Why Saying No Feels So Dangerous: Toxic Guilt and Narcissistic Parents | Epi 169 episode artwork

EPISODE · Jul 22, 2026 · 23 MIN

Why Saying No Feels So Dangerous: Toxic Guilt and Narcissistic Parents | Epi 169

from The Narcissism Decoder · host Dr. Anthony Mazzella

In this episode, we dive into Part 2 of my conversation with Hannah Alderete, a Dynamic Emotion Focused Therapist and Certified Relational Trauma Coach, as we explore the deeper fears and unconscious beliefs that often lie beneath toxic guilt. Together, we explore why saying no, setting boundaries, or disappointing others can feel so dangerous—even when no "actual" harm is being done. We also discuss what healing looks like when that guilt begins to loosen, including the emergence of anger and all the emotions that guilt may have been concealing. The deeper question many people eventually face: Who am I without this guilt?Learn more about Hannah's work:   heartfeltonlinetherapy.comIf you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.  Contact me Directly with observations, questions or comments:  [email protected] You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on: https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/ https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder  Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.comDr. Anthony Mazzella is a psychoanalyst and psychodynamic psychotherapist specializing in narcissism, personality disorders, and relational dynamics.

Episode metadata supplied by the publisher feed · Published Jul 22, 2026

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In this episode, we dive into Part 2 of my conversation with Hannah Alderete, a Dynamic Emotion Focused Therapist and Certified Relational Trauma Coach, as we explore the deeper fears and unconscious beliefs that often lie beneath toxic guilt. Together, we explore why saying no, setting boundaries, or disappointing others can feel so dangerous—even when no "actual" harm is being done. We also discuss what healing looks like when that guilt begins to loosen, including the emergence of anger an...

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Why Saying No Feels So Dangerous: Toxic Guilt and Narcissistic Parents | Epi 169

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