Your Nervous System Killed Your Libido (Here’s How to Get It Back) — with Dr. Julie Merriman
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EPISODE · Jul 15, 2026 · 52 MIN

Your Nervous System Killed Your Libido (Here’s How to Get It Back) — with Dr. Julie Merriman

from Outsmart Burnout: Midlife Wellness for Women with Dr. Zarya Rubin · host Dr. Zarya Rubin, MD - Physician & Burnout Expert

Dr. Julie Merriman has spent nearly 30 years studying compassion fatigue and her own “scorched earth” burnout. A PhD-educated counselor, educator, and former department chair, her latest book, Are We Gonna Have Sex or What?, takes on the question hiding underneath every burned-out woman’s silence: what happened to my desire?We unpack the difference between burnout, compassion fatigue, and moral injury; why a dysregulated nervous system reads a stressful email the same way it views a saber-toothed tiger; and why desire is the first thing to go offline when your body doesn’t feel safe. She reframes resentment as a “sacred emotion” worth listening to rather than suppressing, explains why novelty keeps desire in the room, and makes the case that sex is a skill — one you can keep learning at any age.In this episode:The real difference between burnout, compassion fatigue, and moral injuryWhy a dysregulated nervous system shuts down pleasure and desire firstSpontaneous vs. responsive desire — and why most women rely on the latterThe “schedule sex” catch-22, and the ritual Dr. Jules uses insteadResentment as a sacred emotion, and its hidden role in intimacyWhy novelty matters for desire — at any ageSex as a skill you can learn and improve throughout your lifeConnect with Dr. Julie Merriman:Website: JulieMerrimanPhD.comBook: Are We Gonna Have Sex or What?Free resources: the Desire Reset Guide and the Somatic Signatures quiz (linked on her website)Podcasts: The Compassion Fatigue Cure and Sexy After 50Connect with Dr. Zarya, The Burnout Doctor:Website: www.theburnoutdoctor.comIG: www.instagram.com/theburnoutMDGet your FREE Burnout to Balance Toolkit:https://drzarya.myflodesk.com/burnouttoolkitBook a FREE Consult with The Burnout Doctor: https://calendly.com/drzarya/free-burnout-consultReach out with questions or to book The Burnout Doctor for your next event: [email protected]

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Your Nervous System Killed Your Libido (Here’s How to Get It Back) — with Dr. Julie Merriman

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This episode was published on July 15, 2026.

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