Why the Future of Dating Is Offline | Esha Thaper and Ilana Orlievsky (The List) - E18 episode artwork

EPISODE · Apr 6, 2026 · 1H 46M

Why the Future of Dating Is Offline | Esha Thaper and Ilana Orlievsky (The List) - E18

from Human Kinder · host Cian Mc Enroe

Modern dating has given us more options than ever, yet many people feel more disconnected, burnt out, and frustrated than ever before.In this episode, I’m joined by Ilana Orlievsky and Esha Thaper, founders of The List, a curated group of people who want to meet other intentional, emotionally-aware people for connections, romance, or something more meaningful. We explore why so many conscious, kind, successful people are struggling to find meaningful connection in a world shaped by dating apps, endless choice, and misleading identities.This episode is about creating a space for love to thrive, both internally and externally. We talk about why real connection cannot be optimised, why self-awareness and vulnerability matter so much in dating, and why the future of dating may depend on getting back to real-life human connection.You’ll leave with a fresh frame for dating and practical things you can try this week.Learn more about The List: https://www.jointhelist.co/More from Human Kinder: https://linktr.ee/humankinderShow Notes00:00 AI Matchmaking Myth01:13 Welcome and Guests01:54 Modern Dating Crisis04:07 Who Is Affected07:45 Apps Changed Culture10:49 App Fatigue and Dehumanizing16:19 Using Apps Intentionally20:51 First Dates and Social Atrophy24:48 Grounded Dating Mindset29:56 Know Yourself and Needs35:13 Women Want vs Need38:45 Vulnerability and Feedback44:08 Advice for Men Today50:05 Bring Back Flirting55:22 Playful Flirting Abroad56:32 Friend Zone Transition57:53 Compliments And Date Setup01:02:23 Courting And Chivalry01:03:53 Touch Without Awkwardness01:10:57 Honest Rejection Not Ghosting01:14:53 Sex Myths And Porn Impact01:22:55 Better Bedroom Mindset\01:27:41 Why Build A Dating Community01:37:09 AI Dating Versus Real Life01:42:00 Hopeful Closing And Poem

Modern dating has given us more options than ever, yet many people feel more disconnected, burnt out, and frustrated than ever before.In this episode, I’m joined by Ilana Orlievsky and Esha Thaper, founders of The List, a curated group of people who want to meet other intentional, emotionally-aware people for connections, romance, or something more meaningful. We explore why so many conscious, kind, successful people are struggling to find meaningful connection in a world shaped by dating apps, endless choice, and misleading identities.This episode is about creating a space for love to thrive, both internally and externally. We talk about why real connection cannot be optimised, why self-awareness and vulnerability matter so much in dating, and why the future of dating may depend on getting back to real-life human connection.You’ll leave with a fresh frame for dating and practical things you can try this week.Learn more about The List: https://www.jointhelist.co/More from Human Kinder: https://linktr.ee/humankinderShow Notes00:00 AI Matchmaking Myth01:13 Welcome and Guests01:54 Modern Dating Crisis04:07 Who Is Affected07:45 Apps Changed Culture10:49 App Fatigue and Dehumanizing16:19 Using Apps Intentionally20:51 First Dates and Social Atrophy24:48 Grounded Dating Mindset29:56 Know Yourself and Needs35:13 Women Want vs Need38:45 Vulnerability and Feedback44:08 Advice for Men Today50:05 Bring Back Flirting55:22 Playful Flirting Abroad56:32 Friend Zone Transition57:53 Compliments And Date Setup01:02:23 Courting And Chivalry01:03:53 Touch Without Awkwardness01:10:57 Honest Rejection Not Ghosting01:14:53 Sex Myths And Porn Impact01:22:55 Better Bedroom Mindset\01:27:41 Why Build A Dating Community01:37:09 AI Dating Versus Real Life01:42:00 Hopeful Closing And Poem

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Why the Future of Dating Is Offline | Esha Thaper and Ilana Orlievsky (The List) - E18

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This episode was published on April 6, 2026.

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Modern dating has given us more options than ever, yet many people feel more disconnected, burnt out, and frustrated than ever before.In this episode, I’m joined by Ilana Orlievsky and Esha Thaper, founders of The List, a curated group of people who...

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