, that means- That sounds real funny. Yeah.
My turn to look up something. The secretary was on. Yeah. Oh, there he is.
Larry Miller. Yep. The Bligatory comedic people do work. Yeah, there we go.
Frank Appelow. Oh, wow. Yeah. He's familiar because he wrote Confidentine in 2005.
Oh, all right. All right. Larry Miller. I always like this guy.
Yeah, this is his first written by credit. Luckily, not his last. That's going to be easily have happened. That's cool.
He did Confidentine. Yeah, which is super underrated. Yeah, very. Another great role.
Not Frank Miller. Larry Miller. Where he's doing the commentary. It's all right.
That's true. Larry Miller. Chairman of the board. Yep.
That one I would not let be a lie. Because that to me is a guilty pleasure movie. He was, I enjoyed him. He's one of the standouts in Pretty Woman.
Oh, yeah. And then what is the 10 things I hate about you? That I believe. Yeah, he is the dad.
Such a good dude. Which was a modern day telling of taming of the shrew. He does play great exactlys. Yeah, which will.
That's foreshadowing. Okay, is this foreshadowing maybe able to power a broken out spaceship? Yeah, I think that's exactly. Maybe to stabilize because it can't charge past .5 or something like that.
Oh, no. This is a great movie. Why we watch a shit movie. Have you watched Anaparctic yet?
No, I just have to try this movie. It's the girl who creates an identity. No. Ryan Reynolds.
Oh, you said the Adaparctic. I'm thinking inventing Anna. Oh, no. The one who's coming.
I'm sorry. Well, see, here we are on a live broadcast. Yes, we saw the other project and it is in contention right now in early in the year for my favorite film of the year. Oh, yeah, easily.
One of the best time travel movies. Unfucking believable. How good that movie was. And the kid.
Yes, the kid. Mark Ruffalo. Everybody in that one. Jennifer Garner.
Everybody in that film was fantastic. Oh, you've got to work down? We should be paying attention to. Oh, he crashed land and bars though.
Yeah. He smashed his keyboard or whatever. I love that there was an explosion when he hit the roof, but there's nothing wrong with the building or his ship. No, buyer, no.
Nothing. Yeah, it was a coal fire. But I do have to show you the video of Ryan Reynolds and the kid doing interview and the kid does the Deadpool 2 opening monologue. It does get really.
So, I words and all. The kid was so good. He embodied Ryan Reynolds. Either Ryan, like, coached him really well or during audition.
They're like, oh, God, this kid's perfect. Yeah. Hey, this was the 90s. Scania makes her still pretty popular back then.
True. This actually looked like a pretty cool. Scania makes her. He got a polity skater.
Probably did. But also do you like it? Kind of looks like Hustler Club, too. Oh, we're looking for transformers.
Oh, there's everybody driving uniform lane traveling. Yeah. The mundane car back to back rush hour. Because we're going to let the little U go.
Well, just say you know what kind of car that is. Who's going to win? I love that he's revving and that his little U goes down. So, I think he's going to turn yellow right now.
Well, everybody know that his character is a loser. And now, I'm just going to call him Shimp because I want to. Learning the world that he's in now because he hates earthlings. That kid wasn't an actor.
He just saw Hulk Hogan and walked on set. Yeah. Another kid. Is that Hulk Hogan?
Is he doing another movie? Oh, it's just Christian with his giant hand, man. Maybe he'll let me have sex with him and he'll film it. Yeah, don't want to bring that.
R.C. Cole. R.C. Cole got all of that.
Hey, little fox get out of here. It was my coin that was in there. Not really giving free money and stealing from him. Uh oh, Marvo and Campbell sold here.
Wow. This is every stereotype that you could possibly jam into this film. Dog and a lot like muzzled in a hot car. Which honestly, this person has it coming to him.
One thing I will agree with this movie, this freaking skull at wearing motherfucker deserves this shit. All right, all right. Dogs now eating his meal. Yeah, looks like pancakes.
Yeah. I got some new clothes. Oh, very short. I got two clothes.
You're going to be able to tackle. And you're fucking dog muslin. You couldn't even put his arm around him? He just had to, oh yeah, well, I guess that's true.
Pardon my furrant. As a person not from earth, how would he know about rent in apartments and stuff? Or was it kind of like that mel mac thing where it's basically everything earth has but in a mel mac key in form? Yes.
We pay with cats. Currency and food. Yeah. That kid stole P.B.
bike. Well, fuck just those drag racers sitting on the street. Like that's a full on alcohol burning funny car. Yeah.
I mean, I know some, I know some guys up here. But then we'd have to do shit. They'd have him properly in our backyard or not blocking other people's freaking driveways. Yeah.
But in the real world he could call the cops and go, hey, you need to bring this. This chodes fucking block in my driveway. Yeah. But that would be not a comedic oil to show Christopher Lloyd's looserness.
And then shit right here too. Where's the initial neighborhood? I'm a nosed to Christopher Lloyd. That's all that guy does.
He knows when Christopher Lloyd comes home, runs out his heart and does a lap around the block. He saw that other car coming a mile away but didn't see that one. Or he's the old man that lives in his lawn. Wow.
Oh, God. That kid's familiar. Yeah. Probably long dead.
Did a ton of westerns. Yeah. Prospect your guy probably. Oh, I'm Jack Ilum.
He was in a lot of stuff. Not sure. Oh, he's on Bonanza. The 1993 version of Bonanza.
Oh. I think that was the one Ralph Armand was supposed to be in. Yeah, that sounds about right. Yeah.
He was on Webster. Okay. He was in Shelley's wall. We're in a way.
We missed it because we're researching. Oh, was she trying to look sexy for him? Probably. Yeah.
He's a lonesome dog. But Anza. Uninvited. And again.
Lucky Luke. Yeah, I have a feeling this is going to be kind of like head last year. I'm having fun. I'm going to be quiet a lot.
Yeah, this is. Bring back so much memories. Are you Shelley? We need to make more money.
Yeah. And then we can rent it out to a random space person. He was in the cannonball room. How's he got?
Oh, the Soggy Bottom Gang. That's right. Yeah, they're a planter now. And broken.
Uh oh. There's the frenetic frantic guy. Yeah. She's looking it.
He's about to become a... Like there's going to be falling down but the Christopher Lloyd version of it. I'm moving that should probably be remade. I'm here to fuck your wife.
Not the only time Halleons ever said that. Luke of a John Cotta. And that well-popped hair of Hogan's. Seriously?
Yeah. Wispy blonde hair. Yeah. The frickin' stole it of the 80s.
That's scollet. I love it. In a bit I really freak out somebody if you just rented out the back apartment for somebody. And they're all sending your house.
Unless that was like an off-camera conversation. Like, oh, I have dinner with us. He does kind of look like a conehead. Yeah.
We have our chandelier in our dining room incredibly low. Like unsafe low. Uh, the old Photoshop dinner room. Yeah.
Oh yeah, it's Photoshop. I think that was just a backdrop, honestly. Probably. Yeah.
Like earlier when they were checking out the apartment and through the door it looked like a backdrop. Uh, at least you had to wear it with the forethought to turn off the light before he sneaks around. Into his white and blue striped shirt. Yeah.
Speaking of on a guy that should probably whip him in half. Whiplaman half, sorry. That's not okay. I'll take a sign to say that possibly later this month.
You may get a no-hold spark on the dairy. Hiding weapons and still spying on the dude. That's what you run and call the cops. This earth person's keeping an eye on me.
My alien senses are tingling. These are the jump tingles. That's a laser tag handle. That's all it is.
It's a stripped-out laser tag gun. Yeah. I took collectibles. Make one of these.
And watch them not sell. That's 100% a laser tag gun. Oh, easily, yeah. Production.
Oh, wow. The fricking props department and everything probably had a very low budget so they did what they could. Or they just blew it on hookers and whores. Too bad.
We couldn't let at least Chris Fort light had a little bit of a grin there going like, okay, no way to. No, that was me. Oh, big cameo coming. Dude, that guy's got a spray on fucking, oh, who's that?
It is me, Mark Colleid. Really? We're from space and we still got drawings of people and wanted posters? That was the Undertaker.
Yes, sir. And 91, if I remember correctly, was the Survivor Series. See, I didn't say survival. Series.
I wasn't going to call you on it. Yeah. The Survivor Series were taker one, the WWF World Championship title with a little bit of help from a player. Bro-ho-ho-ho-ho, where they slid the chair into the main heavy tombstone to one of the chairs.
Very, like, protected tombstone. Yeah, very protected tombstone. And then a week later, they did one of their very first special events on pay-order view, Tuesday night in Texas. Yes.
Yeah. Wasn't Tuesday night in Texas where... Jake, went up against Masha Mann and Jake's in the garage with Slap Elizabeth. Yes.
Yeah. And then I want to say it was another one of those special shows. I want to say it might have been on Tuesday, Texas or something like that. Right after Bob Backlund won the world title.
No, that was just a house show. It was just a house show where Kevin Nash, like Jack Knight, Power Bottom, the fastest title run in history. Yeah, because they realized, oh God, we put the title on the very, very old man. Look at those guys.
I'd say there are about 24-inch pythons there. Wow. Yeah. Shump.
And one of the multiple times we hear Hoka going to do in his famous, I'm sort of myself, what? Ha ha ha ha ha. And not to put the mental element back. And not the last one he does that in either.
And honestly, the way, like, Shelley Duvall, is a light woman. Hoka could probably do, oh, hey, it's Ross. How'd he do? I forgot she had her own talk show.
She did. A bunch of work holds pretty active on Twitter. Chris for Titus Spall is her retweet her own. Really?
Yeah. Oh my God, that was such a rubber knife. If you can go to the channel, if you watch that scene again, you can go to the right there, and if we can rub with that shit, it is. Did it have a pillow on his?
Yeah, I see. Oh, my God. Because that's the stereotype of kids? Yeah.
Where's his wallet? New that's animal. Oh, he's war. Well, Tony Hawk's not in the house on this one.
Yeah. He could just headbutt into the crotch. He's gonna cry to do his dick. Yeah.
And that's where his back problems begin. And a traditional Hogan bump. Oversells and then gets right back up. You're buying a new skateboard dick.
Tell my dad he's freaking Kevin Nash. Also too since he's talking to a little guy, where the hell would he get the tank top and sweats? Definitely Chris for Lloyd's. That's how he went cross over.
Yeah. I crossed out him to say that shit. Well, back to us. Well, that's so true.
Why don't I leave earlier or later just to avoid these people? I had to do that the last couple days I worked. That would not shut the fuck up. Seems like an interesting place to it.
I love that his little fucking Hugo. He revs it the whole back end dips down like that shit's rocking like a V8. Stop short. And then is that an actual issue with cars?
I'm not really mechanically inclined or anything. What's that? A car would sell out like that and then go backwards. Yeah.
Look at that laser again. Seriously. Like he would have. Yeah.
Like how are they not upset the car that was on fire? Yeah. Oh, you know what? They could be upset and then he'd walk in and go, I'm gonna bar your laser real quick and blast it.
And I think the race car guys would be like, we're not gonna screw with him anymore. But we had to show the pure might of whole chummingia or chummingia or whatever you want to call it. He gingerly moved it. Innocidion all this.
Well shit. 30,000. You got cheap one. For the tires.
Yeah. I don't have a dime. I'm from outer space. Wanda's a ho.
I heard Wanda go to third base. And that was a cheap escape board. It was gonna shatter like that. Right?
That's like a plywood one. Time to hold up. Sorry. Shut up.
The snarl. Crawling that lip. Time to get ramsied. Oh, that's literally a hulk.
There's a three foot fence, man. The hulk has no vertical leap. Need I show you how to drill that damn leg drop? Yeah.
So I'm guessing any California surfboards on top of the car. That would be my guess as well too. Because they're definitely not in Ohio. Like here, this would be a lawsuit.
Possible arrest. Incarceration. Mondo smash. Okay.