Why We Constantly Feel Torn: The Science Behind Competing Values in Motherhood

Competing values are one of the hardest internal experiences in motherhood. It’s the moment when two things you care deeply about pull you in opposite directions — and there’s no option that feels fully “right.” These moments don’t happen because you’re doing something wrong. They happen because multiple parts of your identity matter at the exact same time.In this episode, you will learn• what competing values actually are• why your nervous system reacts so strongly in these moments• how values conflict affects identity, decision-making, and emotional regulation• why guilt increases when both options matter• how values collisions show up in everyday motherhood• what to do when you feel torn between your needs and your child’s• how to move through these moments with clarity instead of self-blameIf you want to see this mapped out visually and begin practicing the Inner Work tools you hear about on the podcast, download the free Inner Work Starter Pack at bemomyourway.com.