Why you don’t feel loved enough.

Trying to get the person to choose us again, prove their love for us, or trying to find the relationship that will finally make us feel held, adored, connected, and safe. Sound familiar? If you truly weren’t getting your needs met in partnership and your heart was open… you would invest in seeing if you could change that, and if you couldn’t, you would leave. But it’s rarely that simple…because we close our hearts. We make up that THEY are the source of love and leaving means losing love. So we stay and we manipulate, we beg, we fawn, we fight, we perform, we resent, we control. Things get very complicated from this mistaken belief. When I make one person the source of love, every rupture with them starts to feel like exile from love itself. What if the problem isn’t that love is missing? What if love is everywhere, and the problem is we’ve closed our heart. In this episode, I’m talking about why heartbreak, loneliness, anger, grief, and longing are not necessarily a disconnection from love, the key distinction, and why making one person responsible for having you feel loved is a losing proposition. Your relationship status does not determine your access to love, and I’ll explain exactly why. **I referenced “Muse”, which is short for Becoming the Muse, my 6-month women’s program. About Me I’m Dr. Caite Gordon: intimacy, sex, and relationship coaching, Doctor of Chinese Medicine, and feminine embodiment teacher. For more than a decade, I’ve guided women and couples through the landscapes of healing, intimacy, and eros. My work draws from eastern medicine, functional medicine, somatic healing, spirituality, and years spent sitting with thousands of people in life’s most vulnerable and sacred moments. I’m fascinated by what allows us to become more fully ourselves: to unwind old survival strategies, trust our bodies, create nourishing relationships, and build lives infused with vitality, meaning, and pleasure. This Substack is an extension of that exploration—a place for conversations about embodiment, intimacy, spirituality, women’s health, and the art of being human. If these words resonate, I’m glad you’re here. Connect with me on Instagram Book a call This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit caitlingordon.substack.com/subscribe