Why Your “Self-Improvement” Feels Like Self-Abuse: Grace, CPTSD, and the Naked Truth of Healing with Scott Stolarick

If you grew up in a high-control religion or a "behavior-focused" home, you weren’t taught how to heal: you were taught how to perform. You’ve been told that if you just pray harder, work harder, or follow the right formula, you’ll finally feel "fixed." But the truth? That constant self-correction is just another form of the trauma you’re trying to escape.In this Naked Conversation, Rachel Abi sits down with mental health expert Scott Stolarick to strip away the bullshit surrounding "self-help." We’re talking about the invisible weight of CPTSD, the shame of feeling like you’re "failing" at healing, and why self-grace isn't some weak, "woo-woo" concept: it’s the only way out of the cage.In this episode, we get fucking real about:The Performance Trap: Why your "healing journey" feels like another chore you’re failing at.Religious & Parental Ghosting: Breaking free from the "good girl" conditioning of high-control backgrounds and emotionally stunted parents.The Anatomy of Self-Attack: How to identify the inner critic that was planted in you by people who couldn't handle your light.Practical Self-Grace: Moving from judgment to acceptance without a 10-step formula.Trusting Your Gut: How to stop looking for external "experts" and start coming home to your own intuition.Healing isn't a linear path; it’s a messy, vulnerable rebirth. If you’re tired of feeling small in a system designed to keep you boxed in, this conversation is the permission slip you didn't know you needed to stop performing and start existing.Guest Resource: Find Scott’s work and tools for the journey at mosaicpathwaycounseling.org.