Why We Chase the Unavailable: The Clinical Roots of Anxious-Avoidant Relationship Cycles

This episode explores the psychology of why we chase emotionally unavailable partners.Are you caught in a cycle of pursuing those who seem just out of reach? In this episode, Dr. Kibby delves into the psychology behind why we chase those who are hard to get. She talks about to main principles that drive this behavior, from behavioral economics to the neurobiology of attachment. She unpacks the attachment patterns that lead to the "pursuit-withdrawal" cycle, where anxious and avoidant attachments clash, creating a loop of emotional highs and lows. Through personal anecdotes and scientific insights, Dr. Kibby reveals how these patterns are rooted in our upbringing and survival mechanisms. Learn strategies to break free from this cycle, including emotion regulation techniques and the importance of secure attachments.Resources:Johnson, S. (2008). Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love.Tatkin, S. (2012). Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship.