You have such a pretty face! Women, Trauma Food & Addiction with Kelley Gunter

Kelley Gunter is an internationally acclaimed speaker, life coach, and author of the memoir, You Have Such a Pretty Face. She is a survivor, emotional warrior, and a woman in recovery who is unafraid to tell her truth. She went through a 243lb weight loss journey and opens up about her multiple addictions in this week's episode. If she can get through to the other side, so can you.   TAKEAWAYS: [2:05] For many women, it's very hard to tell their truth due to society's expectations of them. [3:35] Kelley shares why now is the perfect time to share her truth and her story. [4:05] Kelley made a promise to God that if she could get past this dark time in her life, she will use her voice to empower others. [6:15] When Kelley was 400lb, people would often tell her it was 'such a shame' she was so overweight because 'she had such a pretty face'. It killed her soul every time she heard that. [7:40] When trying to give a compliment, drop out the qualifier. Just say you're pretty! [9:10] Kelley shares her experiences on what it was like to be 'that fat girl'. [11:25] A lot of women end up consciously gaining a large amount of weight because it makes them feel safe and keeps an arm's distance away from men. Kelley shares her thoughts on this. [12:45] How does someone gain 400lb? [14:45] Our pain speaks to us in different languages. [21:10] Kelley was terribly insecure and would often try to buy everybody’s love. [23:50] Most of our addictions don’t come up as ‘just one thing’. It’s a host of issues. [24:45] Kelley’s gambling issues brought everything and her whole life to her knees. [26:30] Kelley knew she wasn’t a bad person, she was a broken person. We all make mistakes, but we aren’t our mistakes. [31:40] Remember, tomorrow is a new day. [34:45] Kelley talks about her upcoming second book.   RESOURCES:  The Porn Panic: Is Porn a ‘Public Health Crisis’? Sex and Relationship Healing @RobWeissMSW Sex Addiction 101  Seeking Integrity Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men  Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency Connect with Kelley: Kelleygunter.com Kelley’s book: You Have Such a Pretty Face   QUOTES: “I was in such a dark place in my life, I was praying to God to let me die, and I couldn't find any truthful stories of people who had made mistakes, people who had suffered, and came out on the other side of it.” “The world can be very, very cruel. Even more painful than the mean comments was that I was just invisible. The world just sees right past you, like you don't even matter.” “Food was the one thing I could go to that would never let me down. I wasn't trying to push people away, but it was the only thing I loved and it loved me back.” “Unhealed trauma will sit quietly in the control room of your soul dictating every calamity.”